How do I move to Norway?

Jannies, I am wanted by the Bong Constabulary for holding an egg near the King and must flee Bongland therefore this is political.

Anons, I confess. I hate England. It use to snow here regularly in the colder months, but now I’m lucky to see the ground covered.

How does this sound?

> Become a first generation immigrant, move to Norway.
> Find a town or rural area where I can use my skills
> Devote myself the local community, prove I’m useful and worth taking in
> Learn their language, customs, and adopt them entirely

What are my odds of success, anons? Can I do it? I want to wade through the snow with a hound again.

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I laughed.

Wtf, that's the map from Battlefield 5

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If you have shitskin should be easy.

Youre gonna need eu citizenship. Since youre a bong you probably have an Irish grandparent since most bongs are part Irish in denial. Us that to get Irish citizenship then get a job there. Once you have permanent residency then get autismbux.

I’m autistic, I know. But maybe if I shovel enough snow they’ll overlook my retardation?

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If you are white move to south brazil, with your bong monys I will show you how to ranch cattle and prosper

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No niggers my fren, i was there in 2012 and i could't spot a single shitskin nor nigger. Just lovely and kind people

Wtf, you actually played battlefield v?

Is it cold there? Is there snow, Brazil-user?

I know someone who's trying to LEAVE Norway, you both could just switch identities.

Yes, sadly. I ignored the warning signs of the robot-armed lesbian. I should have stopped at BF1

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Kek, now i am paraguay

clearly your best bet fren

>holding an egg near the king

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They have a winter but it's more like a Mediterranean winter, only some high altitude places get a bit of snow. You would need to go to Chile or Argentina to find areas with real winter.

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Only in some places, winter rarelly drops bellow 2c to -2c in average, but in some high altitude areas it can snow.

Oi, he failed to provide his egg-carrying loicense

jesus christ.. you know, britain really fucking sucks but god damn their humor is great

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Just copy what Silvio did

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Man, that’s warm. I think I’ll pass on Brazil fren, even though being a cowboy sounds fun

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You'll last one (1) winter. Also, it's getting fucked and cucked here

Nope, not like mediterranean no, South brazil is a semi temperate kind of weather without, for the most part, the coast influenced weather of the mediterraneans, but still we hit higher averages because we have a higher temperature variance. It's a good comparison tho

Why does he want to leave, user?

Canada has some places remote enough that you can pretend youre not in cucknada

Ok, people here finds it very cold lol. Good luck to you werever you go

I think my autism would buff me, I’d last 2 winters user. I’d go walking across the hills in the second winter and fall down a crevice and die

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There are so many great countries to move to. Have you thought about Slovenia, Croatia, or Austria? They are much warmer

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I just mean in Temperature. Its 16f right now in porto alegre, thats comparable to the warmer parts of the region

Can you shoot glaciers there like you can here?

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They’re nice, but that’s the issue. They’re warm. I want to watch the southern imports freeze y’know?

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>I want to watch the southern imports freeze y’know?
I understand lol

Norway isn't part of the EU, check again

Average Alaskan. Who needs Siberia when Alaska exists?

I'll give you my 2 cents

You'd have to move up north for you to get proper snow in the winter. Winters are usually mild, it's mostly gray slush and rain along the coast in the southern half during winter

You're also likely to have a hard time finding new friends there. People here are known to be cold and hard to get to know and it's true. Not saying it's near impossible just difficult. It's worse in the rural areas, where you might have more snow. There's also less stuff to do there, everything outside of the 3-4 largest cities are just rural.

I wish you luck, man. My advice if you do decide to come is to try your hardest at joining a hobby group or community, that's the best way to get to know people.

I would recommend tierra del fuego, but argentina is fucked up in communism.

In fact, now that I think about it, this is perhaps the fairest residence visa policy for any country: anyone from "x" nation who is older than 18 years of age can move to "y" nation and be allowed residence visa, only if they can match in exchange with 1 person (no more than 10 years difference in age) from "y" nation who moves to "x" nation.
>that way, it's naturally harder for people from less favorable nations to trade up to more favorable nations, but not entirely impossible
>nothing has to be restricted necessarily about any other attribute of the persons involved other than their age and their present residence

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But why do they act so EU then?

It's part of the schenghen area. You can move there as an EU citizen since theyre part of the common travel area

he's just some average grass is greener type who wants to move to Texas

Thank you for the advice fren, I’ve heard that the people reflect the climate. In a way, I like that. I see it as a reflection of being more honest, and not the over politeness which you find in Bongland

>over politeness which you find in Bongland
We have that in the US too, everyone seems so passive-aggressive and fake/ distant.

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That sounds comfy, ngl