30+

i do work and pay bills, also i pay for my internet, food, gas, services, and hygiene products, the only thing i dont pay for is water service

ye you right, we meant to mate and pass the knowledge, i dont see me anywhere near having kids nor getting a gf, im ugly as fuck

30 here. Life's meaningless and I enjoy less and less stuff as I get older.

I never did want kids, as far back as I can remember. they don't inherently give your life meaning, in any case.

> they don't inherently give your life meaning
You use the word inherently a little too liberally. People mistake constant perpetual joy for meaning, so if a child doesn't give you constant perpetual joy, they act like it isn't inherently meaningful, as if struggling to raise a human right isn't what gives it the meaning.

struggling to raise a human right is something some people find meaning in, my point is that doing so is not guaranteed to be something you'll find meaning in.

Doing artwork has really given my life a lot of meaning. Try putting on your favourite music and doing some drawing and letting the creativity flow through you. It really helped me.

That's like saying you won't enjoy food just because it tastes good. You have to go out of your way to reject the sense of duty. you are mistaking meaning for pleasure or even just success.

No, I'm not. Duty only provides meaning if it's freely taken on, if it's a responsibility you volunteer for and actually want. If having kids automatically gave you meaning in life there wouldn't be so many shitty parents, and so many poorly-raised kids. It's downright easy to find people who are adrift in life and feeling OP's kind of ennui despite having managed to reproduce.

31 kv

how am i doing? im suffering, a lot. these days i have anxiety a lot. i dream a lot of a girl falling in love me, a young one. but alas, im dying alone

the worst is that i dont enjoy videogames. not world of warcraft, not diablo 2, not counter-strike, not dota. not anything, not even stupid gold games on ios which i was good at. before i could just escape with videogames, but now im constantly lovesick. lovesick to the point of being in bed all day. holy shit i suffer so much. lol its so pathetic

i started vaping nicotine again. it feels so nice. its SO nice. seriously. im almost sorry to anyone who doesnt know what nicotine feels like. it feels like someone is holding your hands. its so fucking addictive. everyday in my 5 month abstinence, everyday, without fail, i thought about nicotine

honestly, being around other virgins my age, who feel the pain i feel. who suffer in the same ways i feel. who express the same feelings i feel, is cathartic. even dudes from like 6 years ago i find on desuarchive, who just make throwaway comments about how i feel exactly. every single person in the thread insults them, ad homs. they seethe so much, but some of these guys i just connect with. i could only imagine how much suffering virginal dudes before the internet went through. dear lord they must of been so alone. atleast online you can know someone understand your pain, even if its just through a screen on a anonymous imageboard. you'd think this place of suicidal virgins is meaningless, but take it away, and see how much you appreciate being understood

Attached: 1568629312173 (1).jpg (900x900, 82.43K)

>Duty only provides meaning if it's freely taken on
that isn't remotely true, but even if it was it becomes a choice about accepting where you are and what's been put in your hands, it's still just rejecting something good despite its inherent meaning.

>that isn't remotely true
Why not? If it was, wouldn't it follow that, for instance, since many patriotic people volunteer for military service, that getting drafted would make you into a patriotic person?

>it's still just rejecting something good despite its inherent meaning.
if you assert that anything is inherently good or inherently meaningful then I reckon we disagree on first principles.

>wouldn't it follow that, for instance, since many patriotic people volunteer for military service, that getting drafted would make you into a patriotic person?
No, it wouldn't. At all. That's two completely unrelated things and having kids leading to meaning if you embrace it does not mean the same thing as becoming patriotic because you're forced to fight to the death in a war. One is literally the point of being an animal, to reproduce and to get your young out into the world as best as you can. the other is literally enslavement from an unrelated adult who wants you to die for their cause that doesn't have to have anything to do with you.

>if you assert that anything is inherently good or inherently meaningful then I reckon we disagree on first principles.
Yes, that is why I am correcting you, because you disagree and are therefore wrong.

I'm getting there. Finally got enough routine in terms of nutrition, workout and hobbies, aswell as quitting all vidyas that i actually think i might actually make it.

I'm still just shaking my head at what a dumb equivalence that is. Humans have intentions for existing, and that largely falls down to continuing the race. It is literally what we are programmed to do, to have kids and raise them. Doing this gives us a sense of fulfillment and meaning, even when it goes wrong, what you put into it still means something, it is the natural human response if you're not actively trying to run away from a sense of natural meaning.

We are not programmed for war, we are not born to fight in a war, being drafted into war does not bestow patriotism, it is not the same thing as meaning, and im not sure why you would equate the two.

Cattle and rabid zealots are not humans.

>i could only imagine how much suffering virginal dudes before the internet went through. dear lord they must of been so alone
Probably not because the rise of the internet coincided with the rise of isolated lifestyles.
Personally, I probably wouldn't have become an atheist without the internet, so maybe I would've become a monk.

well if you're not human then i don't really care what you think about all this, and your idiocy on the subject just doesn't surprise me.

>One is literally the point of being an animal
>It is literally what we are programmed to do, to have kids and raise them.
Asserting this is somewhat akin to denying your own sentience. It's one thing to say that bacteria are programmed to reproduce. They can't be said to have thoughts, let alone abstract ones, or even to really make decisions. They do indeed just do what they're programmed to do. Humans are not like that, the very thing that sets us apart from automatons is the ability to be more than simply blind slaves to biology.

>Animals have instincts for existing, and that largely falls down to continuing the race. It is literally what we are programmed to do, to have kids and raise them
>Doing this gives us animals a false, delusional sense of fulfillment and meaning, even when it goes wrong, what you put into it still falsefully means something, it is the natural animal response if you're not actively trying to run away from a sense of instinctive meaning.
Fixed you.

You sound awfully like some farm cattle.
Its unethnical to bring innocent soul into this hell, nor is to torture your own child with this awful, hellish existence.

>We are not programmed for war
Arguably we are, considering chimps engage in it.

>took self improvement meme
>got a wagie job
>lived poor and saved half my income to buy a house
>houses have gone up 400% and there's no way I can afford it

I'm going to smoke weed and play WoW now and wonder why I tried.

Attached: wojak.png (205x246, 7.19K)

Not every one is mindless slave to instincts like you.

>Fixed you.
Not very well though considering that different animals have different desires and needs. Many give birth and never see their children again or are prone to immediately treat them as an enemy. You want to pretend that humans are separate from animals, but were only as separate from them as they are from all the other species too. Trying to reduce the human need to raise children, to teach them right from wrong, from animals just trying to give birth and sometimes keep them alive is pretty stupid.

but that isn't surprising at this point.

>You sound awfully like some farm cattle.
No, that's just something a pretentious virgin would say to justify feeling superior about how pointless his life is.

>Its unethnical to bring innocent soul into this hell, nor is to torture your own child with this awful, hellish existence.
No, That's just something a pretentious virgin would say to justify feeling superior about how pointless his life is.

Chimps don't shit themselves as explosions go off and bullets fly by. We are programmed for aggression and conflict, but acting like that is the same as what humans engage in as war is pretty silly. The 'wars' studied in apes are closer to gang fights. And yes, physical confrontation is part of what makes a human feel balanced and meaningful, that doesn't mean we are meant to go die by the hundreds or thousands with technology designed to wipe out the lives of people.

>passive agressive tone
>ackshually...

you literally are though if you can't talk about those things without reducing them to that. if I was a mindless slave I wouldn't have the insight into why these things give humans meaning. What you've done is decided that anything humans are actually supposed to do is now 'animal' or 'mindless', and therefore nothing in life can have meaning to you. It's a very 12 year old atheist mindset to have. You on the other hand refuse to look beyond your instincts, and after a lifetime of being retarded, your only instinct is to double down on your retardation.

Not passive aggressive at all. You straight up aggressive and pretentious, so i threw it right back at you. in what way was I being passive at all?

do you know how stupid you are debating someone and then when you can't refute them you just say
>ackshually
as if that somehow erases their point? all you did was admit how wrong you are.

>eeek eeeeeek ooooook

Attached: 9468.png (1185x828, 376.95K)

>that doesn't mean we are meant to go die by the hundreds or thousands with technology designed to wipe out the lives of people.
Distinction without a difference. If we're programmed for aggression and conflict, what difference does it make whether we use fists and pointy sticks or rifles and nerve gas? It's still just killing people, a difference in degree, not in kind.