Your boss just sent you an email asking what have you been doing for the last 4 hours. How do you respond?

just use some jobspecific terms like: had to update the odbc drivers because since the update it does not support TLS lower than 1.2 but because of the specific db infrastructure in the network i needed the spcial qle driver because it forces non ANSI authentication, which is needed because of the special characters the passwort safty requires. So I had to Install newest drivers, get informed that they dont work (i.e. someone else (whoever that is) messed up so you had to wait (forced wait)) and then deinstall + clean and check the system to then finally install the right drivers and then testing if the connection now works as desired.
As you see user, I didn't do that in the last 4h but if a HR hears that he knows I am very important.

Jokes on you, I play invite only servers with a handful of internet friends.
Cope and get back to those reports wagie.

I am unemployed

Just tell him menstruating. Make him try to question your womanhood in this politically charged environment. Also add pronouns to your email signature.

watched zverev vs alcarzar, now Nadal vs Djoko

I then start whatever task I was supposed to do, wait 30 minutes, and then respond that I've "nearly finished".

I've been working boss

Edging.

Poop, scoop!
Whoop! Whoopty-whoop!

Kek

mark as spam

*squints at clock*

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I send him a 4 hour long video of me jacking it to big anime titties