What's your favourite Crusader Kings memory/story anons?

I started the slavic church in my merchant republic as grand price. Ended up losing re-election as grand prince and becoming just the leader of the slavic church with one county. Somehow, inheritance became open elective. When my guy died, I was playing as a lowborn

>Start 769 for the vision of England I will make reality
>Immediately borrow 300 gold from the j*ws
>J*ws expelled
>Marry into the Karling line, bros with both of Kings of West and East Francia
>Charlemagne never turns into a chad so family reunions are kinda awkward
>Karloman just kinda sits there seething eternally
>Fast forward through 150 years or so and my vision is finally within my grasp
>My warrior king honorable chad has the opportunity to forge England
>But the years have not been kind
>One of most renowned warriors in all the land
>Routinely btfo'd any brainlet dumb enough to 1v1 on the battlefield, duel or otherwise
>Have many sons, make my wife a factory for my seed to spread throughout the known lands beyond England
>Surprisingly this is not what became my downfall
>I train my firstborn in the ways that his father long before him, in battle and in the mental steel needed to rule
>My chad king lives well into his 80's being a hermetic monk as a hobby
>good buffs
>For all his strength, for all his prowess and his victories, the pale horse cares not
>didnt forge England because at the point of death the prestige and effects were considered "extra"
>This didnt destroy me either the son had big shoes to fill but not 3/4 of the kingdom wanted to kill him so this is fine
>Never quite step out of the shadow of his father but in times of peace, made the land prosper
>My firstborn son comes after many failures or daughters as you might call them
>rejoice for the future king has come
>Actually impressed by brawny trait, quick etc
>fuck yeah, going to smash scotland with my future king
>event pops
>your son has been in an accident and has unfortunately become an "imbecile"
>nononononono
>just dont know whether to laugh or cry at my son having the most retarded events pop
>secondborn son arrives
>turns into strong AND genius as they grow up
>Wulf (brainlet retard) and Karl (the one that should have ruled) actually get along

1/2

>Their father grows weary of the shit eater destined somehow to rule the land one day
>if this wasnt bad enough
>Wulf has discovered he is "homosexual"
>Their father decides Wulf needs to die
>this is beyond blood, the kingdom shall not be ruled by a man who had one finger in his nose and another in a mans ass
>this turbo retard will not die despite 178% chance somehow as he gleefully skips through the mud unawares as per usual
>Karl becomes like his grandfather
>the signs are all there he is the one meant to rule
>hire even the most petty maid to increase chance something like 200% chance now
>i get my chance alright but it fails and now i am in disgrace
>Karl, oh Karl he fought valiantly but couldnt predict that dice roll dictate Scotland catch the great fucking pox
>Karl fights but succumbs to the enemy within him and his dick
>my peace king is broken, disgraced, stressed, depressed and probably suffers a stroke in his sleep at 58
>King Wulf now takes the throne
>the entire kingdom collectively passes a kidney stone at the hearing of this news
>King Wulf is unbothered, has more important things to do like play with the dogs in the mud
>The list of people that have plots against me go from a handful to a longer list than a medieval j*w's ledger
>King Wulf is unbothered by this, has more important things to do and peasant boys to plow
>I somehow have to keep this retard alive long enough to have a 16 year old son
>it gets worse
>My uncle flips his shit refuses to see the kingdom go to shit, quite literally it seems
>revolts, revolts everywhere
>failed (multiple) monthly assassinations on Wulf's life
>The coffers are drying faster than Wulf can clap a peasant boys cheeks
>what do I do
>cant join any orders for buffs, everybody hates me
>Wulf enters a dark tavern with a follower revealed to be apart of none other than Lucifer's Own
>Lucifer even accepts retards into his embrace apparently
>this is the beginning of the end

2/3 i swear

>>this is beyond blood, the kingdom shall not be ruled by a man who had one finger in his nose and another in a mans ass
KEK

>my power increases greatly as I sacrifice anyone that remotely looks at me the wrong way
>i disgrace my forefathers but regain control like they had but corrupted, tainted and shit smeared on Wulf's dick
>my wife seems to think twin daughters is acceptable
>one disappears and my power greatly grows
>Glitterhoof provides valuable consultation as always
>Wulf descends futher into man pussy and madness
>demon child event comes and goes and the little shit just ends up leaving and conquering France or something idk
>Wulf does what entertains Wulf
>a plague like youve never fucking seen sweeps the land
>we must shut the gates
>they arent trapped out there, youre trapped in here with Wulf
>Wulf discovers a taste for human flesh and enjoys it greatly
>another daughter, another disappearance
>I discover my wife eating the pantry out to shit out more daughters
>I didnt like the chicken anyway but you look tasty
>relation scores everywhere -100 is now a regular day if it isn't probably a Lucifer's Own member
>and even they think Wulf is vile
>I eat my last daughter because at this point im the gay grandmaster cannibal who cares
>I marry some slampig of mild birth
>letsjustpumpasonpleasegod.jpg
>there is hope as Alfred is born but now 16 years before I can be free
>i will not suffer the sins of his father
>wulf gets sick probably from mixing blood, shit and ass in the same evening
>alfred is 10 now not long just survive whatever the fucking your vomiting is
>my mystic doctor comes to me and says he has searched far and wide for a cure and has the answer
>screams in my face and smashes a jar of bees in my room
>wulf survive many things but never was a bottom but the bees did not care
>Alfred conveniently "steps" on a shaky balcony at the young age 15

and thats why you should double down on killing homosexuals and j*ws Any Forums it was a curse from laughing at their taxed cursed gold.

Obligatory.

Attached: trust-nobody-not-even.jpg (642x414, 72.41K)

>first playthrough as a german CHAD
>no idea what was going on, still learning the mechanics at the time
>send my daughters off to the french because no one would accept matrilineal marriages
>two decades later realize my grave mistake
>lose all my territory
This is why I do incest only runs bros, I'm too retarded for diplomacy.

>Playing agot mod
>Start off with house Arryn
>Second child comes out as child of destiny
>kill off first born
>Proceed to conquer the seven kingdoms and became king
>no dragons to stand in way so it was easy conquest
>Got the young falcon title

I don't play often,so the story was not too crazy. It was definitely one of my favorite play through.

Attached: Arryn.png (406x443, 60.96K)

Council power is for cucks and weak men if there were definitive pictures for ck2 terms like "slippery slope" starts with allowing them a mere crumb of power and always ALWAYS disallow inheritance passing outside the realm

>formed HRE starting as a count in swabia starting in 867
>trying to dismantle the princely election so I can put whoever I want as the heir to the crown
>Still haven't married yet
>One of my cousins tries seducing me
>Why not? She has good traits anyways I can legalize the bastard if we have a kid.
>My cousin's twin sister also starts trying to seduce me.
>Why not she also has good genes.
>Between banging both twins end up having a bunch of kids between them
>invite the both of them to my court so they don't get married off and to prevent the kids from
>turns out one of my cousins has ties in england
>legalize the bastard, since everyone is terrified of me they all vote for him as the heir
>inherit england, the entire HRE, and various other lands just because my cousin(s) decided to fuck me.
>Never even got married, just kept banging both of my cousins until death.
Always remember to make your dynasty expand far and wide for the free land bros.

Am I supposed to manage the eugenics of my councilors families too?

in another save these actions caused everything to fracture and break

Definitely got lucky there, probably one of the few times that having an election was super helpful.

Attached: HRE.jpg (1920x1080, 850.21K)

My favorite is the memory of this game before they ruined it with shit dlc and freelc mechanics and features