Tfw meet some trans girl

>tfw meet some trans girl
>they seem nice, antivaxxer and le based + redpilled
>eventually invite them over to my house, for some reason I act super femininely towards them and all that
>somehow get to playing truth or dare with them
>she eventually asks what's in my bottom drawer - which has my arm warmers and wig because I am le closet troon
>show her, even wear them and ask her if I look feminine - she says I kinda do, and I feel good
>she leaves
>i now feel terrible and resentful and I want to kill her and kill myself, particularly that second one
what thE FUCK is my FUKCING PROBLEM

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should've gotten the vax chud

well don’t take it out on her for goodness sake

you will catch covid and end on a vent before you ever screw up the courage to take hrt

i won't but like, I think I'm going to kill myself tonight.
>you will catch covid and end on a vent
lol
>screw up the courage to take hrt
already have

Why would you like somebody more because they were anti-vaccine? That sounds retarded

user you should not post something like this
Please user, for her and your sake, don't do it
Please just forget about it, pray to God and get help

There are cultists everywhere friend
user, I'm in great pain and misery - I cannot ignore these feelings of agony any further.

Vaxxoids are fuck8ng retarded sheep.
>still mentioning the vent meme in current year of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ

I've experienced feelings like this around other queers, not to the point of wanting to hurt others or myself but a lot of self loathing and resentment, comparing myself to them. It came on faster than I was able to process and I became somewhat overwhelmed. Took me a few days to sort myself out. You go through life thinking you're making the best choices, and then you see others who made completely different choices and they're so much happier and more at peace with themselves and you feel judged, invalidated, and desperate for some kind of assurance that you're a real person and not just a long con where the only victim is yourself.

Fuck, I know. I fucking hate myself.

repressor chaser pipeline is too real

>antivaxxer and le based + redpilled
>even wear them and ask her if I look feminine - she says I kinda do, and I feel good
>i now feel terrible and resentful and I want to kill her and kill myself

a tale as old as time

>vaxx injection bad!
>HRT injection good!
lol

Woah antivaxxers are incels?
I'm so shocked, dumbfounded even, wow what a development

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i don't even like her because she's trans. to be honest, she really looks like a dude above all else - cute little dirt mustache, hairy legs, she's a bit stronger than me even and at least 4 inches taller. She also barely showers, and she smells.

just transition already

Actually I take some of that back. I filed this memory away but I recall taking the long way home, the very very long way home, and doing some aggressively risky and pointless things that could have gotten me maimed or killed. I wasn't consciously thinking of hurting myself, I was just overwhelmed with confusion and anger and acting like a schizo or a druggie or something. Eventually I made it home and just lay in bed and screamed a lot.

>eventually invite them over to my house, for some reason I act super femininely towards them and all that
>somehow get to playing truth or dare with them
>she eventually asks what's in my bottom drawer - which has my arm warmers and wig because I am le closet troon
>show her, even wear them and ask her if I look feminine - she says I kinda do, and I feel good
In other words you transparently telegraphed that you had some gender hmmm stuff going on, engineered the situation so that she picked up on the fact that you had a secret box of gay, and her being queer herself got what you were trying to do and encouraged you and acted supportive. I'm gonna vote no on murder-suicide and suggest as an alternative maybe sending her a text thanking her for being cool?

I mean fuck
I made near genuine threats to kill her on fucking tf2

"in a videogame" defense applies