Warhammer 40k

The two "Steve Jacksons"

Orks are blacks
Tzeentch are jews
Slaanesh are gays
Nurgle are indians
Necrons are you because you sleep all the time you lazy faggot.
Tyranids are also you because you're fuckin fat lol

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Could a Fren explain the games themselves? Fuck lore. Why are there like a billion games in the series?

It's really shit, but fun.
I love the lore, but it's terribly written most of the time.
The plastics are expensive, most of the games are shit.
The hobby is multifaceted but all avenues lead to the sewers.
I still love it though.

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>tfw there will never be a game set in Commorragh where you either join up in a kabal, enter the service of an incubi temple, gladiatorial rings, or haemonculi coven
>tfw there will never be a game where you play as Konrad Curze and wipe out the gangs of Nostramo

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There are a billion factions and subfactions, so why not?
Just play the first dawn of war and it's expansions, you can skip the rest.

Warhammer is retarded and the fan base is even worse

The deeper you get into it, the worse it is.
Just play highly-rated vidya and read lore-babby-tier books like Caiphas Cain and Gaunt's Ghosts.
You'll enjoy it more.

Also read Deff Skwadron if you have any interest in Orkz.
Actually, fuck it, read Deff Skwadron anyway!

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you know when someone argues with you in vs debates how "nuh uh this setting has even bigger and stronger things than yours!" are said by some people? 40k is that setting, it was once supposed to be satire but people took it too seriously.

youtube.com/watch?v=O7hgjuFfn3A

the models look cool and are alot easier to paint than it looks, don't get into the lore though, the lore is shit
also they only have two good videogames and they're mechanicus and dawn of war 1

Bump.

Ok, so Conan the Barbarian gains insane wizard powers and lives to 30k. He took over the world using genetically enhanced troopers, then killed them to make better ones to take over the galaxy against space elves, space orcs, space weebs, and the 4 horsemen of the hellraiser. Conan then genetically makes 20 superbeings he calls his kids, but the cenobites took them, slung them all over the galaxy, and gave them all quirks. They all grew up weird, most came back to Conan, then half betrayed him, most died in civil war, and now space marines are trying to survive from aliens and corrupted humans.
I fucking tried in the shortest way possible.

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GW's shifted to selling the IP to whoever can pony up the cash. Here's some of the better ones:
>Dawn of War Series
RTS's with a focus on direct battle over build order and base building. 1&2 are great, 3 is controversial and MOBA like.
>Space Marine
3rd person action shooter. Really fun, makes you feel like a giant unstoppable warrior plowing through enemies.
>Mechanicus
X-com lite adventures of Tech Priests exploring a giant tomb filled with traps and killer robots. Turn based, really well written, really fun.
>Battlefleet Gothic: Armada
huge slow space ships blast each other in space. Never played it but it looks very cool. Lots of managing attack wings, coordinating fire, etc.
>Armageddon
Turn based grand battles. You command Imperials against a huge Ork horde in various scenarios. Old school, pretty fun. My main complaint is that by the endgame you just want an army of Titans and tanks because all your infantry dies in a single round o f shooting.

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This, I'm getting pretty addicted. The more I read the more I want. But it's really cringe at times.

Tabletop is for model collectors that want a purpose to their collections.
RPGs are for when you want DnD with more guns and bodies.
Dawn of War is for dangerously cheesy levels of camp in an admittedly good RTS.
Space Marine is for when you want a beefy power fantasy that is cut short when shit gets serious late game.
Deathwing is when you want some 40K in your Left 4 Dead.
Freeblade is when you want tome 40k on your phone.
Battlefleet Gothic is for naval warfare in SPAAAAAAACE!
Hired Gun is when you want 40K in your EYE.

Everyone needs to stop posting shit opinions, I'm gonna drop some hot facts about Warhammer and Games Workshop:

>Warhammer Fantasy and 40k are fantastic worlds and IPs, owned by a dogshit company run by retards.
>Both used to be hubs of personality, style, unmatched aesthetics, and freedom for a person to dive into and swim around in, and both have been completely mangled and reduced to trash by Games Workshop.
>With only one or two minor exceptions from 20 years ago, there have been NO good Warhammer 40k video games, films, books, or any material created to expand the universe. Yes, this means your favorite "lol but i liek it" trash is included in that.
>Games Workshop will NEVER make anything good. Every single thing they put their stamp on is objective shit.

If you didn't know about or engage with Warhammer before the year 2000, you are not entitled to speak on the subject, period.

I know some dump lore, I just don't know what games are in the series. So far, there are RTS games and some shooters.

>Why are there like a billion games in the series?
There is no "series", Warhammer isn't a fucking video game franchise or something.

It's an IP that originally was a tabletop wargame, and then got licensed out to be used as a setting for video games, films, books, and other shit.

You sound like a bitter old man

Thanks, Fren.

Everything you like in this world was created by bitter old men. They are literally the people you rely on to make anything of value.

>TFW 39
>TFW never had children

It has extreme peaks and valleys but overall the universe is a lot of fun with some really cool shit.

Nah, you're older than big E himself

It Cringe