The Guardian reviewing Elden Kino:

Ubisoft has been on life support for years.
This isn't going to affect them either way, because nobody gave a fuck about Horizon to begin with.

Coping this hard

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I doubt... you could even imagine it.
>See a bunch of Skeletons guarding a corpse, kill them and find a Poisonbloom in that corpse.
That which commanded the stars.
>See a bunch of Poison Mushrooms guarding a corpse, kill them and find an Arteria Leaf in that corpse
Giving life... its fullest brilliance.
>See a bunch of Wolves guarding two corpses, kill them and find a Glowstone and a Golden Rune (1) in those corpses.
THE ELDEN RING!!!
>See a bunch of Bats guarding a corpse, kill them and find a Golden Rune (1) in that corpse. Exact same thing happens less than 5 minutes later.
OOOOOHHHHH, ELDEN RING!!!
>See a bunch of Highwaymen guarding a chest, kill them and find 5 Mushrooms in that chest.
Shattered...
>See a bunch of Demi-Humans guarding two corpses, kill them and find 3 Ruin Fragments and a Large Club in those corpses.
By someone...
>See a Giant Miranda Flower and a bunch of small Miranda Flowers guarding two corpses, kill them and find an Immunizing Cured Meat and a Golden Rune (2) in those corpses.
Or something...
>See a bunch of Demi-Humans guarding a corpse, kill them and find a Hefty Beast Bone in that corpse.
Don't tell me... you don't see it...
>See a bunch of Demi-Humans guarding a corpse, kill them and find Crab Eggs in that corpse.
LOOK UP AT THE SKY!
>See a Big Land Octopus and a bunch of small Land Octopuses guarding a corpse, kill them and find a Golden Rune (1) in that corpse.
It burns...

>And Melina IS the ugliest level up waifu in the series
you take the back, you sumbitch

Yes, thanks!

Sorry sweetie, it's a cultural phenomenon. Smash bros has been dethroned ;)

>It is NOT hard enough
How about stop using summons, the laser beam sword and magic you fucking retarded bitch? Also you saying souls was all about d00d these games are so hard proves how much of a newfag you are.

You missed
>Massive environment with a large variety of biomes, hand crafted and not just procedurally generated trees
>Rewarding exploration for going off the beaten path
>Not locked in to linear progression
>Quest lines that actually go somewhere and don't handhold you

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>Different looking environments where you grab crafting materials from mobs
>Rewarding exploration with 1 Golden Rune (2) and a Glowstone
>You can look for mobs guarding crafting materials in any order you wish

>videogame journalism

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>an-unrivalled-masterpiece-of-design-and-inventiveness

ROFLMAO

unsupportable. not even going to read it to see the badly reasoned arguments

>hand crafted flat ground with prefabs sticking out of it
wowww

>Westernoids
they wont

the horizon dev team is literally raging about elden ring on twitter to the public because nobody wanted their shitty game knowing elden ring was on the horizon.

And you know, everything else you're purposefully ignoring

link

Globohomo journals giving Elden Ring full marks and declaring it the best game ever made, because it's the perfect distraction from the reality their handlers are destroying, custom crafted to ensure maximum time wasted.
>meds
No

why is elden ring being so overrated by everyone? it's not a bad game by any means, but people pretending as if it's a masterpiece is really confusing

>tweet was deleted
>twitter account is now protected
lol

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i cant find it or link it, i just saw a photo. i dont have a twitter so i cant go find it myself, but im sure there is more.

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A liberal homosexual feminist Jap was teaching a class on Hidetaka Miyazaki, known hack.

”Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Fromsoft and accept that The Lands Between is the greatest fantasy setting of all time even greater than Arda!”
At this moment, a brave, patriotic, British WW1 veteran who had served 1500 tours of duty on the Somme and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all decisions made by Butcher Haig stood up.

”What are the gameplay differences among the past seven Fromsoft games?”

The arrogant nip smirked quite jewishly and smugly replied “Each game is completely different, you stupid gaijin”
”Wrong. It's the same game remade over half a dozen times, and is advertised as such. Even George Martin himself referred to Elden Ring as a Dark Souls sequel. Where is Tenchu?”

The From shill was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Elden Ring. He stormed out of the room crying those Japanese crocodile tears. The same tears Japanese (who today live in such luxury most can afford multiple body pillows) cried when Hiroshima was bombed. There is no doubt that at this point our Jap-faggot wished he had pulled himself up by his bootstraps and become more than a garbage rehash consoomer. He wished so much he could die a glorious death in battle, but he knew deep down he would never be a white man!

The students applauded and became Tolkien fans that day and accepted the Pope as their Lord and Master. A giant eagle named “Thorondor” flew into the room and perched atop the flag of Gondor and shed a tear on the White Tree. The Return of the King was played in co-op several times, and Shazam himself showed up and handed out free Big Gulp sodas across the universe.

The Jap was fired the next day and sunset found him squatting in the grass, groaning. Every stool was looser than the one before, and smelled fouler. By the time the moon came up he was committing sudoku in brown water

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Give me something vaguely approaching the density and amount of content of Eden Ring then because for the last decade I was bored out of my mind by this shit industry.

Imagine you're in an industry
If your industry is very successful, that's good for you
If your industry is taken seriously, that's really good for you
You see that someone is being agreed upon in the shadows as being better than it really is- the signs are obvious
So you agree too
Because now Thing Matters
now Industry Successful

Fuck off from Any Forums if you don't like video games, also meds.

How is he wrong? ER's quest is literally go there kill that copy pasted miniboss. Literally the same thing you mouthbreathers always moan about. And muh exploration my ass, an area will only have about 4 copy pasted dungeon with slight design variation.

>masterpiece of inventiveness
It's the same game for the fifth time. Good, maybe, but what the fuck exactly is inventive about it?

Holy cope, play the game instead of watching garbage streamers rushing aimlessly in limgrave. You're missing out on the GOTD (game of the decade).

>And muh exploration my ass, an area will only have about 4 copy pasted dungeon with slight design variation.
are dungeons the only thing that constitute exploration in a game for you? you a big botw babby just because it had 200 copy-pasted dungeons?

>ER's quest is literally go there kill that copy pasted miniboss
tell me you havent played elden ring without telling me you havent played elden ring.

The world, the art, designs, and the vastness of the game which isn't killing the quality of the content like in most stupidly large open worlds where the same five elements are copy pasted everywhere?

some of you are living in a fantasy world re: elden ring open world

go play genshin impact for fuck sake. ER isn't even competitive with the height of the genre.

>It IS just dark souls 4
newfag

>ER's quest is literally go there kill that copy pasted miniboss
Laughable, I don't think a single boss is repeated outside of the completly optional mini-dungeons

The world map having cool shit to find does not negate the padding between the cool shit worth a damn.

*Inhales*
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*uninhales*
WEEEEEZZZ
I can't take this guy seriously

>does not negate the padding between the cool shit worth a damn.
What padding?

You fight variations of the Tree Sentinel like four times.

>Laughable, I don't think a single boss is repeated outside of the completly optional mini-dungeons

Laughable indeed. Especially when you start seeing them for the third and fourth time.

>Tree Sentinel
There is literally only one Tree Sentiel you have to kill and it's the Draconic one, did you even play the game or just watch footage?

...

only 1 of them is required

>go play genshin impact for fuck sake. ER isn't even competitive with the height of the genre.
youtube.com/watch?v=Fz-_c8SEZo4

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>What padding?

the entire open world map

all they did with this is take a souls game and move the interesting parts farther away from each other, filled with low quality grinding. this game moved the series back, not forward

>It's just optional, bro
>Just skip it
Why do people continually say this as if it's a defense of the game and not an indictment?