Isn't "coming out" culture harmful and toxic to an already incredibly vulnerable group of minorities?

Isn't "coming out" culture harmful and toxic to an already incredibly vulnerable group of minorities?
Wouldn't it be safer and better if we normalized a culture of silently cutting off contact with problem families instead of forcing people to out themselves to hateful people just so they're "valid" as their gender/sexuality?

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>Wouldn't it be safer and better if we normalized a culture of silently cutting off contact with problem families instead of forcing people to out themselves to hateful people just so they're "valid" as their gender/sexuality?

No. Because isolation destroys you. Everyone thinks they are the exception to the rule , but humans are social by nature. Left alone we mentally self destruct. You just need to learn how to set boundaries with people and accept that some people will be part of your life but always at arms length to protect yourself.

I don't see how that contradicts op
They're just saying if your bio family is garbage, it's ok to just move on and rebuild your social environment
In big cities there are lots of people who have done exactly that, usually refugees from christofascist villages in bumfuck flyover shit holes

There's more people in your life than blood relatives.

>Isn't "coming out" culture
What the fuck does this mean? You mean telling people that you are gay? That's a "culture" now?
Being closeted is generally quite miserable. People still hate you but don't even know they need to do it behind your back. Closeted LGBT are less happy on average than open LGBT,

>Wouldn't it be safer and better if we normalized a culture of silently cutting off contact with problem families
You can, but you can also cut people off and give them a reason why. Different people have different levels of "problem families". Absolute true, schizo, right wing families who hate their own children are not the norm.

>forcing people to out themselves to hateful people just so they're "valid" as their gender/sexuality?
Not a thing and never has been

Not saying people shouldn't cut toxic family. Just that lots of people are too scared to be themselves and run rather than face their family. Silently cutting off contact is a pussy move. Best to face your family and get the closer you only get one shot at getting. Too many people just assume they will be rejected and end up abandoning a support structure they need.

>cut people off and give them a reason why
Why though? You don't owe them one, and them being your next of kin and otherwise legally tied to you can still fuck you over if they want to. No contact is always the safest route out of abusive situations like unaccepting families. Confrontation is always the least safe.

You can and should cut off with toxic people, even if they are blood-related

If your family makes you want to run away from them instead of be yourself around them, you have an emotionally abusive family. Always.

>Too many people just assume they will be rejected and end up abandoning a support structure they need.
When does this ever happen? OP is asking why the exact opposite is the norm, which it is. Having to come out before you're socially "allowed to" abandon a shitty family is exactly what they mean when they call it a culture.

>Why though? You don't owe them one,
Uh huh. I said you "CAN". It's healthier to have conflicts in the open where they can be worked through if necessary. And the "YoU DoNt OWe tHeM" bullshit makes you sound like an idiot. Life and relationships and society are not about what you "owe".

>No contact is always the safest route out of abusive situations like unaccepting families. Confrontation is always the least safe.
Wrong. It CAN be but often is not especially if you are using the broadest sense of "unaccepting families". A LOT is covered under "unaccepting families". If your family is willing to shelter you if you fall into privation, drive you to a chemo appointment if you get sick, and fill up your prison account if you are incarcerated. they are worth keeping around even if they think you are in mortal sin.

>where they can be worked through
We both know that these people can't be worked with on anything. Families that decide to reject a child aren't going to listen to that child either.
>Life and relationships and society are not about what you "owe".
Then what are they about, tough guy?
>If your family is willing to shelter you if you fall into privation, drive you to a chemo appointment if you get sick, and fill up your prison account if you are incarcerated.
So they're a glorified piggy bank to you and your mental health can be bought from you by them, lol

I've never understood why family is important to so many people. They're just randos you happened to grow up around. There's nothing special about them. If you don't like them, just leave. If they've committed criminal acts toward you, you can sue them just like anyone else. I got 500k out of my dad for his abuse, my entire family hates me lol and it feels amazing. It basically cured my PTSD by showing me there's justice in the world. There's people who don't even realize it's an option, that your children are property and you can do whatever you want to them, but it's not the law. If you get beat up, harassed, abused, you can sue those fuckers just like if they were anyone else. The hierarchy you feel isn't actually there. Get your money's worth when you cut them out, 10/10 would recommend

How do you go about gathering evidence for a case? My mom sexually abused me when I was 4 or 5 but the only thing I have to go on is my word against hers

>Isn't "coming out" culture harmful and toxic to an already incredibly vulnerable group of minorities?
Yes.
Just because mainstream society insinuates that coming out is your obligation doesn't mean that it is.
Nobody is entitled to know of/be part of your private life, no matter how much they like to pretend otherwise.

>Not a thing and never has been
except i've seen it countless times on this board. the endless insistence to girlmode, to stop repressing, to let people around you know whether or not they want to.

it's also just an overall lgbt movement thing. you can't deny that coming out has been turned into this big dramatic thing that gay or trans people often feel like they have to do. everyone has so much pride for their special identities that suggesting that someone just stay in the closet if they're in a bad situation is regularly met with derision. in reality sometimes the best answer with certain people is just to keep quiet.

>what's wrong honey what's wrong what's wrong honey you got a boo boo
what

Lol I'm doing voice to text, I apologize

>to stop repressing
Repression is a different thing from coming out.

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>We both know that these people can't be worked with on anything.
They can, obviously. Like I said there is a lot under the umbrella of "unaccepting families"

And you're the one who's bringing up dangers, cutting off a support system is a danger, and if you are admitting that this supposedly unsupporting family would care for you in times of poverty, imprisonment, sickness, then cutting them off is far more dangerous. If they are so unsupportive that they cut you off, then they've done your job for you

Society and relationships are about mutually supporting each other. That transactional idea of what you"owe" someone else is completely against any sort of healthy relationship familial or otherwise.

We did mostly documents from teachers and psychs when I was young, if you don't have stuff like that I don't know how it is done