How do you cope with realizing the kind of love you want probably doesn’t exist

how do you cope with realizing the kind of love you want probably doesn’t exist

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by finding meaning outside of that love

i assume you're referring to want a cishet relationship as the girl?

no I’m gay
something different. i guess I want to love someone so deeply that I basically become a lesser part of them, that I get to die and be reborn as part of something pretty
maybe I’m retarded idk

oh yeah, same kinda.

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alcohol mainly, lots and lots of alcohol, also larping as a steppe warlord helps

Being mean on the internet

tried that, made me feel worse than the people I hurt
can I LARP as someone who is loved instead

I ignore it and push through anyways crying and screaming in denial because fuck you im in charge.

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i do lots of drugs and hack at my body with a kitchen knife

I don't need to worry anymore because I've found that love

Take hormones, read fanfiction, cry, repeat until I sue or accidentally stumble upon happiness.

I am numb, I don't relate to my body or life. I don't recognize the emotion you call love. to me it just looks like wierd stressful nonsense. I would prefer to stay out of it.

personally I've given up on the denial or thought that I could ever push through and leaned into the screaming and crying instead, but either way
>because fuck you im in charge
based

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Closing myself off from everyone, games, youtube, netflix, weed, masturbation, Any Forums, therapy, music.

It exists in my personal relationship with God :3

By looking for it anyway, I'm hopeless like that.

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By foolishly clinging on to hope, and trying to achieve it nonetheless

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Don't be silly
love isn't real

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I think I understand that, I want to love someone so much that I can submit to them completely and give full control about everything, they can mold me into their perfect partner, teach me how I should behave, how I should look, how I should dress

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because theres chance it does exist.

This
If I internalized the fact that I could never have the sort of love I want, I think I would literally die. It's really the only thing that could justify all the misery I've struggled through.

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