Are you ever rude on purpose so you can push people away so they don't talk to you?

are you ever rude on purpose so you can push people away so they don't talk to you?
and are you rude to friends to see if they'll stick around?

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Depends on what you mean by rude really. I just push people away because my whole life has just been the people around me mistreating me and acting like the victim until I snap and hurt them.
Maybe I'm in denial, I really don't know anyway, but I honestly just prefer to be alone.

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i feel you
how have you been mistreated?

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This, but I've gotten to the point of not wanting to be alone. Also I'll push people away thanks to depression and knowing they are assholes who use me. Thing is, it's very hard to find people that are good people in your life. Especially as you get older and people get weirded out by you not having a lot of experiences with friends and or relationships.

It perpetuates that cycle if you talk about it. So you end up having to be very careful with what you say.

hate how i always have something to say but it always weirds people out, and if it's a joke it's rarely funny and i just come out as "cringe"
so i should really just shut my mouth, but i can't stop myself, might be adhd idk

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Mother with Munchausen by proxy, older sister addicted to heroin, both hated men, needless to say my relationships in my 20s left me regretting the fact I wasn't an "incel". I had some good friends, but they were few and far between. Eventually the bitterness just... Started calling the shots in my life. I'm alone and I wouldn't have any other way.

Girl lol

i respect you guys who can live with the loneliness

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what?

bump
i don't want my thread do die ;-;

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Yeah, that is something that takes practice and experience. You'll have to go through a lot of learning experiences where you end up alienating yourself. But if they are good people they will understand you are trying and not hate or make fun of you for it. So keep trying.

This is something I still struggle with thanks to my ADHD and own mental illnesses.

what illnesses do you have desu?
for me it's OCD, and most likely slighly autistic with ADD or ADHD

I'm ADHD, PTSD, major depressive disorder, high functioning anxiety, and possibly some other stuff.

I have had a lot of shit go on with me and my family. So I mostly avoided them once I became a teenager. I didn't really have friends at school, even though I was liked well enough I suppose.

My anxiety and depression made me avoid social stuff that I actually really enjoyed and now I regret that whenever the memories pop up about high school and college.

Now I'm stuck in a town that is really rural and has next to no way to be social with others. It sucks. I hate it, but it affords me time to work on myself.

>My anxiety and depression made me avoid social stuff that I actually really enjoyed and now I regret that whenever the memories pop up about high school and college.
this, i've experienced this and it sucks so hard

Here's what I'll say, now I'm trying to make sure if something comes up I don't avoid it and make time for it to happen. Unless it really is something that I'm truly not interested in. And even then, I still think about pushing through my mental shit and going anyways.

Lately, it's been hard. I have so much resistance to just going out and trying. I'm sinking backwards on some stuff and any little set back has me hyper fixating on it and not giving myself credit for the things I actually am accomplishing.

It's a slow tough road. And I'm all alone in keeping myself going through the numerous battles I go through on a daily basis. That's what I have to focus on. My next success and trying to keep myself up and running.

I'm a very nostalgic person and would prefer childhood friends due to having the memories to talk about. The problem is that almost all my childhood friends now suck and have issues like jealousy or victim complex.

Is it possible to make adult friends that are just as good? How to find them? Or do people generally close off to new friends at a certain point in their 40s or 50s?

I suppose one way to tap into nostalgia for new friends is to find childhood things you both have in common, like playing old video games together?

stay strong user, stay strong

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Idk if it's rude but if I feel snubbed or left out by friends or family for a long enough time I do begin to distance myself and eventually cut contact as I don't think they value me the same way I would then. I don't really trust or like anyone anymore so maybe that plan wasn't the best one, idk.

Thank you dude, you too. I hope you find a great environment full of supportive friends and family and loving relationship where you don't feel the need to push people away.

Same kinda, but I would say hobbies that have you interacting in forums or in real life that lead to you talking directly are far better at helping create and foster friendships.

Also, the older you get the better it is to let stuff go and keep them around. It's fucking hard to be alone and even harder to find new people. Don't be petty. Forgive fast and learn to let go faster.

>Don't be petty. Forgive fast and learn to let go faster.
Sounds like you haven't been around chronic narcissists who have no problem belittling you, but can't take any criticism or admit any fault of their own.
Coming back to them reinforces them to keep acting the same way,