Are there any companies making printers that don't suck donkey balls? Surely somebody, somewhere...

Are there any companies making printers that don't suck donkey balls? Surely somebody, somewhere, has developed a product to meet the market demand for a printer that isn't a total piece of shit rip-off.

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I was just talking about this with some of my friends. Someone that made a printer that didn't suck mechanically and had libre drivers that worked cross-platform would probably get very rich

Pic related is the printer we had when I was a kid. Rarely had any trouble with it. Replacement ribbons were something like $5 at K-Mart. Printers now are nightmares. How did they get so fucked up?

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You think this fact just escaped all the printer companies? They all collectively derped and bet on $30 printers with $50 ink cartridges instead, and left a pile of money on the table?

it is much better to just buy the cheapest printer and not worry about ink prices because printing is done so seldomly
i say this after having bought two expensive printers with cheap ink/toner and they had problems all the time
bought the cheapest one i could find from target and not only does it work all the time the quality is much better

No, as the last user said, printer companies all figured out about 15 years ago, it's literally cheaper to give away printers for free then charge $50 per ink cart, especially if you make them with the chip jew and you can't refill. Printer technology peaked around 2005 or so and it's only been getting more bullshit since then. Nobody gives a fuck about printers because 100% of the time they are only used to interact with some kind of boomer, or government, which is also boomers. Nobody is going to ever make a good printer again because there's too many idiots and shitty businesses that throw them away for free on ad sites. Just find one that is old enough so it doesn't have the chip jew and buy refil packs, inject for carts, toner carts are supposed to have holes but if not you can drill your own. Everything else sucks.

the only legit reason to print is printing photos and that's better done by ordering them

the best printer i've ever owned is a Brother MFC-J435W. i've owned many printers, and thrown many printers into dumpsters, but this one has remained dumpster free for ... coming up on a decade now? it still has trouble staying connected to wifi, and its menus suck, but it has not required any physical maintenance. it does not have ink DRM - i buy dirt cheap multipacks of quarter-filled chinese ink which is happily guzzles down to print my shit, and it scans and copies just fine, and faxes if i want that shit.
their software is, of course, abysmal. so it goes.
it's connected to a pi which shares it over samba. problem solved.

>it still has trouble staying connected to wifi
sounds terrific

printers are printers, after all.
i've been happy that it's the only problem it has after the other printers i've had. i just have to have my pi restart its hostapd daemon before sending a print job so the printer sees the network appear and greedily reconnects. i suppose normally one would have to poke a button or restart the printer first.

We should just buy a new printer everytime the old one runs out of ink. Beat them at their own game. If you're into arduinos and such there are tons of interesting components inside an injet.

That being said, laser printers are mostly trouble free

>100% of the time they are only used to interact with some kind of boomer, or government, which is also boomers.
This. Printers are gay.
I shit you not, I routinely have people (government, insurance, doctor's office) still asking me if I have a fax machine? Fuck. 25 years ago, maybe. Can't you just send me a pdf?
Nope. The answer is always nope.

Yes.

I've had so much trouble using wifi with my printer that I just went and bought a god damn cord so I can direct connect. Problem solved.

Printer companies figured that out. new printers come with ink half full.

Yes, this. The "starter" ink carts as they call them, get you like, 20 pages or some shit. Ink is such a shit technology because it will just dry up by the time you want to use it, you either inject all the time for random little one off jobs, or just do the better option which is scout craigslist/facebook for idiot businesses throwing laser printers away.

IIRC if someone compromises your inbox and takes the PDF nobody gives a fuck.
If they fax it and someone intercepts it they get V& by the FCC

Get a plain brother b&w laser. USB connection. Screw WiFi. Toner will cost $20 and last 2 years before it goes bad (aftermarket; depends on use). The other replaceable part, drum, costs $30 and lasts 12000 sheets (aftermarket;depends on use). Printer itself costs $100. Also comes with toner which may last you awhile. Color printing is a joke. Only thing worthwhile to print in color is photos. Get those done cheaper and larger sizes elsewhere.

So I use the printer twice as fast. Thank God I don't need to print more than once or twice a year

If you only need to print a handful of times a year, the library is still unironically the best option, most still charge 10 cents a page

But then I wouldn't get the satisfaction of taking down big printer

Either get a laser, or have yours modded with a bulk feed system.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Continuous_ink_system