Will those of you who have been to prison please tell some stories? I want to know what it's really like in there...

Will those of you who have been to prison please tell some stories? I want to know what it's really like in there. Also obviously post what you were in for and how long.

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I was in jail for 4 months for assault. Well behaved so I got out earlier than I expected. Politeness gets you a long way in jail. I never got into any fights and most people just kept to themselves but then again Australian prison culture is probably a lot different than the US given we don’t have any wogs

What are abos like in the joint?

I worked in medical in a maximum security state prison.
It's dirty, depressing, and violent. What do you want to know?

Craziest shit you saw? Also how's the rape situation? Does PREA actually do anything?

The crazy shit is...everything....kek. Lot of the inmates don't really belong in prison. They're insane, but there aren't really good facilities for them anymore. So they go to prison.
I suppose I could give an honorable mention to the one inmate who wanted to get transferred to the state mental hospital and resolved that he would self-harm every week until he achieved it.
So he started sticking things up his urethra. Or in other body parts. On one occasion, he got hold of an electrical wire and managed to insert it into his abdomen and he had to go to the hospital to have it removed.
PREA is actually pretty effective. Pre-PREA, an inmate would get sexually assaulted and corrections staff would basically say, "Well, welcome to prison!"
Nowadays, they have to take it seriously and put that inmate into protective custody. Prison rape does happen but its occurrence is wildly exaggerated. Most prison sex is consensual.

I went to prison for fraud. I sucked nigger cocks for crack. Best time of my life.

I’m a jew male.

Fine, real knowledgeable. If an abo has a problem with someone it’s usually another abo

Were there sounds of cheek bustin' at night?

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What would be your survival strategy if you got sent to prison today? Any pointers other than the usual mind your own business and don't accept favors and free stuff?

Playstation and television in your private cell. In some prisons in Netherlands you can even have small pets like birds. Other inmates are pretty relaxed as long as you’re not around too young people who need to prove themselves or eastern Europeans like Polish, who behave like they are in a Polish prison and not Dutch adult daycare center. Even Moroccans and Suriname people behave pretty chill as long as not too young. At the start of the day a light shines either green (you just start your day), or red (cell search and you strip naked and stand outside your cell naked, but every other prisoner also has to do it at the same time). You can then stay in your cell and play PlayStation or leave to hang around with other prisoners or do work, and close down your own cell door, which opens back at five o clock. Best to close it if you leave, because other prisoners might steal your PlayStation or tv or other shit. You can also order food to your cell, like Hagelslag. Dutch prison is pretty relaxing and guards are pretty nice. Everyone there knows it’s shit to be locked inside and just wants to make the best of it. And guards just don’t want too much of a hassle. You also get one third sentence reduction if you behave, which is really easy in Dutch prison.

My survival strategy would be to not ever get into a position where I owe anyone money (stay away from drugs especially). Do not keep anything valuable that can be stolen. And try to get some sort of job. If you're in a worker cellhouse, you deal with a lot less shit. Finally, I'd keep my mouth shut about everything I see going on and do everything I could not to attract attention to myself or cellmates.
You do all that, you're unlikely to get victimized.

This sounds better than normal life in America, at this point.

Based, thanks fren.

Yeah, it probably is

big herc is a real nigga

I was watching a Danish movie (Pusher 2), and the opening scenes are in a prison and it didn't even register as a prison to me, I thought it was a halfway house or dorm rooms or something until the guards showed up. Seriously, I've seen worse college dorms in America than Danish prison.

I heard that some Scandinavian prisons even have a sauna. In Netherlands I heard a story of a rich prisoner who wanted to swim every morning and he asked the guards if he could have a pool installed. The guards said sure, as long as you pay for it yourself. He asked to use the phone and called and had a company install a swimming pool.

4 months for aggravated assault.
I had my own 2 bed cell for half my stay because i caused a ruckus when they tried to force a fish i didnt like into my cell if you dont get along dont bother being cellies raise hell with the guards and they will be forced comply to avoid me trying to murder the guy.
I had my own toilet(separate room) and my own shower, a fridge and tv with cable.
Dinner was good but the bread wasnt ovened quite enough and gave you gas like hell.
3/4 of my unit where there for murder good chaps got along eerily well according to my supervising officer.
They cut a junkies medicine 2 weeks before release and he went mental in the kitchen and assaulted randoms.
Never show respect to guards or they think they can throw any faggot into the cell with you.
Had an overall great time, most of the guards where fresh easily scared little shits and i threathened at least half of them.
Still got early release, fuck this guillible globohomo shithole.

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this is what happens your first night in

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The pusher trilogy is based on true stories.