In case of a draft, there's a method of dodging that doesn't fuck you over. A lot of retards think they can get out of military service by claiming they hate niggers, Jews, faggots, or are disloyal to the US government. All this is going to do is get you sent to prison and to lose all of your gun rights. Or you'll just be used as cannon fodder.
However, there's a very high IQ way to get out of service. Ted Nugent did it, and it worked: >A week before, I stopped going to the bathroom. I did it in my pants. poop, piss the whole shot. My pants got crusted up... I was a walking, talking hunk of human poop... those guys in uniform couldn't believe the smell... they had a urine test and I couldn't piss, But my poop was just like ooze, man, so I poop in the cup and put it on the counter. I had poop on my hand and my arm. The guy almost puked. I was so proud.
Yes, it's that simple. You just have to PISS AND SHIT YOUR PANTS! >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
You won't be imprisoned for treason, nor will you lose your gun rights!
They'll just give you a medical exemption:
>Medical Conditions That Can Keep You from Joining the Military military.com/join-armed-forces/disqualifiers-medical-conditions.html >f. Anorectal >(2) Anal or rectal polyp, prolapse, stricture or INCONTINENCE... >Urinary System >c. Enuresis or INCONTINENCE OF URINE beyond age 12
That's all you need to do to avoid the draft, Champ. Just poop and pee your pants! Nobody likes a poopy-pants
Just remember this aphorism: >Poop + pee = no draft for me! It's so easy, you can begin practicing now Don't be a pussy incel >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
Not from America but you guys know there are 100 times easier ways to get out of draft wihout embarrassing yourself
Robert Richardson
Just say that you'll blow your brains out the moment you get your hands on a rifle.
Hudson White
nice way to be put in prison and lose your 2nd amendment >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
elaborate. remember: draft dodging is a crime punishable by up to 5 years in prison and $250,000 fines
Ayden Turner
You can fuck the heart examination by just getting a small DC battery to copacitor setup
Thomas Taylor
what happens when they catch you with the batteries? >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
Adrian Davis
I was going to call you a faggot at first but then I kept reading and saw the brilliance of it, it really is that simple. If you're reading this and you're a coward, just shit and piss your pants like OP says, peepee poopoo is the way.
find a better method to dodge the draft than: >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
Jeremiah Collins
Idk how the draft works. But if they do you can tell them your passionte in engineering so maybe you can get the back role as an arms rapairman or a technician
Dylan Moore
yeah, that's not how it works. they don't care what you want at all but nobody likes a poopy pants >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
Ryder Smith
I will use the method I saw in a movie. Dude just put peanut butter on his ass cheek. When people ask him if he's sane he just put his hand in his pant, grab the peanut butter and shove his whole hand in his mouth.
Anthony Taylor
Yeah. If you don't care about public image it is the best way. In Poland back when it was mandatory to go to the army the med scholl guys had a choice of staying in med scholl or doing military med school
Jonathan Williams
>it is the best way of course it is. it's mathematically proven >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
Brayden Price
somewhat related, I skipped the mandatory military service in my country by threatening violence/mayhem. I went all out, saying I was gonna rape guys in the shower, bring drugs in, shoot the person who gives me a gun, break the other recruits necks in their sleep, etc. Apparently they have to take threats like that serious to not get big doodoo on their hands, if it turns out I was serious. Maybe that or they just considered me too unstable and disobedient. Whatever it was, it worked. If any law enforcement entities read this I can assure you my post is an original work of fiction. I'm incapable of violence/mayhem and choose the way of the fren
im too obese to be sent into combat, unhealthy eating my ass
Nicholas Sanchez
Probably taking ADHD meds
Blake Perez
>taking ADHD meds not everyone can just be prescribed amphetamine also, they're not going to prevent you from going to war because of that >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
this will get you labelled a terrorist >Poop + pee = no draft for me!
Jason Murphy
maybe I could start using a trip and just post as I normally do but then show them like a weeks worth of my post history. they would stay far away from a twisted cycle path like me
Lincoln Gomez
I'm already diagnosed as autistic so turning up covered in shit will be an easy sell.
Nathan Peterson
Didn't happen. Its not mandatory here and I wanted to go but my parents didn't want me to go to the military. This is 3 years ago. Maybe somebody won't start another War after seeing Putin war. Very embarressing so far.
Tyler Lopez
>lose all of your gun rights Rights don't give me guns, guns give me rights.
