i hate how this overrides everything and makes me act like a disgusting beast. i feel like an orc. i hate being a man i fucking hate this. i fucking hate masculinity i masturbate to suppress my male sexuality and my masculine desire to fuck women with my cock. every time i don't masturbate for too long i just suddenly start wanting to fuck women. i hate this. why can't i want to be fucked in the pussy (that i don't have) when i'm like this? why do i have to be this disgusting ape obsessed with conquest and brute force and violence
no matter how much i say i want to take my pills or be a woman, when it comes down to it, my male brain reigns supreme and tells that part to shut the fuck up when it's time to coom. i honestly just wish i were gay or a woman. i don't ever want to date a woman, but my body tells me my entire life's purpose is to be a fucking brute ape who's entire purpose in life is to fuck them.
there's a part of me is a bottom and into guys, but that part is instantly destroyed every time my brain gets horny. being a cis man is suffering
If you take your pills it’ll at least suppress your libido or make your sex drive more passive?
Connor Miller
how much of your sexuality does testosterone control? it definitely controls your arousal, but if i get horny on estrogen i'm afraid i might still have the same brain wiring that makes me like this (this is my honscience explanation for transbian tops?)
i'm 80% straight male 10% AGP 10% homosexual. my mind is set on perceiving myself as a man but most trans women have lifelong dysphoria and are at least 80% AGP or 80% homosexual. even among the obvious trenders and faketrans none of them are more than 5% straight male to start with
my hope with these damn pills is that estrogen can rewire the straight man out of my brain and completely replace it with AGP. if i start feeling a phantom vagina and make it so that i can only orgasm through imagining myself getting fucked or being a woman i would legitimately feel better about myself than being a straight man.
i feel like a fucking ape.
Joshua Long
You are a pathetic fucking retard if this isn't bait
Joshua Roberts
Well I can kind of relate to this stuff but I can't relate to the wanting to fuck women It is pretty horrifying when you're horny and you just NEED to masturbate to pornography It disgusted me when I felt drawn to women's bodies and it disgusted me when people talked about sex and everything I became so angry about fat men who didn't shave, men who needed to masturbate, men who were sex obsessed, etc so I took pills to castrate myself I can recommend it
Austin Perry
Mental illness
Jack Wood
i am not baiting. i constantly switch back and forth between wishing that i were a woman and furiously jerk myself off like a dumb moid >You are a pathetic fucking retard if this isn't bait i agree, but i want to hear why you think so
>I can't relate to the wanting to fuck women there's nothing wrong with women being attracted to women lesbians exist after all, i just hate the masculine way that i think about sex >it disgusted me when people talked about sex and everything it's not disgust i just don't relate. guys talk about relationship issues and i literally can't relate because i can't imagine dating a woman. and guys talking about sex is the most boring thing ever. the moment anyone says anything slightly more interesting than "oh this girl is hot" someone gets insecure and turns it back to just talking about women they want to fuck
Ethan Hughes
You only wish to be a woman because you were molested as a child or watched too much anime.
Gabriel Hughes
>molested as a child or watched too much anime. neither of these canned responses apply to me
Evan Morgan
I mean you are aware the problem is your mind and what you were exposed to as a youth and not men in general right? Jewish media is promoting neoteny and androgyny.
Jaxon Carter
don't think that's it but it doesn't matter at this point. masculinity felt like a stupor, it just felt wrong, it still does. i don't understand how men can be like this and feel okay with themselves i honestly feel more alive with these feelings than without
Hudson Ortiz
That's not how it works. I had extremely high T levels pre hrt (1260 ng/dl), but I never had sex and masturbated maybe half a dozen times in a whole year. T is only 1 part of what makes you horny, you cant blame it
James Moore
why do you "feel like an orc" specifically? I guess I don't understand why men are repulsed by their masculinity. is it feel like you're hounded by your bodily urges or something else about it? or a mixture?
Landon Brooks
I tried to stop being a coomer to convince myself to take estrogen, but really I had to take estrogen to convince myself to stop being a coomer. Try it out, your dick won’t stop working or making less coom right away.
Jace Morales
Also, to add to this, cooming can be addictive. It’s especially addictive because it focuses your brain in a way that melts away your anguish over being male. I became a lot more accepting of my transness when I stopped treating being a coomer like a character flaw, but rather an addiction that I relied on to numb my shame. youtu.be/rzJ21OpFnZ0
Mason Campbell
you're ugly and brutish and smelly and oily and hairy. you're everything society says is scary and gross and unattractive. meanwhile you're expected implicitly to be the most mentally "well-adjusted" (an unemotional rock) and be hard workers or you have no intrinsic worth as a human being. you are a disgusting worker drone and you have original sin for even being male and have to be apologetic about it because "yes all men". you struggle to find a mate, so you do everything you've ever been told to find one - be strong, independent, assertive, dominant, masculine - and any appearance of weakness or femininity denigrates your chances immediately. you never allow yourself to be weak or feminine around others because you don't want anyone to think you're that way, and none of you are socialized for intimacy because of it, so you have no emotional intimacy outside of a mate, which you have to posture to get (at the cost of all of the above), which you then also have to be an infallible rock for. you are disposable at all times. your expertise may be trusted above that of a woman's, but never your word, who have the final say in how your already-precarious social support system stands. why do men feel repulsed by it all? well, it's easy.
Luke Baker
how did your sex drive change after HRT? what were your new levels?
>I guess I don't understand why men are repulsed by their masculinity their masculinity? i don't think most men are. but a lot of guys don't like being coomers because they feel like sex is a distraction or a waste of time >why do you "feel like an orc" specifically? because that's how being horny and sex feels like as a male. there's no real fun in it, it's just an impulse i have to take care of. i feel way more emotionally satisfied thinking about being with men or being a woman, but when i'm horny all of those feelings go away and get replaced with the stupid biological urge to fuck and dominate and all the other masculine things that just feel awful to me
William Reyes
I see. I always appreciate insight. I will say that (overwhelmingly) males made and still make/run the overall system that is in place so it, of course, falls to them to challenge it. I can't say that I have ever seen much in the way of (male) brotherhood that I assumed existed from reading and watching media growing up. all I've ever really heard is that males are lonely among one another. their sense of class unity (male sex class) is strong but there is not an emotional feeling of belonging to my understanding.
that viable semen can be taken and used successfully for up to 36 hours after death - from an outright corpse, not a brain dead but heart beating patient - reinforces your feelings. nature did make males work/labor horses and also reproductively an aside. however, from the number of times I have caught other males expressing similar things online it strikes me that males really do not grasp their attractiveness. it's difficult to step outside of oneself but it's not that males are unattractive. it's that what's attractive about you is exactly what makes you lethal. it's a tense sex to be attracted to but it's definitely there.
Joseph Powell
>you're everything society says is scary and gross And who controls society?
>nature did make males work/labor horses which is not a good feeling.
>their sense of class unity (male sex class) is strong i don't think so. men don't care for other men. but they judge other men for their character while they judge women for their womanhood
>it strikes me that males really do not grasp their attractiveness. i do not want to be a man. i find many men attractive even though i do not want to be them.
Isaiah Sanchez
This was one of the reasons I took HRT. I wanted to fucking castrate myself because my sexuality had such control over me. Jerking off to porn like a complete monkey. Only after HRT can I just relax, not want to look at porn and seek out what I really want which is relationships with men. I hate being a tranny but god it was fucking depressing being such a coomer ape and I'm glad its over.
Henry Morales
>I wanted to fucking castrate myself because my sexuality had such control over me. aren't you afraid that you're suppressing something innate about you? >seek out what I really want which is relationships with men. i have only ever felt anything resembling intimacy for men, yet my moid brain tells me i must fuck women...
Evan Roberts
>don't think most men are. true, I was just attempting to more or less say male/masculine attributes in a broad view is all. >because that's how being horny and sex feels like as a male. not that anyone asked but that sounds how I get right before I menstruate. it's relentless when it's like that. I once asked someone if, when he sleeps and has the normal sleep erections, is it ever uncomfortable. he said yes, "sometimes it's like I want to ram it into a wall." as in, being in that half-asleep state, him so overcome with the need to relieve that it was bordering on intolerable.
Dominic Scott
I do.
Jordan Morris
Shalom
Adrian Wright
>there's a part of me is a bottom and into guys, but that part is instantly destroyed every time my brain gets horny Are you making any conscious effort to nurture it?
Blake Mitchell
I imagine it is not a good feeling, no. men don't care for other men from what I have seen - but they absolutely ally up with them and universally agree about the "woman question" if you will. they have class solidarity with each other, not caring.
what can one do? I'm not trying to start anything but sex is not truly able to be changed. oh, just thought of something. it could harm you, however. spearmint tea/spearmint capsules blunt androgens. I think it could genuinely hurt your bodily health since you are male but spearmint is recommended for females with PCOS.
