What's The Appeal?

I legitimately don't understand. Never liked this series even as a child.
>First games are just boring platformers
>Jump on stuff for combat
>Dogshit art style made for literal toddlers
>Nonsensical themes, mushrooms, turtles, dinosaurs, italian plumbers, wtf
>Bing bing, wahoo
I hate it.

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wholesome without adhering to modern trends

it's also not subversive nor ironic, it plays things straight

Ok?
What the fuck were you playing in 1985 that was so gritty and realistic? Fucking Zork?
Also
>I don't like it
>Therefore it has no appeal to anyone and if they do like it they're wrong
Great argument

No RPG elements getting in the way of real gameplay. No boring numbers getting in the way of problem solving for immersion. It's great.

It's kind of weird how hard it is to answer a question that is seemingly obvious. It almost feels like bait.

I never said it didn't have any appeal to anyone. I asked what it was. Can you fucking read?

The good ones are well-designed. Some of the more recent ones are stale but that doesn't detract from the good ones.

i want peach to rape me

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This is bait and I refuse to believe it isn't.

Yeah, I only play mature games for mature games like me, with lots of guns and swearing and blood and tits, and lots of brown and grey.

Grr. Me man. Me have to do manly things. Me have to prove me strong. Grr!

Fun things are fun.

Yes. And?

Me must compensate for feelings of inadequacy! Me hit people, make me feel strong! ME STRONG! GRUG STRONG! GRUG AM BEST GRUG! UNGA BUNGA!

The reverse psychology isn't working. You know what makes a man a man? He does manly things. Thinking that playing childrens games proves your comfortable in your manhood is cope. You play childish games. Therefore youre childish. It's like some dumb feminist thinking that letting his wife put a dress on him makes him a real man. It doesn't.

*CLUB*

NO USE BIG WORDS! MAKE GRUG HEAD HURT!

GRUG ANGRY! GRUG GOING SCREAM AND HIT THINGS UNTIL WORLD AM WAY GRUG WANT IT! GRUG SCARED! GRUG NEED CONTROL! GRUG NEED FEEL SAFE! UNGA BUNGA!

What's the appeal you ask?

>First games are just boring platformers
No they're not, they're genre defining and highly playable to this day.

>Jump on stuff for combat
As opposed to grind and craft for hours for combat? Either approach is fine, but the Mario kind is more immediate and honest.

>Dogshit art style made for literal toddlers
Series is so old it's shuffled trough a lot of different art styles. I myself prefer the more analog, hand drawn style of past titles, but overall it's a common theme of keeping it clear and recognizable in order to keep a brand that's become iconic, well, iconic. Mario is Coke and Pepsi at this point, bigger than Jesus.

>Nonsensical themes, mushrooms, turtles, dinosaurs, italian plumbers, wtf
Yeah, light, whimsical, inviting and to the point. Like John Carmack said: “Story in a game is like story in a porn movie, It's expected to be there, but it's not important.”. The series has always been gameplay first, which should be expected of most well designed games.

>Bing bing, wahoo
Name another video game series as irremediably recognizable by its onomatopoeia

>You think putting on women's clothes makes me less manly and more feminine?!
Yeah.
Not sure why being big and strong is associated with being dumb either. There's a large correlation between physical fitness and intelligence.

GRUG STRONG! GRUG STRONG! GRUG STRONG! GRUG STRONG! GRUG STRONG!

Like I said, childish.
This answer I can respect. Thank you for answering my question.

it's game that is fun to play

better for it to be childish than pure dogshit

>Bing bing, wahoo
What a way to completely ruin your opinion.

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story in movies isn't important either, first and foremost they should look cool