>DUDE YOU NEED TO DRIVE INNOVATION AND THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX LMAO. DUDE I DON'T WANT TO BE "THAT GUY" BUT YOUR PERFORMANCE IS SUFFERING AND I FEEL THAT YOU'RE LAGGING BEHIND YOUR PEERS. DUDE EVERYONE HAS NOTICED THAT YOU BARELY SPEAK IN MEETINGS. DUDE YOU NEED TO START BEING A TEAM PLAYER, TO VOLUNTEER FOR MORE WORK, TO MAKE YOUR OPINIONS KNOWN. DUDE AND I REALLY NEED YOU TO LEARN MORE AND BE A SME -- DUDE THAT MEANS SUBJECT MATTER EXPERT, YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS BY NOW -- AND TO BE TO THE GO TO GU -- SORRY, I MEAN THE GO TO PERSON.
>DUDE I'M SORRY AND I REALLY DON'T WANT TO DO THIS BUT I'M GONNA HAVE TO PUT YOU ON A PIP -- DUDE, COME ON, THAT MEANS PERFORMANCE IMPROVEMENT PLAN -- UNTIL YOU SHAPE UP. DUDE YOU HAVE 90 DAYS TO CORRECT THESE PROBLEMS AND YOU'RE NO LONGER ELIGIBLE FOR THE 3% ANNUAL PERFORMANCE BASED BONUS AND YOU WILL AUTOMATICALLY BE CONSIDERED AS "DOES NOT MEET EXPECTATIONS" IN YOUR ANNUAL REVIEWS. DUDE I'M ALSO GONNA NEED YOU TO SCHEDULE A 1 HOUR MEETING EVERY MORNING WITH STACY FROM HR TO DISCUSS YOUR GOALS FOR THE DAY AND HOW YOU'RE MAKING PROGRESS TOWARD GETTING OFF THIS PIP -- DUDE, I TOLD YOU BEFORE, IT MEANS PROGRESS IMPROVEMENT PLAN, COME ON!
Pantomime leftists
>DUDE JUST GET AN OFFICE JOB LMAO. DUDE JUST GO TO COLLEGE FOR 4 YEARS AND STUDY SOMETHING IT DOESN'T MATTER DUDE RACK UP $100K IN LOANS AND GET A PIECE OF PAPER. DUDE JUST APPLY TO 80 JOBS A DAY IN LINKEDIN AND NETWORK AND MAKE CONNECTIONS AND TALK TO YOUR SCHOOL'S CAREER OFFICE. DUDE JUST MANUALLY TYPE IN THE SAME INFORMATION YOU HAVE ON YOUR RESUME INTO THE HUMAN RESOURCES APPLICATION PORTAL OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND DUDE AFTER APPLYING TO 750 JOBS JUST TALK TO 250 DIFFERENT RETARDED HR WOMEN ON A PHONE SCREEN AND DO 100 DIFFERENT FIRST ROUND VIDEO INTERVIEWS AND 50 DIFFERENT SECOND ROUND VIDEO INTERVIEWS AND 25 DIFFERENT THIRD ROUND INTERVIEWS AND DUDE GET GHOSTED BY 24 OF THOSE BEFORE THIRD ROUND INTERVIEWS YOU GET 1 OFFER. DUDE YOU DID IT CONGRATULATIONS LMAO!!!!!! DUDE JUST SHOW UP TO THE JOB WITH A SMILE ON YOUR FACE AND WEAR BUSINESS CASUAL AND SIT IN A FLUORESCENT LIT, OPEN OFFICE WAGECATTLE KILLFLOOR FOR 10 HOURS A DAY ON SALARY BECAUSE WE HAVE DEADLINES TO MEET AND WE'RE SHORTSTAFFED BUT WE HAVE TO MAKE DUE WITH WHAT WE HAVE AND MANAGEMENT PROMISED THEY'D REASSESS THE MANPOW -- SORRY, I MEAN STAFFING BUDGET NEXT FISCAL YEAR. DUDE JUST BE A TEAM AND PLAYER AND SPEAK UP DURING MEETINGS AND DRIVE PROCESS IMPROVEMENTS AND USE BUZZWORDS UNIRONICALLY, LIKE DUDE YOU REALLY NEED TO SEE THE 30,000 FOOT VIEW BUT DON'T BOIL THE OCEAN IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. DUDE DON'T FORGET TO SIGN YOUR BOSS'S BIRTHDAY CARD AND DUDE THAT GIRL FROM ACCOUNTS PAYABLE THAT YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW IS HAVING A BABY AND WE'RE ALL CHIPPING IN TO BUY HER A BABY SHOWER GIFT DUDE I'LL SEND YOU THE VENMO INFO LATER THE SUGGESTED DONATION IS $50. DUDE I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU HAVE TO DONATE BUT NOT CHIPPING IN WOULD BE A BAD LOOK SINCE YOU'RE NEW AND ALL. BY THE WAY WE NEED YOU TO COME IN EARLY TOMORROW THERE'S AN HOUR LONG 8:00 AM ALL HANDS MEETING AND BTW DON'T FORGET TO DO YOUR QUARTERLY COMPLIANCE TRAININGS, THEY'RE DUE TOMORROW BY 9:00 AM SHARP. DUDE JUST GET AN OFFICE JOB LMAO.
DUDE JUST SIT IN FRONT OF YOUR COMPUTER FOR 4 YEARS STRAIGHT RESEARCHING THEN GET OUTPERFORMED BY 18 YEAR OLD DOGCOIN TRADERS DUDE JUST RESEARCH NODES STAKING TVL RSI DAPPS NFTS DEX'S RUGPULLS YIELD FARMING GAMEFI GAS SOLIDITY ERC-20 STABLECOINS ORACLES ICOS SHARDING SMART CONTRACTS COMPOUND SCALABILITY PRESALES FORKS AIRDROPS PROTOCOLS TOKENOMICS DAOS LIQUIDITY PARTNERSHIPS L2 ETHEREUM AVALNCHE SOLANA TERRA CRONOS POLYGON COSMOS NEAR TRON XRP BSC FANTOM ICP HEDERA UNISWAP AND 500 OTHER COINS 24/7 AND THEN YOU MIGHT MAKE IT IN 4 YEARS DUDE JUST WATCH THE LINE GO UP AND DOWN ALL DAY LONG AND MANAGE TO NOT GO CRAZY AND BUY WHEN THE LINE IS LOW AND SELL WHEN THE LINE IS UP DUDE JUST DAYTRADE AND MAKE 1% A DAY DUDE JUST LEARN MOVING AVERAGE MACD RSI CCI STOCHIASTIC BOLLINGER BANDS SUPER TREND WILLIAM'S %R VOLUME EMA OPEN INTEREST VWAP TWAP BRAP FIBONACCI RETRACEMENT ADI CORRELATION COEFFICIENT MONEY FLOW INDEX ACCULUMATION DISTRIBUTION DUDE JUST AVOID GETTING HACKED EVEN THOUGH THE STRESS OF BEING POTENTIALLY HACKED AT ANY TIME EATS AWAY AT YOU DUDE JUST USE 100X LEVERAGE THEN IT ONLY HAS TO GO UP 1% TO DOUBLE YOUR MONEY DUDE JUST BROWSE Any Forums ALL DAY LONG AND MANAGE TO NOT GO CRAZY GOING THROUGH 100,000 PEPE WOJAK BOBO MUMU AND SNIB POSTS TO GET THAT 1 RARE GEM POST THAT MIGHT GIVE YOU A 5X RETURN IF YOU BUY AT THE RIGHT TIME NOW DUDE JUST BUY SONIC ETHER OBAMA HARRY POTTER 10 NIGGER DOGE CUNT COCK COIN EARLY AND WAIT FOR THAT 100,000X DUDE JUST PUT ALL OF YOUR MONEY INTO A YIELD FARM AND MAKE 40% A YEAR ON A COIN THAT DEPRECEATES 80% IN VALUE A YEAR DUDE JUST BUY BITCOIN AND HOPE THAT IT WILL BECOME THE WORLD RESERVE CURRENCY IN LIKE 40 YEARS DUDE JUST BUY THE HYPERLINK TO A FUNNY PICTURE OF A MONKEY FOR HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS AND RESELL IT TO SOMEONE ELSE FOR A HIGHER PRICE
>DUDE JUST LEARN A TRADE LMAO DUDE JUST WORK AS A HELPER TO GAIN EXPERIENCE BECAUSE THEY ALL WANT APPRENTICES WITH EXPERIENCE DUDE JUST MAKE FRIENDS WITH SOMEONE IN THE UNION AND KEEP REAPPLYING OVER AND OVER UNTIL YOU FINALLY GET IN AND THEN SPEND 5 YEARS DOING APPRENTICE TRAINING GETTING ABUSED BY BOOMER BOSSES AND BOOMER FOREMEN AND RETARDED ALCOHOLIC DRUG ADDICT COWORKERS DUDE JUST KEEP DOING THE APPRENTICESHIP PROGRAM EVEN IF THEY CUT YOUR HOURS FOR A LACK OF WORK AND THE 5 YEAR PROGRAM TURNS INTO 7 YEARS WHEN YOU FINALLY FINISH IT DUDE JUST WORK 60 HOURS A WEEK ON MANDATORY OVERTIME FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE DUDE JUST WAKE UP AT 4 AM AND DRIVE 1 HOUR TO THE JOBSITE IN A RATFUCK PICKUP TRUCK AND DRINK A GALLON OF COFFEE AND SMOKE A PACK OF CIGARETTES BY NOON JUST TO STAY AWAKE DUDE JUST IGNORE THE BACK PAIN AND KNEE PAIN AND JOINT PAIN DUDE KEEP WORKING, WORK UNTIL NIGHTFALL AND SPEND YOUR ENTIRE LIFE BREAKING YOUR BACK IN THE HOT AND THE COLD DUDE IT'S WORTH IT BECAUSE YOU MAKE $100K A YEAR DUDE JUST LEARN A TRADE WHO NEEDS COLLEGE DUDE ALL 157 MILLION WORKERS IN THE UNITED STATES NEED TO LEARN A TRADE DUDE LITERALLY EVERYONE SHOULD BE AN ELECTRICIAN, OR A PLUMBER, OR A WELDER, OR A CARPENTER, DUDE LEARN A TRADE LMAO
DUDE JUST SLAVE AWAY AT A JOB YOU HATE FOR 40 YEARS DUDE JUST PUT ON A FAKE PERSONALITY HAHA NETFLIX GOOD HOLIDAYS GOOD COOL KIDS KAREN OOPS FORGOT TO SMILE FOR A SECOND OOPS HUMAN RESOURCES FIRING ME DUDE JUST PAY FOR RENT WITH YOUR SAVINGS DUDE MANAGER SAYS YOU'RE NOT A TEAM PLAYER YOU'RE A SMART GUY user WE JUST NEED SOMEONE WHO LEANS IN MORE ADDS VALUE TAKES A STRATEGIC APPROACH DUDE PLS FIX THE SLIDE HAS THE WRONG FONT COME HAVE LUNCH WITH US BECKY GOT PROMOTED WE ARE A FAMILY IT'S NOT WHAT YOU KNOW IT'S HOW YOU SAY IT WE BUILT A FRAMEWORK TO FRAME EMOTIONS AND BUILD CAPABILITY AND DIVERSIFY NETWORKS MANDATORY QUOTA INDIGENOUS LAND GRAB OATH PLEDGE OF FORGIVENESS INEQUALITY IT'S NOT A CORE VALUE IT RUNS THROUGH EVERYTHING DUDE WHAT IS YOUR WEAKNESS WHY WORK HERE EXECUTIVE PRESENCE MANDATORY TRAINING SHOW LEADERSHIP IS ABOUT FOLLOWING WHICH IS ABOUT LEADING DUDE OPEN PLAN OFFICE CAN'T HEAR YOURSELF THINK CAN'T THINK CAN'T OOPS SORRY WAS ON MUTE LET'S TAKE THIS OFFLINE I DON'T NEED THE DETAILS
>DUDE I just LOVE the hustle and bustle of THE WAR, It’s so DYNAMIC and makes me feel like I’m in one of my favorite WAR MOVIES. You should totally come on down to my FOB, It’s got Hesco walls and everything, we can CRACK open a nice soi MRE, or three, and get crazy watching some INDISCERNIBLE FIGURES on the HORIZON! And dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down into the SHIT - listen here, right, It's this place, where us WARRIORS who do WARS can get WOUNDED and slowly BLEED to DEATH. BUT!!!! It’s also a place, where you can ACT OUT your PYSCHOPATHIC MURDER FETISH, like when we were kids playing video games, but It's FOR REAL. Best of all there won't be any dumb sanity bothering us. Speaking of which, my CO and I have finally decided to bomb that hospital, literally - we’re both dropping willy pete on it tomorrow, that way, we can really get PTSD when we find out the maternity wing was filled with BABIES. I’m fuckin JACKED man, I'm gonna SLAM this rotting MRE and pop open another one!!!
>Dude, I completely have had exactly this same thought actually. Like... Time is just there to write a narrative we call "why" and that's it. Make a pilpul and pillory of the goys, really, like right now, "why" NEVER actually matters really.
Right now shit exists.
>But we get anxious because of time. Because "later" other stuff will happen.
So we write a narrative we call "why" to predict what "will" happen and soothe our anxiety about something that actually doesn't even exist.
>Anyway, thanks for reading my kosher linguistics rants.
>They were fun to write, so it's good not to just get called a rabbi outright.
oh dude, your fucked. may i interest you in neetdom?
DUDE i just LOVE the hustle and bustle of the big city, it’s so DYNAMIC and makes me feel like i’m in one of my favourite TV SHOWS. you should totally come on down to my studio apartment, it’s got EXPOSED RED BRICK walls and everything, we can crack open a nice hoppy ipa or three and get crazy watching some cartoons on adult swim! and dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down to the barcade- listen here, right, it’s a BAR where us ADULTS who do ADULTING can go DRINK. BUT!!!! it’s also an ARCADE like when we were kids, so we can play awesome VIDEO GAMES, without dumb kids bothering us. speaking of which megan and i have finally decided to tie the knot- literally -we’re both getting snipped tomorrow at the hospital, that way we can save money to spent more on ourselves and our FURBABIES. i’m fuckin JACKED man, i’m gonna SLAM this craft beer and pop open another one!!!
But DUDE i just LOVE the hustle and bustle of the big slave auction, it’s so DYNAMIC and makes me feel like i’m in one of my favourite MINSTREL SHOWS. You should totally come on down to my plantation, it’s got EXPOSED RED BRICK walls and everything, we can crack open a nice sweet tea or three and get crazy watching some drakes sing and dance! and dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down to the Buck Breaking- listen here, right, it’s a PLACE where us SLAVE OWNERS who do SLAVE OWNING can go BREAK BUCKS. BUT!!!! it’s also an CARNIVAL like when we were kids, so we can play awesome CARNIVAL GAMES, without dumb kids bothering us. Speaking of which Susannah and I have finally decided to tie the knot- literally -we’re both hanging some slaves tomorrow, that way we can save money to spent more on ourselves and our FURBABIES. i’m fuckin JACKED man, i’m gonna SLAM this sweet tea and pop open another one!!
Oh god he has the chaos emeralds
Just a pasta thread user no worries. Post some of your own pastas too
I love you, OP.
Consoomers are the new nigger slave cattle
We engage in a bit of tomfoolery in ITT user
Add to the bantz argie bro
ikr, if this guys autism had a look, it would look like picrel. im not gay or anything. but, theoretically speaking. 2.3%.
Shades of old Any Forums and /new/
I don't know if thats a complement or an acxurate description, either way you're mega based amd autistic too user
Hey guys, I know I am seeing a lot of back-and-forth on this topic, but I really need to push back and raise some red flags here.
Having an on-site office presence is foundational to our ability to drive efficiencies in a corporate landscape. It is in our DNA. Sure, there is no 'one size fits all' or silver bullet and some are just boilerplate solutions, leveraged to the hilt and really only keeping us at a 30,000-foot-view of things. Being on-site, however, really allow us to get better granularity, find better directional-indicators, or loop back and dive deep into some critical issues on a go-forward basis.
I think if you all start spending more time in the office again, you'll find yourself trending toward the positive, but you'll have to keep an eye on the puck. Gut through it, reduce thrash, and let's stay in lock-step on this. Yes, we will synergize!
What's the root cause of the hatred of Corporate office spaces? I'll put my layman's hat on and guess that it comes from movies such as Office Space and Dilbert cartoons. But we all know that these are fictional spaces, and real office spaces allow us to touch base in a much more efficient manner.
I have to time-box this comment, as I have a hard-stop in a moment when I will have to jump onto a call. So, just one more point that I want to cover-off on: let's socialize the idea of having more office presence and loop back to see whether we're being more impactful. From a management standpoint, I think that we can get the traction to do it.
So, net/net, ignore the naysayers, sidebar the folks that are stuck in the weeds, and don't waste cycles or bandwidth on folks that don't align strongly with this mission. Try it out, and we'll have another touch point in a little while to see if we've moved the needle. Remember, our north star hasn't changed. We're still championing our core values remotely and we will only do it better in person.
If you need me, I will be online again in a bit.