/Garloid Farming General/ /gfg/

Sup Garloidchads, how’s it going down at your ‘loid ranch? Any tips on getting adolescents to fatten up properly? Mine seem to shed excessive skincheese even when the phosphorus levels are properly balanced.

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I have a small farm, mostly to learn and support my habit. I've been importing NYC tap water and it's show to be worth the expenses. Yield has increased 212%

Wtf? Use water from Switzerland you absolute dumbass

They got banned in my shitty third world country. Apparently they represent "a major health risk" when fed tap water and mongoloids have been using exactly that. God I hate government so much is unreal

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>HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
>HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
>HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
>HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
>HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME
HE FELL FOR THE SWISS TAP WATER MEME

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I'm new to garloid farming, where can i buy them and how do i start a farm??

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does swiss tap water count?

You guys don't detip your loids? Euro fags, I swear, I thought ya'll about high regulations and standards. I take em to the local synagog for processing .25 a pop. This is like selling a whole, unbutchered pig in a store, abolutely wtf.

I buy them on the dark net (Monero-only). Pure bred, you can tell by the shine of their excrements. Ukrainian garloids gonna pump in 2 years when Russia stops letting them out of the region. I have one but it's male. FML

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I still don't get it. After four years here.... Is this a slide thread? Is there an inside joke only old fags are privy to? WTF

Crush up birth control tablets and add one to the water every day for 2 months. Swear to God, it'll swap genders.

Garloid thread = bottom signal

Anyone have that webm of a girl pouring sauce on a tapwater-fed garloid and biting its asshole off? I need it for research, a class project unironically

This is very painful for garloids and has a very low success rate, not worth the risk. I leaned this the hard way.

Grow some, it'll click eventually. I'm glad I took the leap.

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Why can I not find any quality milk in the stores anymore? Do I really need to own one of these slimy fuckers just to get my fix?

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Kys sadistic fuck

Mine keeps raping me
HELP!

try not shoving it in your asshole

Is this actually a viable business? I feel like shrimp have a better ROI than garloids. Most people don't even know what garloids are, let alone where to buy them.

If you hold your ear to your garloid, you can hear gentle swish-swoshing of the water. Feels better than listening to my pregnant wife's belly, but don't tell her that.

wtf are you doing with garloid milk if you aren't raising any baby garloids yourself???

that shit is NOT SAFE for human consumption

based. i only found this out recently but the tiny krill in NYC water make it the best for nourishing growing garloids. definitely worth the investment if you're trying to get serious.

Stop. Asking about garloids if you don't can get "them" to notice you. I don't raise garloids by choice anymore.

I've been drinking the stuff for years, mostly to help with my Gerd. Is there something I need to know?

schedule a checkup for colon cancer with your doctor immediately
tell him to check for orbis in the cranidial villi.
fuckers like to nest there sometimes and spread to your nervous system
had a friend of mine become a vegetable from drinking unfiltered garloid milk as a kid

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Just remember to flush fluoride ions from your garloids from time to time if you're using jew york tap water. add a drop of iodine, garloids slurp it all up and excrete out the fluoride

Fuck. Welp, I'll see you guys later. Hope I don't die.

if your doctor finds any, don't let them operate on you
cutting them open can make it worse
I recommend heavily fluoridated water (5000ppm) for a week
most of them should eject after a few days, might not want to flush the fuckers down the toilet but burn them instead
some speculate that's how the chinks caused covid

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I'll do that, thanks user. And it worked so well too, I really didn't want to get put on PPIs.