How do i stop being turned on by men

i swear to god, i see myself as a girl and i want to be fucked by a big, strong guy but i'm not trans, i'm probably just bi or gay

i would say i am 95% attracted to guys and like 5% to girls, maybe
i get hard when thinking about men no problem, always
i want to feel a man push inside me while i wrap my legs around him and feel him thrust into me, fucking me into submission
i want to be as weak and as girly as possible for him, jesus christ

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Why would you think you're trans user?, you're just gay

because i also feel really shit about my body and being seen as a man

cute

what’s the problem

i can't get on hrt because i will be a hon and my parents would disown me

Don't be such a stupid boy. You're just bi or gay or something, like you said. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be feminine, dork.

Be my gf OP! I'll treat you like a girl but we can keep it a secret and make you feel reaaaaally good.

would they disown you if you started to date a boy?

yes

well then you either live a lie in all respects or roll the dice and see if you can be happy

>i would say i am 95% attracted to guys and like 5% to girls, maybe
it'll be 95% girls 5% guys once your meta-attraction wears off.

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yeah that's what i would like most
just keeping the relationship secret

Yolo

so to everyone else, you and him are just best buds
but when you go over to his place, you change into lingerie and he rails your bussy
then holds you in his strong arms while calling you his beautiful sweetheart
and then it’s back to just being bros, huh?

We can do that. Let's indulge secretly in your little gay fantasies and tell no one. I do that too.

yes, perfect scenario ugggggh
but only if we both keep it secret, i bet it's just as embarassing for him as it is for me
i don't feel bad about being a secret since he's being a secret too

Umm, date me. Now.

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i'm not cute like brigitte tho

Idc you are cute date me
We will never tell ANYONE our homo secret

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This is exactly what I want in a boyfriend. I want to absolutely fuck every last bit of manhood out of him and reduce his sexual identity to a fuck toy for a real man. I want to feminize and keep him girly and submissive while also not letting him troon out. I want him to be the very definition of a "failed male" and constantly remind him of that.
You wouldn't happen to live somewhere in the balkans right?