What if a vampire appeared before you and wanted to make you one of her servants?

what if a vampire appeared before you and wanted to make you one of her servants?

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I always have a toothpick for this kinds of situations

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Give her the stake.

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She would have to prove herself. I don't serve just any queen.
She could just be some weakling no ambition upstart

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I love serving, but I don't want to be a thrall. Either she turns me into a vampire or I contact the Catholic church to send to one of their secret soldiers to murder her.

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use my crucifix to trap her in the corner of the room and torture her with sunlight from the window. Then just burn her to a crisp when I am done

is it a pure silver crucifix, blessed and soaked in holy water?
otherwise it won't work.

lmao yo weak ass human ass couldn't

You think I would give up my eternal spot in God's kingdom for you?

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idk the other two factions look cool

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god isn't real, sorry to break it to you.

I unironically have multiple wards and weapons for this sort of situation. If it'll kill a skinwalker it'll kill this cunt.

got any proof for that?

Make her pancakes.

they laughed when I bought those silver bullets

aren't those for werewolves?

>Her
OK, can I speak to the male vampire lord? You know... the REAL one in charge. I don't have time for some gay ass female vampire.

>one of her servants
>one of
>plural
sorry I'm not gonna be cucked

go home batman you're drunk

Pledge my blood and allegiance on the spot and assume my place at her feet

The servant of a nudist loli vampire? Okay

I would highly advise against that as I am a complete retard and wouldn't even make a good fool.

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Sounds like work I'd tell them to fuck off

I grab my axe and try get some lasting damage in before she can kill me. She is an unholy abomination.

>If it'll kill a skinwalker
elaborate

I think I'm already secretly a vampire.
I dream often about vampires kneeling to me and drinking my blood through my wrists.