I just realized something deep dark and wrong with me - I'm not willing to work hard to achieve my dreams.
Somehow before today all my life it was always daydreaming and someone else fault. Genes pool, bullying, upbringing, lack of control due to lack of education, lack of education due to lack of money yada yada. It was all dead end circles but I could still blame someone else but myself. Maybe tomorrow, maybe different subject, maybe different programming language...etc. to put a number - 35 years like that.
I was trying to watch some lectures today so I can have that ***imaginary(unspecified) well paid office job*** that i always subconsciously dreamed of. And it's just too hard. For me. And i don't have it in me the will to fight trough it. And I can't blame anyone for it.
I finally did it lads. I sunt to rock bottom. And it was always me. I finally get it now it's fuck me.
It's not my fault. I worked hard, got a good career. I'm also working hard on bringing my dreams to life. But tfw no gf? Yeah, that's not on me, women just hate quiet nerdy men.
Eli Taylor
meditate nigga always has been fuck hookerzzzzz
Dylan Thomas
>psyops to get wizards back into wageslavery
Fuck you kike.
Robert Martinez
so... is picrel good?
Joshua Cooper
>always has been I swear they're trying harder and harder to pretend it's not. I've watched people sleep their way to their next promotion. I've seen nepotism at work.
Lucas Thomas
Classic Russian literature is usually good.
Eli Phillips
I worked hard to a point. What did me in was seeing that everyone else who was successful didn't try at all.
I would look to people I didn't know or interact with as inspiration, but it felt so distant. Meanwhile, everyone I knew irl who had success had it handed to them, and people who worked hard went nowhere.
There was also the realisation that I was extremely mediocre as a person. Most of the people I looked up to had some sort of latent talent they uncovered. I was probably built to be a textbook normie, but rather than realising that early and being content with it, I thought I was special.
Easton Robinson
>Somehow before today all my life it was always daydreaming Similar boat but I kept to blame balanced, 50% me 25% parents 25% society. More than daydreaming for me it was a sort of forcefully impossed, anxiety, future obsession. The present is too shit to bear, and so is the past. So I focused on the future without taking a real look at past and present. Needless to say, it was the most retarded and wasteful thing I could have done. Complete limbo. All that shit I tried to study, all that shit I tried to hoard. Completely worthless. All of it. I'm not trying to "restart" my life, I'm trying to start it.
It's so, so so so so painful. I have no words. But I'll keep trying for a bit longer.
>35 years Man you're kinda fucked aren't you. I realized that a bit earlier than you. It's probably over for both of us though.
Ian Hill
It's not my fault. There's nothing in this world that I want except for death. Simply thinking about faking a normalfag life makes my blood boil. If I could kill myself without hurting my mom, I would. Some of us just aren't gonna make it, probably weren't meant to in the first place.
Adrian Collins
I don't want to fuck prostitutes, I want a relationship.
Daniel Ramirez
What I'd recommend user is getting the hardest job (in terms of mental and temporal demand) you can find and working it for AT LEAST a year.
You need the discipline to be beaten into you and since you can't do it yourself, you should make your livelihood depend on it
Jonathan Baker
I remember when I was in my early twenties thinking it's too late, then mid 20,late twenties, 30, etc.
You know there a things that you need to achieve(i.e. being self sufficient adult). And even if it's later then sooner it's still needs to be done. Age is sort-off carved in stone whether you like it or not so you can no longer blame limbo on it.
Grayson Sanchez
discipline is good but you're suggesting a pointless one.
Isaac Anderson
>35 years like that Bullshit you ain't 35. This is a bait thread.
Joseph Fisher
I also used tinder today at this age.Yes I know other around my age already have soon to be teenagers kids. But you know - what choice do i have ? I still needs to be done. There's no other way around it.
Daniel Jones
>It's so, so so so so painful. I have no words. But I'll keep trying for a bit longer.
You need to catch a break. Whether God is that merciful is the question.
Ryder Jones
Then how did you come to the conclusion that it's entirely your fault? A chunk of it *is* your fault, but entirely? No, fuck that give yourself some respect.
Luke Kelly
Im a mediocre man, not good or bad enough to catch the people's eyes but just enough to be forgotten.
