30+ Thread

How's your relationship with your parents? Do you blame them? Do they blame you?

Any advice you want to give zoomers?

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continually growing resentment. i'm trying to get out of that mindset. she says i love you and feel nothing anymore. it's hard once you really deconstruct how physically and emotionally neglected you were as a kid. in my heart i still would prefer to have been aborted. i will never understand exposing a child voluntarily to a life of poverty and suffering. my father was never in the picture. he could die and i'd have no reaction.

>continually growing resentment
Does it ever subside?

A couple of bumps then I'll let the thread rest.

it could be worse
yes I blame them, they literally called me their guinea pig child and they raised my two younger siblings into functional normalfags

>guinea pig child
As a light-hearted joke?

If you're a young man on r9k right now, I have some advice for you as a 30 year ready to literally kill myself.

1. Do anything. Literally anything is better than nothing.
Even if wagecucking or getting turned down sucks, every life experience you go through teaches you something new. How to handle yourself, how to interact with people, how to cope with reality.

2. Doing nothing makes it harder to do something with each passing year.
If you're a neet that plays video games and shitposts all day, I did the same thing. I'm only 21, I'm only 24, I'm only 26... wait. The more time that passes, the more doing something no longer becomes a choice. You become maladjusted and will have a hard time getting your foot in the door literally anywhere. You might think you're choosing to be a neet now, but that choice won't be yours to make in the future.

3. You'll never have self confidence if you're not good at something.
Being good at something is the key to everything. It's the key to finding a job, which leads to financial freedom and no more feelings of being a burden, it gives you more worth in the eyes of others and they treat you better, that all leads to relationships and living your life. You need to find something that you're going to do to get good at. And if you're not sure, you've got to take your shot at something, see #1.

Stop living in escapism. Go to trade school, go to any post seconding program. Do anything and do it now. You'll have a hundred excuses as to why the economy sucks, you won't find a job after paying for courses, you think you're too stupid to achieve it, just fucking do it.

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I have a good relationship with my mother, my father passed away and wasn't in my life much when I needed a father figure. I don't resent either of them because I had a stroke of luck and turned out well even if I know I shouldn't have. My mother tried to be both disciplinarian and loving which ended horribly. She was incredibly inconsistent with rules as they were enforced zealously or not at all depending on her moods. I imagine it's like trying to teach a dog to not shit in the house by praising him for shitting on the floor and yelling at him when he shits outside for not doing it sooner. She was incredibly negative and nearly stunted me from ever climbing out through self-fulfilling prophecies by telling me I couldn't do anything right/won't finish anything I start/why bother. I lucked out big time I found a mentor that took a liking to me and all he had to do was recognize my talents and believe in me.

She doesn't blame me, she was just not the smartest at parenting. It's fun to ask her about times she beat me for no good reason like for throwing out an empty bic lighter and having her apologize and admit she was stressed out and needed something or someone to take it out on.

My advice for zoomers is to value accountability and integrity. I saw how my mentor handled himself in situations and I saw how by simply accepting and admitting his errors somehow everything turned out well, so I started doing the same. It's the single biggest turning point in my life is to accept blame, even if there are others with more blame than you. Simply accept fault for anything you did remotely wrong, apologize, and do better next time. When I was in the military I would sometimes break protocol and do things my way to be more efficient, but sometimes this backfires and something goes wrong. My superiors would call me in ready, but I'd just admit what I did and explain why and how I'd do it again if I didn't know better. They'd let me off the hook or with a little wrist slap.

30 as of last year. I long to create something. I have all of the time in the world to do so and yet my mind is a blank. The moment I start to start thinking critically I drift off and lose focus. It's too easy to fill the time with mindless dopamine instead.

Man Im on a dirty bed. When I wrote this a cat peeked in,
decided no. This house should be condemned. My mother caused all of this. She destroyed my father and my father destroyed me.

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