Through some miracle, you are now the Pope!!! What do?
Through some miracle, you are now the Pope!!! What do?
Noah Nelson
Jackson Murphy
Cardinals, bring my the lineup of the day
Isaiah Walker
Release all priests from vows of chastity and end catholic pedophilia in one fell swoop. Go fuck some bitches, you dumbasses.
Matthew Ramirez
Yes, sir.
Jaxon Taylor
Have all the altar boys meet me in the shower
room...
William Carter
The pedophile priests rise against you, overthrowing you and establishing a religious precedent for child marriage
Christopher Moore
Time to bring back the good old days of orgies in the Vatican.
Nicholas Parker
Dissappear
Wyatt Gray
Learn to roll my eyes all the back in my head and keep them that way for extended periods.
When I give my big "pope speech" or whatever it's called...
>eyes rolled back
>mouth hanging open
>fully naked
>"I've seen the light, my flock. We've been lied to. The light bringer will be our salvation from the false god" or some other cringy faux-biblical shit
>be assassinated after unsuccessfully trying to troll the world into Satanism
Aiden Roberts
PAR-TAAYYYY!
Ian Martin
I hereby decree that all religion is fake and gay and that you should all feel bad about yourselves.
Bentley Long
Impossible, I am infallible!
Joseph Lopez
Eat all the eggs
Levi Collins
Unironically this. Orthodox priests can marry and they don't have nearly the problem.
Evan Miller
Renounce the papacy like every pope should
Carter Mitchell
Pope dance.
Matthew Gray
Call a news conference to announce that religion is a scam and aliens are real.
Adrian Mitchell
Buy more pointy hats
Henry Barnes
Smoke crack while fucking some whore doggy style as they reveal that I'm the new pope. I call it the Hunter Biden Surprise.
Caleb Harris
That makes no sense. Horny guy takes a vow of chastity...cant handle it ...need to cum so bad...
I would think his first options would be to fap, get a girlfriend on the sly, or just fuck a hooker. Messing with kids...you have to have an attraction to them.
More likely than not pedos were attracted to the clergy because people trusted them with kids. Same for scout leaders etc.
They don't let priests be alone with kids anymore, so problem is solved.
Oliver Harris
go live on international television and disband the Catholic Church. i'll say i had received a message from God, a miracle in my sleep, and he told me to tell the world that aliens are real, the bible is a fabrication, and the Church knew about it all along.
then i'd have a 20 year old sex worker give me sloppy toppy on livestream until i nut.
Isaac Thompson
Make head coverings for women in church mandatory again.
Bring back Latin Mass and Gregorian Chants.
Reunite with Orthodox Christians.
Jaxon Cruz
Based.