Satan cured my illness

Satan cured my illness

I don't want to go to hell =(
How do I convince Satan to stop summoning succubuses and curing me and shit this is top tier gay, I would rather die obviously

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I've tried reading, I've tried praying, ive tried doing nothing, I've tried spreading Christianity, I've tried openly cursing his name, he won't stop helping me.

He gave me a magic watch that can answer any question with true or false, and while it was in my possession, it was never wrong.

Maybe a guy might wonder how a watch could predict how a conversation would go. Maybe a guy might wonder why he woke up at exactly 11:11am today. I want off this ride. Life has been nothing but pain, but that's no excuse to go to hell.

>while it was in my possession
Where this watch is now?

Satan tried to convince me that we do not have free will, and that we are already in hell.

Not politics. Fuck off.

First of all: did you do a some gay ass ritual? Did you try to sell your soul? If so you might be in luck since technically you don’t even own your soul to begin with as it’s a gift and the one thing you can’t do is sell it. Read bhagavad gita, if they are right, it’s literally made retard proof because our creator knew we needed it to be. What my guess is, is that since you are literally unable to pay whatever entity they are taking other things most likely energy beyond what you would normally emit. And since they do deals you can be sure they have intrest rates that can’t be realistically “paid off”. They could also possibly take additional “wealth” away from you as in what would cost 20 dollars is now thirty for you.

My advice is to turn to god, and maybe do charity work and other good deeds, take good care of yourself and you might be able to “write it off” with a temporary excess of whatever they are taking. Don’t try to borrow from another source in order to pay off this debt, that would be the most retarded thing you could do.

Not truly versed in all this but that makes sense in my head.

I threw it against the wall a bunch of times till it broke because I was an angry virgin LOL. Whatever. I never had it in me to use it to rape, even though it continuously told me to.

Ah I see, been there done that. Just ride it out, avoid drugs for now. Don’t get cocky and arrogant and say blasphemous things because you will regret it later. Chill out and smoke a cigarette. Give it half a year atleast and re-asses then.

I'm very sick and have no money, finding employment has been a challenge. I have excuses for everything. Also I had a dream where I literally signed a contract with the devil, but I didn't actually feel in control of it so I'm pretty sure he was just fucking with me.

HEY WATCH SHOULD I RAPE A GIRL TONIGHT?

oh what the fuck, it's 22 seconds into 2:22 am

Why yes I do believe confessing my sins will protect me

I'm fighting every day for my life. There is no chilling out for me. He keeps my constantly on edge. I would literally kill myself if I didn't think that would dig my hole even deeper.

Rape is cringe when thought about more thoroughly, nothing but a power trip combined with a mediocre orgasm culminating in a meh experience. Are you willing to throw your life away for a “meh”.

Enjoy hell

If you sin with the idea an immediate confession will save you, it will not. Also, rape is cringe. Don't be that woman's satan in which you fear so much

Rape would be amazing dude, I want to have sex too, what the fuck I'm almost 30 dude =(

Still won't do it, but it's tempting as fuck obviously. Too scared lol.

That is exactly what am trying to avoid my guy. Why do you hate me? Im poor, sick and alone. The devil is my only friend. Can it get much worse?

You are correct in your assumption that suicide will fuck you even harder. Have you tried... not taking it so seriously? So what if you die? It’s just death. Not saying you shouldn’t fight but I say disregard the outcome. Laugh it away and realize it’s all a big joke. Oh and when the intrusive thoughts come and even if they make sense in your head ask yourself “is this thought cringe?” It might prevent you from making really stupid mistakes and decisions.

Captcha: t000y

Taking it less seriously isn't an option, Satan and the lord are always present. They are always fucking here, they are never not here. What else is there to do but whine and complain and be afraid.

I’m younger and a perma virgin but I have surmised that sex is grossly overrated just as alcohol and that only by it’s acceptance of society and it’s relatively “easy to get” nature and requirement for offspring people have sex at all. I doubt a fentanyl addict is very concerned about whether he can have sex. You will never reach the pleasure that is depicted and promised by porn and media, it is a hoax, it will not solve anything and it will only make the void inside more expansive. Do not believe whatever society told you and what normal people try to convince you of. Put your trust in god and the bible and live by a very simple “try not to be a piece of shit” and you’ll be mostly fine or atleast you won’t be as bad as most people

Like I said, smoke a cigarette, laugh and enjoy the ride. What is happening to you can be compared to a first timer on a roller coaster desperately trying to get off the ride as it’s ascending, nothing wrong with that, be aware you will go down aswel. Now imagine if you’ve been on that same ride for 300 times already, you will be bored out your mind and care so little it will be a new type of suffering altogether .

>Ughhhhhhhhh user, fuck me more, you feel so good
Can't wait for you to be almost 30 years old and still loveless, you'll go mad! Easy target for Satan. Didn't this post turn your gut inside out?

Hey look at the time, it's 12:22, another very interesting fucking coincidence

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ya fucked up and I'm willing to bet someone warned you against exactly what is happening, you are a fucking dummy

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I'm worse than all my neighbour's, all I wanna do is whine and complain. You type exactly like Satan

test 2

Feeling sleepy and anxious, look at this terrible thread I just made

fr. its never fulfilling enough. ive been on and off nofap and what keeps me going is how unfulfilling and "meh" the orgasm is. it just makes the horny feeling go away.