Resident Evil Village, but (You) are the main character

>Resident Evil Village, but (You) are the main character

What do you think would happen to you Any Forums?

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I would probably survive.

My jill valentine sex doll and i would brutally murder every single enemy

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I die immediately because I'm not a mold man.

I would fuck all the hot waifu vampires, by force if needed, and at the end they'd gang up and kill me brutal followed by feasting on my corpse. Thus is life.

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Can't even survive a skiptrain

I would try to fuck my hot wife, Mia, then probably get killed when it turns out to be Miranda in a skin suit

die

Die, probably. I'd get slapped by one zombie or be dramatically flung through a door and just lay there and go "Fuck it, have at me."

I'd end up being kept as a sex slave by the Dimitrescu daughters.

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Man that's...saucy

I don't know, I never played the game.

I will masturbate with the blood water in lady dimitrecu pool.

>implying we wouldn't be the exact kind of prey they kill

Ethan has his regeneration bullshit, I'd fucking bleed out at the first injury. If I did have his regen, maybe I'd have a chance, and I'd side with the goofy retard with the hat.

Marry, fuck, kill

Id die from dehydration from cooming

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>game begins
>walk up to Mia
>"listen Miranda i know that's you pretending to be my wife and that's fine, you can use my daughter for your ritual but in exchange I want to marry Lady Dimitrescu's daughters. Yes all of them. Deal? Okay let's go because the BSAA is gonna is closing in as we speak"

That's why Chris didn't tell Ethan the plan.

Cassie would capture me and proceed to make these faces at me.

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>You are in so much trouble, young man. You are never leaving this castle. Time for you to take responsibility

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Now that would be a nightmare.