>Drunk as fuck in a bar
>I shat myself, but don't know it yet.
>One guy ask who wants a free shot.
>I said I do.
>He say he meant which of the girls he was with, wanted a shot.
>Fair enough, sorry for the misunderstanding.
>He calls me and say ''You know what, I'll give you the shot, if you answer my question''
>I agree
>He ask how old I am.
>I say 25
>He goes like ''Damn bruh, you're 25 and already balding, what a loser.''
>I ignore him and go take the shot.
>He stop me and ask if I shat myself.
>I'm like of course not (Because at this point I don't know yet that I shat myself.)
>He goes like ''Damn bruh, you're balding and you smell like shit, how can you expect to get a date.''
>I tell him I kissed a 19yo girl earlier
>Out of nowhere he start accusing me of pedophilia.
>He claim that if I go for 19 to 18 yo girls that means I'm a pedo and I'm going for the youngest I can legally go for.
>tell him that this is some bullshit, because In our country the age of consent is 16.
>HE claim that if I know the age of consent, that mean I'm a pedo.
>Drunk me still argue with him, I can't be a pedo because when I was 18 I took my 14 yo neighbor girl, to the movie, and I didn't have sex with her.
>He keep arguing that I must have rapped her.
>I'm like no I didn't
>Finally a bouncer came and told me I had to leave because I shatmyself.
>I claim I didn't but he ask me to prove it by shoving my own hand down my undies so I do and come out with a hand full of shit.
>I yell the loudest ''WTF!?'' out of surprise.
>Bouncer tell me it's allright because he'll just call me a taxi and that if the bar banned every one who drank too much, they wouldn't make any more money.
>I wait outside.
>He comes back later and tell me I'm banned because 4 patreons. (The bully and his friends) claimed that I'm a pedo. and that he would call the police if I ever come back
>I came alone so I had no one to defend me.
>The police found me passedout on a stranger's frontlawn at 10 am
I shat my pants in front of bar bullies
AHAHAHH thats what you get for trying to be a normie faggot
let me guess, he was nonwhite
I wasn't trying to be a normy, I was trying to get a free shot!
Should have shat their pants. Claim your territory
No, but I don't see how that's relevent
This is why I don't interact with normies. t. balding at 25
do'nt do shots
What would happen if you went back
this is such a LARP it isn't even funny.
This, none of it is real, especially the part where OP claims he'd kissed a girl before.
Drink at home, user. Drink at home. It's inexpensive, you're in your own safe environment and you don't have to worry about assholes fucking you up.
You can get snacks/food ahead of time.
Order take out.
Watch some entertainment & go on the web.
& Of you have an accident, you can hose yourself off & put on clean clothes.
>>He goes like ''Damn bruh, you're 25 and already balding, what a loser.''
I found this line hilarious, personally.
>Everything is larp
There is no such thing a something true on the internet.
Damn bruh, you're 25 and already balding, what a loser.
>Balding at 25
Feelsbadman.jpg
Jesus this story is just all around depressing
>I'm banned because 4 patreons. (The bully and his friends) claimed that I'm a pedo
Why does that matter in a bar? As if there's underage girls there for you to creep on
Im sorry you need to post some proof of this this is crazy
BASED.
Remember, be reckless and use everything you have to your advantage. Should've grabbed a handful of shit and thrown it at them. Chimpmaxxing is more underrated than you think.
How do you get so drunk so don't realize you shit your pants, but yet didn't blackout and remember this so clearly. Fake and gay