I just wanna work a job where I can survive, retire in my 60s and not live paycheck to paycheck

Here is the honest answer for you:

State government. Start ASAP. ANY JOB. Literally any full time state employee position you can get. This will start your retirement clock.

You will get COLA and step increases, and have opportunities to move up every couple of years. You can move to other state agencies all the time without effecting your retirement.

It's ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE to fire a state employee with all the protections, so stay average and you will likely outshine all of your peers, who will mostly be lazy, entitled moms with kids and a ton of doctors appointments and other shit.

You will retire in your early 60's, having had a decent living the entire time.

You're welcome.

It seems so fucking boring though.

As much as I hate govt, this user is right. My wife is a (county) govt employee and he hit the nail on the head. Their IT guy doesn’t do shit, just offloads his job to other people, and gets paid 60k or so. Infuriates me and I tell her all the time to tell her boss that I’m an IT guy and I’ll have everything running perfectly if they give me his job. They won’t fire him though, because everyone is a lazy govt employee who’s too lazy to fire people themselves.

Worst part is, every govt employee says “well, that’s govt for you.” Even the bosses. But THEY ARE THE GOVT DUDE. You are in charge, you can make decisions in your position. But you won’t, you just choose to blame government as a monolithic entity even though it’s made up of individuals like you who won’t make decisions to make things better.

Sucks.

It is, but that's the tradeoff for a really secure job with top-tier benefits.

Well paying, secure, not boring jobs require you to have some skills bro. Go to school or do an apprenticeship, something related to the field you wanna work in, and start job hunting.

Got me pegged, man. I'm a govt employee, but I'm former private sector.

I inherited a team of misfits (Also I.T.) and NONE of them are all that good at their job. I've had to get really creative to raise their performance level.

I have one turd on my team that our HR AND our EEO flat out said we cannot touch because she is a young black woman with 2 kids, and it'll just look really bad.

She's been written up by me (i'm a senior manager) 5 times, My CIO once, by HR once, and EEO hates her lying guts.

Lots of managers ARE lazy, but the system protects the rest of the worthless bastards.

TLDR, it's REALLY REALLY hard to get let go as a govt employee. Worst case, they move you to another dept.

Why do people feel entitled to more if they put in the least possible effort? Do you even hear yourself?

>where I can survive
>not live paycheck by paycheck

This is a clear indicator of your abilities, attitude, and general workload capacity.

Also you don't want it to be boring. Wake up, sweetheart.

Attached: 1642001135979.jpg (1124x1351, 681.76K)

Often jobs are boring. If it wasn’t “work” no one would pay you for it. But you gotta make it work for you. I work in the granite countertop industry. Sounds boring just from the title and yes, some days it is. But the truth is, from my perspective I get to play with computers and giant CNC machines making products from nice looking stone every day. I get to fuck around on our network and make sure all our systems are talking correctly, I get to fuck around with the machines and find cool new ways to do things, I get to fuck around and work on our computer systems, but most of all I get to look at our whole system and find more efficient ways for the shop to function. That’s what I enjoy. My boss loves that I like that stuff, and as a result of my trying to make things more efficient just because I get a boner from that stuff, his business has benefitted from it. As a result he wants to keep me here, so I’ve gotten several substantial raises since I’ve been here and basically I can do whatever I want as long as my work is done.

Bottom line is you gotta make it work for you. Don’t find a job that motivates you, because you’ll never find that. Find what motivates you and find a job that you can sort of do that thing in. Yeah, boring sometimes, but boring can mean an opportunity to advance by intentionally making things better for the sake of the company, and that can reflect well on you. And hopefully, you’ll get rewarded for it over time.

I have skills applicable, such as being a good "person with computers"/codemonkey, as you'd put it. I just can't seem to find anyone willing to hire me.

You might need to expand your skill set or relocate to somewhere with more jobs in that field if you can't find employment around you. Do you have any formal education, training, or certification? That'll go a long way towards showing an employer that you're more than just good with computers. Anybody can say "I'm good with computers" but not everyone can say "I have a degree/certificate in information technology/computer programming/cyber security."

Have people check your resume. like 4 or 5 people, even those not in I.T. It may not read well. Re-tailor your resume for every job you apply for.

Then, youtube some interview skills. Maybe you interview poorly.

After that, be groomed, be dressed for the part, and don't fucking slouch or mumble... insta turn-off for any boss.

The problem is, those jobs are rare and extremely competitive

The resume part is a good idea.
The interview & dressed part, I think I'm ok there.
Honestly, my biggest part so far has been getting interviews. Once I actually get that point, people seem to like me and I can do what they need me to do... but it's rarely ever gotten there.
I have no portfolio, formal experience/certs, etc - blank slate except for _one_ short-term job.

Yep, sounds like wife’s job. I know my enemy, and my enemy is inefficiency. I grew up sort of poor and when I moved out I never had any money. So as an adult I really, really care about input/output efficiency because growing up, it was always “how can I maximize this small amount of resources or money I have, because I don’t know when or how much I’ll have again.”

Now it’s translated to “we have this much time in a day and this much material to work with. How can I maximize every day for best efficiency.”

Government doesn’t think like that. Their budget is guaranteed because taxes are inevitable. That’s why I have govt as a system, they don’t give a shit how they spend your money, but you are forced to give it to them. If govt was more efficient, I would gladly pay taxes. But it’s a horrible system.

This!

Even low level certs tell them you are game for the role. It'll rise your resume towards the top of the pile.

Are you 12?
Do you know anything about the economic trends of the US in the past 20 years? .outside of the trades and a real college education your living in a fantasy, the American dream is long dead.
Learn a trade

are you me, bro?

This.

Really, all I can do it try REALLY REALLY hard to hire the best people moving forward.

Hey OP, hope you are taking all this shit in.

I am either going US Army or Carpentry/Electrician trades soon. I just thought that "lern to code" was still a thing, I guess, lul.

I am genuinely reading and seeing what y'all think, yeah. I'm not hard-set in my views. It just seems "out of grasp" for me if that makes sense, so I'm kinda disheartened.