My birthday is next month and I'm planning to 50% then. I have 2 weeks left. I haven't hinted at it to anyone I know...

I don't bering it up because when I did my old friends bullied me and abandoned me at my worst lol. Its a curse. The best you can do is not waste peoples time.

you had either shitty or immature friends.
People come to me to vent about their issues and it's just fine. I don't replace a therapist though in bad cases.

Cut you off what? Can't you self-med?

I don't know fully. I think I brought up I was moving states at some point and he just cut me off. I think he assumed I was moving that day but it was more like I told im months in advance and specified. Regardless I tried to pic up my perscription in the same state? This gay also told me some weird shit like taking too much estrogen would cause my body to vonvrt it to testosterone.

I did but it took time. I nneded to get a new doctor entrily. He itterally ghosted me for 3 months even through I tried to reach out to him every week.

Egg his house

Tfw order stuff on greymarket and have it in two weeks. It's not that hard OP.

I'm sorry that happened to you. That's not a good reason to kill yourself though. Please just get the meds you need and make it on your own. You don't need these idiots.

Noo yeah my first friend group just heard my issues and bullied me harder, They never talked abut there personal lives. They aso heard me talk about my trans issues from someone and would physically bully me for being gay. My other group just bullied me adnd stright up abandoned me when they heard I might be trans from a nb person. The nb was trying to help but they made it worse yeah.

that's weird and fucked up. Glad you can diy now.

No yeah I do diy now while going to a doctor. I keep the meds they give me as backup. I'm legit terrified to trust a doctor now.

That's awful. Sorry that happened to you. They were not true friends, and you deserve true friends.

He had bad reviews online but I just went with him when because I was stupid.

I will be your friend OP

I was bullied a lot and had a really hard life, I can understand and we can talk.

you're surrounded by shitty people, poor girl. But seriously, you need to talk to people. And not allow yourself to be taken advantage of. You CAN get better. You will need to find the right crowd but they exist

Tbh I've been better off alone. Litterally no need to waste time getting close to anyone. Poeple are monsters thrugh and through. Same thing with my parents , just abusive hateful racist fucks. My father used to tell me how he'd bash trannies with his friends in his youth.

If you want to give up and loose all hope, that’s entirely your right to do so. It’s not as easy as you think to follow through with action though. I’ve tried to kill myself at least once every 5-10 years, I still think about it sometimes, but it’s a thousand times easier to open up to somebody about it than to actually pull the trigger.

You should consider at least opening up to somebody before you try it, even if you think they find you annoying. It makes it a hell of a lot easier to follow through if they confirm all your fears about how people view you, trust me. But more than likely, they’ll try to talk you out of it, or at least express how traumatizing and horrible it would be for them if you took your own life. I’ve had enough people I care about in this world kill themselves to know that I never want to try it ever again.

Life is always worth living because there’s always a chance that you’ll learn or experience something so special or earth shattering that you’ll have no choice but to enjoy it. All I ask is that you talk to at least one person about how your feeling before you regret what you’ve done halfway through bleeding out in a bathtub, chocking on the end of a rope, or halfway down a 50 story building. If you’re really going to do it though, buy a gun, and a shotgun at that, you don’t want to miss.

I'm a bit to old for this. My good years are either past me or currently happening. Like fr what's the point? You know? So I can transition at 24 and live a live of regret and pain?

You're literally about to kill yourself. You're not better off alone. You need the love and support you deserve. You need people to cherish you for exactly who you are, and I promise you, there are people who will. You just have to find them. So don't give up, okay?

Sorry. I still have a gross man voice. I can't talk to new people ina vc.

Ngl 30s are much better than 20s, except it may get more tricky to meet large crowds of new people on a yearly basis.