Whats the quickest way to get a blowjob

Buy a blowjob stroker for £25 from a sexshop, suck your own cock, goto an lgbt bar that stays open till morning someone will eventually go down on you, get someone stupid enough to do it for money, simply get a girlfriend/boyfriend/both

tried the fleshlight turbo, supposedly one of the best, hand is still better imo

My question is: what is the quickest way to g i v e a blowjob?

Get cancer in your vulva

This

grindr or sniffies
if you indicate you are straight, which i realize sounds like a paradox,you will get action much faster. the fags jump over themselves to suck "straight" cock
use burner info, dont give them your number or name or where you live
enjoy extremely easy head

and this works too.
grindr faster, but if you're in the sticks its faster to get someone from reddit to suck you off. And they fucking will. you can post for a female all day for weeks and never get a bite, a dude will be f5'ing that page with his dick out waiting for you.

how do you make an account without a phone number? Is there a temp phone number site that works just to activate the account?

no idea, sorry. And no, as far as i know, none of the temp number sites would work as they likely block all voip numbers by default.
I'm bi but very closeted and get off on the sneaking around, so i use burner phones. very cheap pre paid shit.
there are burner apps that give you a number for texting purposes but pretty sure those do not work for verification either (but just fine for hookup secrecy).

since you are asking it means you dont want it on your "real" number, so your best bet is getting a cheapo burner. Convenience stores have them, even cheaper somewhere like bestbuy or walmart or something.

also if you use a number to set up an account, you can then use bluestacks or something if you do not want to have it on your phone. but the initial set up needs number verification.

Yeah I dont want my number out there and I was hoping I could do it without paying/finding a burner phone. But if that really is the only option I have to try. Can you link me the burner you use?

How do I get a reddot to suck me ?

say hi to a black girl and buy her mcdonalds

sorry, i forget what it is but i got the one im using now at a 7-11 for i want to say 30 or 40 bucks. And then a prepaid card for minutes. all i use it for is basically the number and then texting back forth (not sexting) before meeting if necessary.
its a t-mobile but not sure if that depends on the area or whatever. They have another brand too but i forget. Tracphone?
if no one goes through your mail, amazon has retardedly cheap basic phones as well.

a burner app MIGHT work but you will want to find out for sure. I'm sure it does not but its been a long time since i messed with those.
just makes a post on that subreddit. Or the dirty R4R one. If you normally use reddit then be sure its a throwaway so the account you use to argue about basketball isnt also looking for gay blowjobs.
Anyhow its quick, you specify what you want and where you are. there will be a key on the page somewhere for the acronyms to make it easy for someone to see.
i've used it but it feels like too often someone is wanting to talk dirty but not actually suck my dick and im usually in a hurry so thats not as productive for me. but for sure you will get replies if you say you are straight.

stop being a pussy, you're going to take that from that faggot? Beat his ass nigger, crack out the big guns