The only thing I desire in a relationship is to be wanted. Obviously it helps if I think the girl is attractive or is not a chore to talk to, but if I had to choose between a model and an "ugly" woman that can't live without me, I'd pick the latter. Of course I don't expect to get this for doing nothing, I'd take care of her, try to be the best for her.
I don't know, maybe it has to do with my very low self esteem but I see everyone talking about the perfect partner but I just want to feel desired and loved, I want someone to finally validate all the work I've put into not being a loser, uninteresting, fat retard. When I think about it I'm afraid this just makes me a manipulative narcissist that would only inflict pain on someone else that got close to me.
Am I sick ?
You are healthy in a sick world
I've been dating someone I'm not attracted to for almost a decade you aren't a weirdo for prioritizing personality over looks. It's called risk management. You want safety. You are human. Fuck us right? I mean I will have someone in old age. So yeah.
Yes. You're gonna end up disappointing anybody you start a relationship in your current state.
Girls who are capable of providing sincere love don't want to be with somebody who cares more about what they can get out of her (in your case, emotional validation) than who she is.
Best case scenario you end up with a gold digger who is able to act like she desires you.
Until your sense of self is strong enough for you to look outward at others, you can't expect a relationship with somebody who is able to look out at you.
I need sauce of that panel user.
I think it's from Himizu
what did he mean by that pic?
if you listen to the retards on the internet the only people who are "ready "for a realationship are the ones who don't give a shit about one at all in the first place.
But this kind of thinking is retarded.
People shouldnt waste time, energy or money on things they don't need.
If you ever magically grow out of wanting human companionship, I dont see a single fucking reason why you would turn around now and get a female companion.
>I think it's from Himizu
Thanks user
>People shouldnt waste time, energy or money on things they don't need.
And yet you are schitzo posting on Any Forums from a computer device.
that's where you are wrong bucko, I need to post on Any Forums
Well, in that case, godspeed, schitzo-chan.
you don't know what the word even means
The longer the fall the bigger the bounce
But I am you, schitzo-san-sama, if you know, then I know.
We are one.
Thanks for the replies, at least I know I'm not a complete retard for thinking about this
How do you achieve this when you think you're never good enough ? If I look back and see all the work I've put, I feel gratified. Then I look forward and see all the work I have left and I feel like a piece of shit. I can't wake up someday and have this state of mind changed overnight.
It means that writhing around desperate to get your needs met only alienates you from others and drives you deeper into desperation and despair
Gosh. You are a tool, but clearly not the sharpest...
There is a difference between "not giving a shit" and not being an emotional parasite on somebody you claim to love
>It means that writhing around desperate to get your needs met only alienates you from others and drives you deeper into desperation and despair
True, but the issue is that if my needs aren't met, it alienates me and drivers me into despair and self isolation.
My needs for human companionship have been ignored so much that I'm just going to go into hermit more and have no contact with the human world.
That is the million dollar question.
My opinion is that you have to try to unlearn the framework by which you're judging yourself first. Show yourself the kindness and benefit of the doubt that you want a partner to see when they look at you. If you make reevaluating your harsh judgements a habit, you will eventually get to a point where you feel safe and secure enough to be there for somebody else too.
The best way to make this a habit is notice when you are thinking something harsh or judgemental yourself or somebody else and imagine someone else saying that sort of thing to a person you love and assume the best of. Good luck, user. You are on the most important of journeys. It's a lot of work, but the rewards are incredible
Start by trying to give others the attention, patience, and compassion that you want from a companion. Most people will do their best to reciprocate
I have, and they don't. Which is why I'm tired, so tired of humans.
I Feel I need to cut all contact with humans so I can have some years to restore my faith in humanity.
But realistically if I hit hermit mode, then I don't see why I would ever would reestablish contact with people.