Dear Med-Anons, I keep telling a good friend he should go to a doctor (specifically a proctologist or gastroenterologist) after he confessed that he passes a considerable amount of bright red, oxygenated blood with every stool (see the attached image) and has been happening pretty much constantly for the past 6 months. It even leaks onto his bed sheets when he's asleep.
He's almost 40, fairly fit although he injects testosterone IM twice weekly and takes Minoxidil and Finasteride for hair loss. He's a total powder cocaine addict, getting through 4-7g daily. Also a fair amount of MDMA and cannabis. He's also a regular drinker of approx 6-8 units daily.
Otherwise, his diet seems to be pretty healthy. This can't just be a haemorrhoid can it, seriously? Any possible diagnosis from what I've told you and the image? He doesn't want to go see a doctor even though it's free in our country where we have free universal healthcare - so treatment for it would be free too. I think he's scared, as am I.
Wat do, friends. I want to scare him enough to get him to see a doctor, but not so much he thinks he's going to die any minute (which he might well do considering his lifestyle).
I've been with a few women in my life and one thing I've noticed is that the female anus is incredibly close to the vagina, in fact they're barely an inch apart.
I'm not sure about other guys - but doesn't this disturb you? It feel like a design flaw in women actually -- like they're supposed to be so feminine and beautiful yet this ghastly little oversight is ruining everything.
Somehow it feels to me that women should be more aware of this flaw and it should affect their confidence. Whenever I see a so-called beautiful woman walking down the street so care-free thinking she's all that I just remember her anus is only 1 inch away from her pussy and laugh her into oblivion.
Women: Please accept that they're too close together, let it negatively affect your confidence and so make yourselves more readily available sexually as a result. Afterall, we're having to sleep with a creature whos ANUS is only 1 inch away from the vagina --- you should not make this difficult. It's unappetizing enough as it is. We're doing you a favour.
Men: Do not let women forget this flaw, and do not forgive them for it. Remind them of it constantly less they get inflated egos and think they're all that
They're just too close together, sorry, but its true
Alexander Johnson
If he isn’t willing to go to a hospital maybe it’s because he’s aware of what it is. Which is 10 huge inner and outer hemorrhoids lining his anus.
Oliver Rogers
Totalbiscuit.gif
Adam Brooks
>He's a total powder cocaine addict, getting through 4-7g daily. Also a fair amount of MDMA and cannabis. He's also a regular drinker of approx 6-8 units daily. Hahahahahahahahahaha so much sage i could grow a garden
You should be fine Once you hit your mid 20s you’ll have the occasional blood shit You can blow some money on a check up but desu I wouldn’t worry about it
Logan Brown
Another fact I should add is that we're closer than brothers (no homo) and we never lie to each other. I've asked him and he's told me it's not haemorrhoids
Colton Flores
probably hemorrhoids. Should get em taken care of so they don't get infected. Or it's cancer and he's fucked.
Asher Barnes
He could have inner ones and not know. Otherwise his asshole is ripping for some reason? It’s not dark blood so it has to be right in that area.
John Howard
This isn't occasional, it's consistent for the past 8 months. And as I mentioned, we live in the UK where healthcare and treatment is free.
Zachary Baker
You’re going to have to wait until he drugs himself asleep and then expect his anus. It’s the only way. Bring lube and a rubber flashlight
Luis Cox
Well there's no way to know for sure until doctor checks "your friend's" asshole t. physician
Julian Butler
That's what I'm thinking. It's fresh and bright red so that's where the wound/weeping is coming from. If it was coming from further up his GI tract like varices in his oesophagus or ulcers it would be thick black melena. I'm shitting bricks, he's shitting potential something worse.
Angel Baker
hemoroids. Tell him to look it up because he'll become iron defincient with all that blood loss and his gainz are gonna vanish
Asher Wood
YNBAW!
Cameron Martin
>otherwise
he isn't healthy
Kayden Murphy
>Otherwise, his diet seems to be pretty healthy. I fucking lol'd
Ok guys I think the general consensus is that it's haemorrhoids which was my suspicion and a bit of a relief. I would fucking march him to A&E or insist he gets an urgent appointment with a GI consultant but he's ex-army and fucking stubborn as they come. Wish he had told me sooner but must've been difficult coming out and telling me at all.
I will try this just for good measure, thanks for the inspiration, user.
Daniel Murphy
After he gets his diagnosis you should confess your feelings for him
Zachary Gutierrez
>that much coke >with alcohol >with fin >with test Kek rip your "friend" Wonder which organ failed first
Luis Lee
Did he get vaxed? Vax can drop platelets and result in bloody stools.
Easton Brooks
Yeah not the ideal role model but he's severely battle-scarred and seen some real shit in Afghanistan, Somalia etc. So say whatever you want about him but he's my mate and I just want to help even if it's posting on Any Forums of all places. This guy commanded an artillery piece with a 100m kill radius so probably has more frags IRL than you do in CoD.
Nathan Miller
Yeah he's pushing everything past the limit but I can't stop him. I met him at a detox clinic of all places and he's worse now than when he went in there. We already have dude, we're brothers til the end. He's an anti-vaxxer so no.
Oh and you're gonna love this bit - he's a legit freemason.
