/uhg/ - Ukraine Happening General: #1069 (formerly #1068)

Prev: ▶Day 29
▶Daily battlefield assessment isw.pub/RusCampaignMar23
▶Map
map.army/?ShareID=1009776&UserType=RO-Lb4GEQgw

▶Latest
>ISW: "Russian forces continue to go over to the defensive, conducting restricted and localized ground attacks that make little progress
>Russia is likely struggling to obtain fresh combat power from Syria and elsewhere rapidly."
>New Ukrtelecom disruptions due to fiber optic damages
>RU failing to maintain defensive positions east and northeast of Kyiv
>israeli sources claim Shoigu tried as a western spy
>Zelensky asked US to hold sanctions against Abramovich because he can be useful as a "mediator in negotiations"
>US government formally accuses RU forces of war crimes in Ukraine
>RU defence minister Sergei Shoigu vanishes ‘with heart problems’
>Putin adviser Chubais quits over UA war and leaves Russia
>Smoke over RU embassy in Poland
>Anti-RU cauldron forming west of Kyiv
>Mariupol skirmishes continue
>CCP supporting both sides of the conflict, seemingly playing 2 sides
>Putin says RU military operation in Ukraine is a 'success'

▶Livestreams
youtube.com/watch?v=ek1bqrms6ls
youtube.com/watch?v=911cntbvPBU
▶Telegram Channels
rentry.org/telosint
t.me/s/strelkovii
▶INTELLIGENCE
web.archive.org/web/20220321131726/https://www.kp.ru/online/news/4672522 (RU state source as of 21 March: 9,861 Russian army soldiers died in Ukraine and 16,153 were injured)
odin.tradoc.army.mil/WEG (equipment explorer)
understandingwar.org/publications (unbiased defence analysis, 2 reports a day)
oryxspioenkop.com/2022/02/attack-on-europe-documenting-equipment.html ( github.com/leedrake5/Russia-Ukraine )
twitter.com/Skawtish
twitter.com/Osinttechnical
twitter.com/Militarylandnet

▶/uhg/ OP Template
rentry.org/uhg2022

Attached: absolutely banan.png (512x512, 506.24K)

Other urls found in this thread:

t.me/s/strelkovii
jsomonline.org/jsomstorefront/index.php?rt=product/product&product_id=2536
nytimes.com/video/world/europe/100000008266864/russia-army-radio-makariv.html
pastebin.com/hYQgrX8r
pastebin.com/3ZhPpZ3p
twitter.com/UAWeapons/status/1506749854315421704
twitter.com/UAWeapons/status/1506768742516154373
twitter.com/UAWeapons/status/1506754257042776066
twitter.com/AnonBabble

Hello /cvg/ discord comrades
Are we taking our sixth gazillion super McDonalds Kawasaki Pfizer booster shot before or after the Cope of Kiev nukes Moscow into oblivion?
We're winning hard anyway so we might as well take our needed boost comrades.

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Russia is planning to attack the Western Ukraine.

thanks baker
>368923568

>UK sending 6000 more ATGMs

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Where's the ukie that was gonna give me qrd on the space runes?

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We had a good run Shoigubros. Might as well become lavrovlads for the time being.

/uhg/ supports trans rights!

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>There is a realistic possibility that Ukrainian forces are now able to encircle Russian units in Bucha and Irpin.

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i sleep so well recently knowing Ukraine is getting its asshole stretched by Russian orangutans. Thank you Putin

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hey gerasimov, i just jumped in this ww2 tank, where the fuck is the fuel????

Show flag, Ivan Ivansky

I want encirclement to be real just to wittiness levels of cope and seethe vatniks will show if it turns to be true

Break out the tactical crayons!

send de next wabe

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This one?

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What could it be? I don't know what the army has. Feel like if it was NLAWs they would have just siad NLAWs...

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I am a retarded burger but can can Ukrainians read Russian and vice-versa, kind of like how Croatians and Serbians do?

Yeah, patients fucking love that shit
Opiates, propofol and diazepam feel good too
Not as wacky as ketamine however obviously
Ketamine - no, I'm too spooked to do it without someone watching over me
Did get picrelated though

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Does it really matter if they have 20,000 men to throw at the Ukrainian line, and more Russian forces to the north to break it?

>The Armed Forces of the DPR are gradually advancing everywhere, however, the Armed Forces of Ukraine regularly counterattack.
>And if things go on like this, - by mid-April there will simply be no "personnel" Armed Forces of the DPR
>they will simply not physically remain.
>There is still no mobilization and its preparation is not even heard. And without it, this war cannot be won.
Yes it sure sounds like the Russians are winning
t.me/s/strelkovii

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Is this whole "cauldron" thing real or is it a larp?
Will we see a big ukrainian army chunk humiliatingly surrendering in east?

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>surrounded

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Ivan did you forgot to bring your own fuel? It was all written in instruction that t34 fuel is not included.

>can Ukrainians read Russian
the ones that never read it before - no, very barely
>and vice-versa
see above

of course he will say that, he wants nato gibs. literal azovs are in his parliament though

you realize the world has a faggot tree problem, right?

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The Russians want to form the pretext that "the Ukrainians truly did genocide all the Republic men, we have no choice but to avenge the fallen."

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look at this lad

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just draw more blue lines bro

You should be giving out vials of TXA to everyone.

Don't be a bigot, we don't use that word here

That was an unclassified map cleared to show a journalist, so ...

is shoigu really so retarded that he didn't realise why he was there or that he was expendable?

like from azov

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>BREAKING Greece will supply Ukraine an experimental stealth drone

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so the 2nd most powerful army is struggling now for a month to fight with a tranny army kek

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Derussification of the republics going well

It's further apart than Balkan stuff(it's literally one language), but usually yes(for Russians understanding Ukrainian; for Ukrainians understanding Russians it's literally 100% because of historical reasons)

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>post photos
Not really stealth now, is it?

oh neat.

shoigus daughter is attention whoring on instagram. I highly doubt her dad is in danger

fuck and where is the ammo, no rations, no clothes, but the plan says 3 days, so i guess its fine

fine will just piss in the tank, my body is mostly vodka anyway

>t. George Floyd

russia's superpower is having billionaire oligarchs and dirt poor fieldshitters at the same time. no one does it better

what the fuck is a random person with no IV access and supposed active bleeding that needs TQ/bandaging/surgical hemostasis gonna do with TXA

They have no medical supplies too, only guaze rolls.

that its a possibility and groundwork is being laid is real, but that doesn't mean that it will happen. minor advances have been made on the west of kiev that have the potential to turn into an encirclement if things go wall

Computer translate this ape NATO faggot gibberish.

"Russia is in control of Hostomel and has been for weeks we are now forced to admit"

Not everyday your experimental product gets actual data on performance in a modern war scenario.

Probably NLAW and javelins

>wankel engine
>stealth
Suuuuure

Chadrov is the light user, he is invincible

>Did get picrelated though
very addictive, yeah?

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California

He tried to reach kyiv

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>Ketamine - no, I'm too spooked to do it without someone watching over me
Afraid of OD or what?

Чyбaйc yжe в Typции, Фpидмaнy пoблoчили вce cчeтa и oн плaчeтcя, чтo eмy тeпepь нaдo caмoмy дoмa yбиpaтьcя и oтчитывaтьcя пepeд пpaвитeльcтвoм UK, Дepипacкa пpoдoлжaeт плaкaтьcя в тeлeгe. Пpo дpyгих ocoбo ничeгo нe cлышaл, нo я дyмaю дoвoльных тaм нeтy, нo видимo вce oни ccyтcя, нe хoтят кaк Heмцoв зaкoнчить.

Sell it, there is always a bigger moron after all.

Is that the best cope you have left

What the fuck is he rambling about "Polish expeditionary corps". What are wo going to send? Entire 2 patriots batteries as AA? Or flatten Russians with our T72(modernized)? Or hope that used German Leopards will cause enough shock and awe to make vatniks run back to Moscow?
Given the shitshow of Russian army we could probably fight them, but this does not we are ready for war, especially we lack proper anti air.
If NATO wants to send expeditionary forces it should be French, Germans, Italians or any other place where Russia can't launch hit with rockets while us being "neutral" logistic center, conveniently blocking any Russian response.

apnoe and/or vomiting+aspiration

If he was allowed to show this, it's a few days old.

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did he shit himself? also kinda gay to go into war in hotpants

It's proof he still lives in Russia

by April Ukrainians will be waltzing in formation alongside Fred Flintstone into kalibr rockets

Cope the twitter post, Jesus bet the MSM are already running this.

>CITY COUNCIL says Ukrainians are encircling the area
>LOLLL THAT MEANS IT WAR NEVER CONTESTED OR UKRAINIAN IT MUST HAVE BEEN SEEKRITLY RUSSIAN
I only regret I can't hang you in the fog of war

>people in parliament unironically not willing to vote yes for the sending of weapons in ukraine
>yeah uhm, good luck guys, you are fighting a war but we will just pray for your souls here yeah, we are for peace in europe bro
why is it always like this

>Ketamine - no, I'm too spooked to do it without someone watching over me
Its not like you will want to do anything stupid with your brain stem effectively blocked
Try it before the nuclear blast gets us all

are you lost nigger?

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1/2

When the Russian army appears in front of the ZSU, it will be very easy to understand.

The first sign - detonation of ammunition of combat vehicles, flying towers of T-72, automotive equipment destroyed to the ground and disassembled in pieces and a cork fried to a crispy cork burning on the fields of Kherson region corporal Amir Myldygaziev,
called for urgent service from the city of Makhachkala for invasion. Then the largest homeless dog dinner in Ukraine takes place. This system works "we were told that they would meet us with flowers, and hohols don't have an army", the range of action is unlimited.

The second is a complete failure of engines and other aviation systems of Russian combat aircraft and helicopters, early decommissioning and failure of the vital functions of the crew and landing party. This is how the "TRO Fighter with Stinger" system works. The range of action is greater than the US military, who handed us the weapons, could have imagined.

Third - frostbite of the limbs in combination with excess fluid in the lungs, which will lead to fatal cases among Russian airborne troops. This is the system "we are trying to find Odessa on the map of the 80s." The most interesting characteristic of the system is that the Ukrainian military leadership did not know about its existence before the start of the war.

Fourth - sudden annihilation of air defence and ammunition depots, tanks with fuel and lubricants and food supplies of the rear, tens of kilometers in depth from the front line. This is how the system "all Ukrainian aviation and Bayraktars were destroyed in the first hours of the war" works. The radius of action depends on the endurance of the CCO units operating behind the backs of the Russian troops.

Fifth - erasing the memory of the Russian generals about traumatic events that resulted from military actions, which makes them repeat the same actions, which each time lead to pitting. The system bears the name "Chernobaevka".

Best and only decent meme to ever come out of our intelligence establishment. 5 guys post the fucking templates.

You look great. Looks like it was a succes.
Is that fentanyl?
I wanna george floyd myself when im old, and I heard fentanyl is great for this, you wont feel a thing. Is this true?

2/2

Sixth - the failure of the functions of the stomach, liver and intestines of the personnel of the army of the Russian Federation. This is how the "Field Ration 2015" system works. The most interesting thing is that the system was provided to the armed forces of Ukraine for free use by the Minister of Defense of Russia Sergei Shoigy.

And now, when the columns are broken, the rears are destroyed, the offensive is stopped, and the enemy is demoralized by a large number of losses, the mobilized, who survived the last month, come into action and the living will envy the dead...

Fifth columnists, pacifists, faggots exist the world around.

"Look bitch. I can still paddle a fucking canoe to my grans house.........at night. If I'm lucky. Encircled! Get fucked"

You're a fucking idiot.

>Conclusion: There is currently insufficient evidence to support a strong recommendation for or against IM administration of TXA in the combat setting; however, there is an abundance of literature demonstrating efficacy and safety of TXA use in a broad range of patient populations. Balancing the available data and risk- benefit ratio, IM TXA should be considered a viable treatment option for tactical and combat applications.

jsomonline.org/jsomstorefront/index.php?rt=product/product&product_id=2536

why everyone talking only about destroyed mariupol

kharkiv now looks almost the same as mariupol

also "fun fact" in both cities there was some buildings that survived ww2, they now destroyed.

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>day 29
the absolute state of the russian army, at least we got cute ukiechans out of this war

Predict Balkanized Russia

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bad bait

>people in parliament unironically not willing to vote yes for the sending of weapons in ukraine
We already sent them weapons and will send more, wtf are you on?

LOL

nytimes.com/video/world/europe/100000008266864/russia-army-radio-makariv.html

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She has such a chink face. Shoigufags EXPLAIN

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I lazily translated this paste to English more or less

Orig from 2014: pastebin.com/hYQgrX8r
Remastered: pastebin.com/3ZhPpZ3p

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About the same, but with a nuclear crater where Putin's bunker is.

The official claim this as THE BIG GAINS when they released this map.
Somebody saw this and interpret it as 'UA is choking the Russian army in Bucha' and report it wildly.
The whole internet then clamored the same thing.

In Pentagon report they basically stated that there is 'positive movement north of Kyiv'.
I honestly doubt it is anything significant.

okay travel here with a crate of TXA and syringes and distribute that to normies kek

Ukraine gets all the regions with any Ukrainian minorities at all
Then proceed as by your pic

imagine being this much of a MSM mouthpeace and calling russian billionaires oligarchs

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This would make that one Siberian user very happy.

Anyone hear this rumor about Russia blocking off the Kerch strait bridge to prevent Russians from leaving in panic

I think it's because Mariupol looks like it will be captured, while Kharkiv not so much

>Ukrainian, pointing out the gauntlet and cross country hikes to avoid Russian spring break 2022.

You've got hours left to live and you spend them posting lies on an anime board? Jump off your commie block now and save the suffering faggot.

in that pic it’s still swollen though. this is the current state of things. though surgeon said the final look is after half a year. it’s been two month exactly

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>implying Russia has the ability to detect anything

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Yah I know, I can't wait to show him

Kuban back to its rightful owners

Is the Russia-Ukraine conflict really comparable to the Cuban Missile Crisis?

>for Russians understanding Ukrainian
You would be surprised, but that's not always the case. I encountered numerous Russians who cannot understand even widely used words in Ukrainian. Hell, i dated girl from Izhevsk and she would have trouble understanding simple stuff if i switch back to Ukrainian to tell a joke.
There was good quote about Russians only being able to say "we are one people" only in Russian, never in Ukrainian or Belarusian.

>claims Ukraine will be taken in 4 days
>4 weeks later
Bro, you're the one who's delusional.

Thanks for decrypting that!

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Aбpaмoвич вoн тoжe чeт пooбeщaли пoхoдy, дyмaю ecли зa нeдeлю ничeгo тoлкoм нe вoзьмyт бyдyть мopoзить кoнфликт ecли вoзьмyт нopм пpoхoд к Кpимy бyдeт тopг

If they had numbers, they wouldn't have gotten encircled.
Russia is running out of supplies and combat-ready troops.

>We are on the border now, we reckon we will be in Moscow by August latest. Russia has proven a paper tiger and will be chained. T. Zelensky

IIRC isnt ketamine "special" precisely because risk of apshyxiation is way lower compared to traditional anesthesiants?

No, in all likelihood NATO wouldn't station any nukes in Ukraine.

>nytimes.com/video/world/europe/100000008266864/russia-army-radio-makariv.html
the shit is just buffering to me wtf

yeah I guess it is very difficult. how are you even supposed to get into the country to take the second part? I don't think there's a special visa for it, is there? My friend from South America came here as a 'student'. He was taking a full course load even though he was a doctor back home. But if money is the obstacle, there's probably someway to set up a goyfundme or fleece plebbitors for it

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what, they detected your faggotry no problem

Have some etsy person mail you some, mix it up with 2g of TXA per unit and give it to people.

>shells self-destruct immediately
lmao what is this cope

No. Where did YOU hear it?

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You look good. I like it.
How much did you pay?

that's why i said 'usually'
yeah, just make sure you've got enough for a proper OD, so some cunt doesn't manage to 'save' you with CPR so you just become a brain-damaged retard

Ukrainian forces looking over a totally destroyed Russian supply column, with approximately 4 supply trucks and a Tigr-M IMV. Note that ammo is strewn about.
twitter.com/UAWeapons/status/1506749854315421704

russians really are fucking subhumans
it's not a coincidence that hitler spared so many ukrainians in ww2 but killed so many russians and poles, which are the niggers of slavs.

North Korea sending 12000 cope cages.

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Maybe, but that's a pretty big testicle to lop off. Does Ukraine have the men necessary to close the loop before Russians get so desperate as to lash out like wild animals?

here how it looked before both surgeries.
overall cost - 2k dollars but my insurance covered all the medication and tests otherwise it would be closer to 3k

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She is mongoloid. Shoigu is mongoloid and was born in Tuva which is mongoloid region. Russia big.

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>apnoe and/or vomiting+aspiration
>mfw did ketamine once, unsupervised
Lucky me. Funny how none of the junkies knew about the dangers, and they were very cautious otherwise.

my favorite part of that pic is the implication that somewhere on earth will be safe from WW3

oлигapхи кoтopыe зa пpeдeлaми paхи ничeгo нe мoгyт cдeлaть и нe зaхoтят дeлaть. нa зaпaдe oни кoмфopтнo живyт дaжe пoд пoлными caнкциями. вoн фpидмaн вpoдe пoлyчaeт пocoбиe 3000 дoллapoв в мecяц. eмy кaк бы пoхyй. oн в мoлoдocти жил в coвкe и кaк и вce был нищeнкoй. пpocтo дeд вcпoмнит мoлoдocть eщe и cпacибo cкaжeт зa тaкoe пpиключeниe.

чтoтo мoгyт и вoзмoжнo зaхoтят cдeлaть тoлькo oлигapхи кoтopыe пo кaкимлибo пpичинaм ocтaлиcь внyтpи paшки

An abandoned Russian tow truck somewhere, apparently in good condition.
twitter.com/UAWeapons/status/1506768742516154373

chastity belts

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Yes and I've never seen it happen personally, but 'what if'

I will be

Im already a brain-damaged retard, kek.
Where can i get fentanyl? Can i just straight up ask a anesthetician for it?

Yeah, I just post it for giggles. It doesn't even look like Zelensky. Like a Droopy-Dog version of Rod Serling.

Be it said, SOME models predict the Southern Hemisphere would be mostly fine. Australia's going to be laughing at all our corpses.

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>in other news scrap metal prices at an all time low! THERE'S JUST SO MUCH OF IT!

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T-72B3 tank likely captured by Ukrainian forces recently
twitter.com/UAWeapons/status/1506754257042776066

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why would you perform surgery on a perfectly normal nose lmao. fucking faggots these days i swear

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Хoтeл бы я пoвepить, нo дeд пoхoдy тoлькo c cилoвым блoкoм тeпepь oбщaeтcя, a эти eбaнyтыe мoгyт и ядepкoй пиздaнyть и мoгилизaцию нaчaть. Teм бoлee oтcтyпaть eмy yжe нeкyдa.

you welcome!

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My buddy OD'd on ketamine
He thought he was shooting up amphetamines, but it was ketamine

Knocked out in a few seconds, but then he just chilled out drooling on the chair for a few hours no problem. Don't worry about it.

if all 13000 nukes get launched, one will be pointed at you just for the fuck of it.

Uh-oh copemap sisters we got too cocky

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>Encircled
>Source: UKR MoD
Lmfaooo

nice revenge for 8 years of genocide in Donbass