Hello biz. Something that is not talked a lot when it comes to finances is the crab mentality of the black family when it comes to new generations trying to crawl up and be successful. I am one of them. Before I got to where I am, my mother was bad with finances. So bad that she is currently defaulted on probably at least twenty loans across state. Apparently she even used my number as a contact because Ive gotten a few calls of loan offices looking for her. She has stolen lots of money from me in the past, from my student loans to getting my bank info somehow one time. I cut her off from money but now she wants my credit cards. Here I am trying to get my business going but I foolishly am still keeping her phone number.
For those who have had similar experiences, should I cut my mother off for good? I will feel bad if I just do that, but she won't learn ever and she is only bringing me and my siblings down.
If you actually are black why would you talk about that here with a bunch of people who are not
Chase Jackson
Cause a lot of our community sucks at managing money. Its epidemic level.
Juan Brooks
Yes, at some point you have to realize you can't save everyone. That also goes for your own blood. Help yourself first and then help others. This whole remember where you came from crap is for the birds. If the people in your life are elevating you, then it's time to drop them. Don't feel bad, you did what you can which is hindering your growth financially. You're grown now act like it.
Benjamin Robinson
Easier said than done. If her oldest cut contact with her, I feel it would be equivalent to killing her with my own hands.
Connor Sanders
She obviously takes you for granted and cares more for your wallet than you as a person. People like this need a wake up call, cutting off contact will definitely have that effect.
Yes. You'll see a few here with the boomer mentality that you should always help family no matter what. But that's just something parasites and cucks push. Royal families throughout history have always killed off the dead weight that held the overall family line back.
Henry Lee
Thats why Im split. I hear youre suppose to keep family helped, but right now if I keep helping mines I will literally be broke and in debt.
Brody Morgan
I've noticed this with my white stoner "friends" from college. When I got my shit together and started making good money they give me shit for selling out lmao. ngmi
You gotta do what will set you up for success, ultimately it's your life. I've heard the noise from every angle (except my own family, thank god), and the only true way to beat it is to ignore it.
"Don't study go to college, that ain't what black people do" "don't study ___, that's not black enough"
I have friends also that are incredibly irresponsible and I just had to set a rule, I don't lend money, I don't borrow money from anyone. I have a friend who's roommate became a complete deadbeat, and if he had followed this rule as well, he wouldn't now be out $8800.
Look after yourself.
Justin Phillips
Not going to lie, lower class white families are just as bad. Boomer dad was furious at me for making 40K in a day. He then advised me to invest in some Trump stock he say on TV. I told him it was the same as buying commemorative presidential memorabilia. He screamed at me that I was the reason the country was dying and walked off. He knows I’m conservative.
Gave my best friend 100 bucks and an easy 10x last cycle. After it mooned he texted me that he didn’t like where I was going with crypto, he missed the old me, and wanted to talk about his depression. I only ever mentioned crypto once in our 15 year friendship, and it was that play.
GF left me when I got Any Forums before ever getting Any Forums. Wammen tho lol.
Extended family doesn’t talk with me, another childhood friend outwardly hates me now since he found out I went to college, and my former workplace friends really-really hate me.
Ive seen just as bad whites so I didnt mean to make this sound like a black thing only. Just its very rampant around blacks where the families continuously bring down any black person who is almost looking like he or she is about to get on the road to success. Then suddenly theyre paying their bills and broke as hell. I dont want that life.
Joshua Stewart
Ever seen the show Intervention? The only thing you can do is let her hit rock bottom and offer zero help. Otherwise she’ll never learn. That’s literally it. No matter how much it hurts, you can’t swoop in and help her, thereby enabling her. Suck it up and worry about yourself right now. She’ll eventually hit rock bottom, but not before kicking and screaming and making you feel like the scum of the earth. Ignore it all. When she knows you aren’t there anymore, she’ll figure her shit out. Or she won’t. Either way, it’s not your responsibility.
Christopher Price
How tight is your connection to local community, and is that connection worth keeping? You might just want to move to another city "for work". It's much easier to do the right thing and deny requests over the phone.
If parents aren't supporting their kids (their bloodline) then they cease to be family. That's how my father raised me and it's worked out well. The dirtbag family members had to earn their way back.
Hudson James
Family supports family. If a member stops supporting they stop being family. Simple as.
Absolutely. There's zero reason to be loaning money anymore. Anyone with a phone, bicycle, and no felonies can get started with doordash and be making money within an hour.
Asher Hernandez
I work in public education. It's absolutely surreal to see how dramatically different the results are when you compare mixed kids who declare themselves mixed vs those who just declare themselves black. You can control for family income, you can control for parents education, anything you can imagine. The declared mixed kids CONSISTENTLY outperform and are all around better people. It really is about culture.
Levi Flores
To clarify, that means she stopped supporting family, and is therefore not family anymore. You can cut them out guilt free under this definition.
Grayson Walker
With all due respect fuck your mother and her bullshit. There is plenty of dead beat kids who don't support or even speak to their parents. If she assumes you are one of them fuck it, it solves the problem and she stops causing you problems. When you have money to help her you pick up the phone again and help her like the good son you are.
John Cox
Im moving away soon so I wont be around anymore for her. She is going to have to depend on her other family that she ran away from.
Wyatt Howard
Your entire basis for saying it’s about culture was that kids that were half something other than black weren’t like the fully black kids.
