I really need help and this 100% sounds like bait but I got an entire corn cob stuck up my ass...

I really need help and this 100% sounds like bait but I got an entire corn cob stuck up my ass. The butter on it must have gotten absorbed by my colon when i was sleeping or some shit cuz I fell asleep after I got it in and now it won't move any more

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lol
Lmao, even.

Photo/timestamp

pic or fake and gay

Quick! bend over! maybe I can reach it with my tongue.

This is not fucking real.
You did not put a buttered corn cob up your ass.
You are a fucking liar.

Im not taking a photo of my ass with corn inside it, I just need help getting it out. It hurts when I pull

It'll probably come out when you're shitting. The shit can't go around an entire corn cob I think.

Go to the ER you absolute mongol. It's not the first time they've seen someone with something stuck up their ass, they'll look at you weird for like 2 minutes at most.

I'm the corn cob. Can confirm it's true. I'm not gonna come out because it's warm, comfy and smells nice in here.

t.corncob

This cannot be real

Honestly it's kind of funny that to make a bait post successful all you have to do is put "this is not a bait post" and people are more inclined to believe you

and I thought this guy loved corn

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This but be adamant when you say "It was an accident" or "I fell on a corncob". It'll be a funny story for everyone but you for years.

okay but it was definetly not an accident, I fully intended for it to enter my ass hole but I forgot about it and took a nap.

>i fell on a corncob
How does one fall on a corncob and have it go up their ass?

How do you forget about a corn cob up your ass? How could you not feel it?

Fake and gay.

so I may or may not be on a lot of drugs right now, mostly codeine and alcohol

You would have to fall from a great height and with much precision, I imagine.

IT'S NOT DIFFERENT AT ALL, IS IT!?

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Warm shower? I guess the water might help melt the butter again, I mean some warm water has to get through right? aim directly at asshole.