>Inside booze-fuelled chaos of Magaluf that could be about to end as Spain wages war on rowdy Brit tourists
thesun.co.uk
>Man ‘accidentally cuts his own testicles off’ when asleep dreaming about cutting meat
dailystar.co.uk
>Scared beachgoers call police over 'murdered woman' as sex doll washes up on sand
dailystar.co.uk
>This happened
youtube.com
eat mccain chips. get autism
one day we're all going to die like those capuchin monks
another face in a graveyard accidentally walked into by tourists
gaunt, meaningless
never been on a lads holiday
i am whiter than anyone on brit/pol/ most likely
Stop drinking.
me neither
they're called "Lucky Lucky" men. A Spanish cultural icon.
i've got a black belt in ninjutsu
>I stay inside all day
me too
>I have girlish fingernails
eww
i didn't drink for 3 weeks and i caught covid
You have very feminine hands
i'd leave you battered in a public toilet
i can balance a loaded barbell inbetween my glutes
>he thinks he'll end up in a graveyard and not a communal ash bin
oh dear
Anyone recommend any honest books on Weimar Republic?
Show bussy
Your girlfriend left you because of your drinking.
boring lad tbqhwy
my grandmother was cremated, no grave and i'm thinking she was based
i exclusively show up to no gi sessions wearing nothing but a crash helmet and a suspender belt
George Michael vibe
Reading is cringe
>getting up close and personal with men in the toilets
is this normal for you?
i've mastered a secret and ancient deadly technique where i can choke you with your socks while they're still on your feet
lot of words, I don't know what they mean
damn right, man was a hero
The older I get the more racist I become.
Madonna vibe
She didn't stay with me more when i quit drinking
she went to london with a homosexual and a whore
and i was sick with covid
the older i get the older i become
of course, the best way to gaybash is to lull them into a false sense of security by having sex with first
Boring vibe
>10 minute taxi from work to the pub is now £35
went home instead ffs
piss take
>sex with first
sex with them first*
sorry lads, got all excited and forgot me words
George Best vibe
>sheeeiiiuh
>Dis be the wypipo table?
>It be mup da bix nood in heah
*Worried looks*
>WE TYRONE UP IN DIS BISH NIGGGAAAA
>choose life
>saw it in a film once
but why would i want to do a thing like that?
Sad Update on Huginn, He hasn't made it through the night. I went out a couple of hours ago and he was lying down on his back, very relaxed and still didn't seem to have eaten anything. I figured he was either in his last moments or completely relaxed, seems like it was the former. When i went to see him earlier he looked so at peace as he was moving on, he lay on his back and looked right up at me twisting his head somewhat, came back to him just now and he's not breathing anymore. I just hope i gave him some comfort in his last moments. I'd like to think that being covered in the box with some food and water in a peaceful garden was a nicer send off than dying by the roadside.
R.I.P Huginn
boring
i chose not to choose life
Tory bros I don't feel too good....
pigeon pie is delicious
sorry for your loss
>"We were sitting in a bar on the beach, and when she got up to go to the toilet I leaned over and took all the money she had in her bag."
i chose something else
Not boring
He has a serious problem
Solemn
Dirt?
and the reasons?
there are no reasons
labour were always going to win the next election, tory scum have been in power too long
the plebs need to be reminded what real incompetence in governance looks like
who needs reasons when you've got heroin?
Choose fucking a 15 year old with her parents next door
no one asked about your mum's toys
Just look out the window
i'd love to lad, but I blew all my veins out slamming speed back in the 2000s
the doctors don't know how I'm alive, but here I am
bread is bad for birds mate you probably killed huggin
When i was a support worker i worked with this girl and told her to never trust authority figures and told her all about ted bundy
i did this on a public bus wearing a lanyard sayig where i worked
>durr lets vote blue!
>oh no everything is shit!
>lets vote red instead!
>oh no everything is shit!
Repeat.
Fucking normies disgust me.
gunpowder treason
Weed > heroin
For me it's booze though. 6 pack of 16 oz pilsners and two shots and I am ready for my flight m8s I am FUCKED
quite so
I was in M&S today.
I shit you fucking not 80% people there were BAME.
Crying nogs everywhere.
No one speaking English.
Gay pride flags still up.
My god.
i am moving from the sofa to the bedroom. join me.
sit back and smother the pain with an unknown dose of an unknown drug made in somebody's fucking kitchen
>'Get a grip, I'm no racist': Mother who blacked-up her three-year-old daughter for Halloween defends the 'creative' beach-seller costume
Arkansas reporting in.
Question, why do your houses rarely have a yard? When I watch Peppa pig with my son they all have nice yards, but when I look at properties in the UK it's just a glorified porch or there's a bit of grass smaller than one of the rooms of the house. Seems weird
Opened the car door of the 1996 Cadillac Fleetwood.
It's hot as fuck here despite raining s bit
choose unfulfilled promise and wishing you'd done it all differently
choose never learning from your own mistakes
>why do your houses rarely have a yard?
tories
N...no lad.
LOL!
British Army is no longer for the sons of the Republic.
choose posting cringememes on a quasi-racist imageboard instead of having sex
choose watching history repeat itself
So a political party took your houses?
Vote for labour and reclaim them
>Republic
we're a constitutional monarchy
choose the slow reconciliation towards what you can get rather than what you always hoped for
youtube.com
i can win her back with a grand gesture
labour want to tax them
Choose BritPol
Choose a 7 day fast and use tobacco to raise those test levels a cheeky bit innit
settle for less and keep a brave face on it
who would have thought it? the hill the world chooses to die on is the tranny flag. Where have we seen this before Abraham?
>use tobacco to raise those test levels
my mate Turkish Dan down the council gym sells me the real T booster shots
ive made it to the bedroom. im glad you could join me.
Shan't
Will be drinking the last two pilsners and two shots before me flight
Just watch me
a corpse in a field
please don't narrate your wank mate, i haven't the effort to berate you every step of the way, fucking drunk
choose dissapointment and choose losing the ones you loved and as they fall from view a piece of you dies with them until you can see that one day in the future, piece by piece, they will all be gone and there will be nothing left of you to call alive or dead
Open the window, bit stinky
Choose life. Choose a career in HR. Choose a mulatto family with 3 dads. Choose a chinese spyware box to hang on your wall and display racemixing propaganda. Choose obscure pronouns in your twitter bio, electric cars, choose liberal podcasts by cocaine addicted trust fund babies... Choose wondering what the fuck gender you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that sofa and watching jew'd out diversity programming, stuffing goyslop into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable bame home surrounded by the agressive, subhuman coons you voted to replace yourself. Choose life.
M8 I've got test too but you've got to naturally testmaxx, hghmaxx and gainzmaxx before juicing.
Simple as.
You really are a fat bahstard!
>why do your houses rarely have a yard?
senpai your country is basically empty compared to ours.
we're smaller than California with double the population.
why do you think?
is this Sir Keith's Labour election slogan?
There were some roadworks on the way to work today and I swear there were highway maintenance trucks painted pink with something about 'pride' written on the side. I was on the bus because the trains were on strike and it was full of africans shouting forren into their phones the whole journey. Popped into asda after I got off the bus to get some scotch eggs and the self-checkout area was blocked by a BAME family with young girls shouting and twerking to some dreadful music on their phones. It's not great out there.
choose your future brincel
choose life
walking around catacombs i literally give zero fucks about who the person was in life
i just see a corpse
i don't care if they were a judge who spent their whole life moral
or some murderer
just a fucking corpse who cares
bollocks, slam it in my arse
to late i already jizzed on paddington
anway...
...it amused us at the time
>ours
Fuck off paki
Scared to actually inject lad. What if I die from malnourishment?
the bear or the station?
Oh you were the mayor of palermo in 1567 don't care you're dead
Why can't the tories just get it over with and print even more money?
Just do it. Hand it out like beans.
It will get you elected again.
"Beans for all!!"
who cares? when they do the autopsy they'll note down that you were fucking ripped to the max
imagine an entire nation with the density of NY State or the tip of florida
dont worry lad, when Labour get into power in 2 years time, the printers will be going full belt
Honestly don't know how it happened, reckon it's genetics.
sorry
R cuntreh
better?
boring
No matter how long you live, the result is never altered.
Why does Josh fear Eddie?
Want to wield me sword simple as.
brown sauce on hotdogs is vile
Based red team. Can always count on em for unlimited beans.
The beans must flow lads.
the station.
£1bn for channel taxi boats
it's going to be a good time to be a mariner
Reported to the south Yorkshire police twitter account. You're nicked son.
