Hey frens

I parked illegally today.. it was downtown.. reason is obvious based on other facts.

balding bros... we won

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tf you mean aldis dumb nigger?

No hair but also no throat cancer. Definitely winning.

The mailman made a mistake and I got my neighbor's mail. So I went over to his house and put it in his mailbox. Believe it or not, that's a federal crime.

I denied the holocaust and called a tranny a man. Are those illegal yet?

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I did all of the crime.

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I just fapped to imaginary 10 year olds and will keep on doing so 'cuz you can't stop me...

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I been washing my hands.