Any Forums Plays NovelAI

Time for text adventure kino, just like the AI Dungeon threads of the past.

You can use Do (an action), Say (has your character say the input) or Story (direct insertion to the story text vertabim). If you want to use one of these specifically, then say so in the post as follows:
>DO: Flip off the monster
>SAY: "I'm your prom date, you ugly sack of shit."
>STORY: Two years worth of semen made a glopping noise as it flowed endlessly into Asuna.
If you don't specify I will pick whatever is appropriate

Prompt in the next post

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1, 4, 7 or 0 determines inputs.

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>Take a torch from the torch-lit path.
Might come in handy.

>DO: Knock on the door and say "Pizza's here!"

For the sake of getting the ball rolling I'm taking these

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> No creature that rejects the perfection of pizza is deserving of life. Kick down the door and cut down the apostate.

If there are no posts in five minutes which have the right no. I'll take whatever the first reply is
Bad news for us, the goblin is a tank

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offer goblin a slice of pizza to quell the situation

> Jam the business end of your torch in the goblin's face and burn the shit out of him.

Do: Shit yourself to disgust the enemy

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Do: piss your pants and cry

Do: Pray they slip and fall on your feces

> Raise your shield and ready your sword. Charge into battle against the Goblin Hoard.

Do: Wipe your blade with the feces to add poison damage. Face goblins with the Shit Slasherâ„¢ held high.

They're making fun of us

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Seconding this

>Do: Begin to cry as mom's spaghetti spills from your pockets

Do: Ignite the shit on the wall with your torch, then get the hell out of there.

> Try not to cry. Hold onto your dignity.

What a shitty story.

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Story: An ancient memory resurfaces. You hear the chants of your schoolyard chums: "Shitty legs, shitty legs!"

Do: Succumb and enter the Shit Dimension

>
Say OH SHIT!

> Propel yourself onwards via a series of extremely powerful farts.

Seconding

Convert the shit on your legs into a Shit Waifu with magic, then let her carry you