I was playin' this vidyagame the other day, "Bioshock" it's called. It's about a- a bunch of white people decide they had enough. Went and built a whole city underwater! Where they can do drugs and, I dunno, listen to Sinatra and shit. Guess they figured that colored folks weren't going to swim down there.
And as I was playing I realized something, they were right, there's not a single black person to be seen in Rapture. Not one brotha! Not even any busboys, or maids, or jazz musicians. You'd think they'd employ at least some house niggas.
But then I remembered, wait a sec. Black folks, we already got our own underwater city. A city built below sea level, all for us. And they called it New Orleans
>I watched… I watched General John McGrew in a press conference. And this motherfucker had all the media gathered, and this nigga literally, literally asked the media to their face to stop finding shit out.
>And then… I’m not making this up. This motherfucker grabbed the podium, he goes, “The spread of the Knox Event infection is now total.” And I was like, “Holy shit, man. You ain’t supposed to tell us that, bro.” That’s bad leadership. As a parent, you think I’m gonna sit my kids down, “Hey, little man, come here real quick. I’m gonna holler at you for a second. Yo… there's a crowd of infected tearing through town, nigga, and I am worried. Very worried. Go on, go to school and have a productive day. I was just thinking out loud. Getting some shit off my chest.” I’m like, “What the fuck are you doing, bro?”
This is very well written. I actually would expect him to say that.
Henry Taylor
post the george lopez version
Lucas Thompson
Kek
Robert Jackson
>It's about a- a bunch of white people user......most of those characters are about as white as the hand rubbing executives telling rappers to be edgier.
Nathaniel Wood
What would Dave play in his free time? Surely he’s at least played Donkey Kong or some shit
>Mfw I cried replaying Bioshock during the first glimpse of Rapture.
Charles Sullivan
People have been recommending me those games, those uh, "visual novels," you know? And I came across one called uh, "Hatoful Boyfriend," and you know what I said? I said, "No thanks, that game is for the birds!"
HEY so ahhh, this whole internet thing has got me really stressed out. I go on the internet, and there's these FUCKIN'... I don't even know how to describe 'em. They call each other INCELS, ha ha, that's how fuckin' pathetic these people are.
But they fuckin stress me out man, cos when I'm like, tryin' to talk about some shit, you know in like a forum or whatever, these CUNTS, these fuckin ANIMALS are THERE, TYPIN AWAY, OH it's brutal.
I can take abuse, y'know, I mean look at me. Look at my red, ginger fuckin face and tell me I can't take some shit. But when RETARDS, FUCKIN... ARRGH! Some stupid CUNT is just like, he's sayin' "implying you're not a newfag," THAT'S WHAT HE SAID TO ME! IS THAT EVEN ENGLISH? And this fuckin NERD even made his, all his text go green like he's some fuckin' computer hacker! I was scared he was gonna hack ME! And MY SHIT!
All I wanted to do was talk about my Breaking Bad shit on the internet. PLEB! THAT'S IT, that's what they called me, fuckin' PLEB! THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?
>Bioshock, it’s called >Went and built a whole city underwater! >You’d think they’d employ at least some house niggas Based Dave enjoyer, you got his inflection down perfectly
Because I could relate to the folks who built and populated Rapture during the intro. Also the game is pretty good and I have fond memories playing It.
Jason Torres
him trying to decipher rittenhouse and 'furbies' already goes beyond what you're trying to say there, you're too late
Gavin Powell
>tfw fell for Atlas's shit because he was talking in an irish accent I will nwver trust a fellow mick again
AYYY MANG. So the other day I was playing this videojuego called bioshock. It's about a bunch of Gringos who decided that they had enough. They built a whol e city underwater! Were they can do drugs and listen to Bing Crosby and shit. Guess they figured beaners weren't going to get their backs that wet!
And as I was playing I realized they were right, there's not a single Mexican in Rapture. Not one beaner! Not even any farm workers, or maids or construction workers! You'd think they'd at least employ a Mexican to mow their grass!
But then I remembered, wait a sec. Beaners, we already got our own underwater city. A city built below sea level, all for us, and they called it Puerto Rico!
New Orleans is literally below sea level and a famous hurricane drowned 1000 nigs in 2005
Angel Thompson
I know it in my bones, he flicked kids in the back of the ear at family events. I know he did. I'm not judging him for it or anything, I just know he did it.
Ryder Morris
Lol
Chase Morgan
greatness achieved. you're a professional.
Sebastian Ortiz
I go to Atlanta once in awhile for a vacation. It's actually full of pajeets.
Levi Lopez
Do you read this in his early standup/chapelle show chipmunky voice or his older raspy voice
Adam Garcia
great thread
Ryan Hughes
As the white guy he'd play on his show. Chapelle is in the front row and the camera cuts to him laughing a bunch. Then it goes too far and becomes a Will Smith Chris Rock parody. Chris Rock is playing himself in 1 camera shot, but it isn't advertised.
