>2 years on HRT, 26 now >got laser, completely smooth now >got FFS, still hon-y though >voice trained, sound pretty cis >no SRS because i dont have genital dysphoria
but >have to wear wigs bc my real hair is extremely thin. have to constantly worry if people are looking at it, have to structure my life around it, cant ever just comfortably go outside without one >i feel vaguely asexual now, dating is hard because i cant summon up the energy to care >i definitely dont pass, constantly feel like im gonna get hatecrimed despite living in a major US city >dont have any friends bc i feel like my entire identity is just 'transness' and i dont want to push any of my braindead thoughts onto other people >look in the mirror and i dont want this body. i dont want any body. i just want to not exist
i dont even remember why i transitioned anymore. i was unhappy as a man, and i liked what estrogen did to me, but it made life a constant chore and battle. ive spent so much money on trying to attain a better body and its all going to rot away over the next decade anyway
i sometimes think about just detransing, but even that wouldnt be satisfying. im filled with so much ennui at what i made myself go through for 'dysphoria' that the prospect of changing anything about my body ever again makes me disgusted. i just want to be happy, this gender shit never mattered, i think i just conflated them together and rolled with it because it felt right
i gave up on so much for this. i stopped trying as hard at work, i gave up on my plans to go get a PhD, alienated friends/family, etc, all because I convinced myself that gender is the ultimate expression of self, and that once I've finalized it, happiness would shortly follow. And for a while it did. But it was just an illusion, just a bit of novelty that I could've lived life without
im sure some people have such genuinely strong amounts of dysphoria that they NEEDED to transition. but that wasnt me, i just always kinda wanted to be a girl, but it wasnt like, the absolute most important thing in my life. but i made it be, because of how intense gender therapists made it feel. i couldve lived a life as a man and found satisfaction outside of gender...wish i did
Justin Russell
good luck user I'm sure you will find someone.
Carter Allen
Hair transplant surgery is the answer
Joseph Johnson
>all because I convinced myself that gender is the ultimate expression of self, and that once I've finalized it, happiness would shortly follow. Almost all cis people under 40 are miserable. Some because of unregulated capitalistic greed, and some because the culture of shallowness that has consumed society.
Everything is fake, most don't have enough and everyone you see is exhausted.
Having a body that partially matches a set of human made social constructs wasn't gonna make life THAT much better.
Matthew Long
>2 years on hrt, 25 now. >got laser, only face and arms are completely smooth coz poor >voice trained but too scared to use it irl >no ffs coz poor >no srs coz no genital dysphoria
I just look like a regular ass male now, I get made fun of for looking gay and slightly feminine but thats about it, also not sure why I bothered transitioning and don't really remember why I did it
Anthony Adams
for me transitioning is kind of a hail mary. I've only started a few weeks ago, but after achieving everything society/family wanted me to(except for a relationship, which is never happening) and not finding true happiness that was really the only thing left to look for; not hating my body for once.
it doesn't feel genuine, but I have to either try that or try headbutting a bullet.
Isaac Martin
move to the united states if you don't live here, become a part time onlyfans/sex worker, and get a job at starbucks. you'll have FFS and any other surgery done within a year and a half of working
Daniel Ortiz
why is a relationship never happening, user?
Christian Turner
>my body will rot away in my thirties >tranners implying satisfaction with medical transition or even life itself ends so soon
I'm nearly 30 and a kissless virgin, way too far gone mentally for that to be possible. I'm too weird by default and that is a massive red flag even if I did manage to connect with anyone IRL, which I haven't been able to in 13 odd years.
Nevermind the fact that despite my best efforts(losing 25kg or so in the past couple years through diet and exercise) my body still looks like shit.
Easton Myers
too old and washed up for onlyfans probably. My countries wages aren't bad but i'm autistic and basically just live off part time contract work
if only i wasnt so insecure when I was 18, i couldve made a ton of money and peaced out
Nathaniel Murphy
>don't remember why I did it What? You mean you don't feel dysphoria anymore or you've literally forgotten why you decided to transition? If you don't feel dysphoria anymore, then it sounds like it worked. If you've got other issues that's okay, doesn't mean you're not trans lmao. Talk to a therapist.
Samuel Morales
>2 years You probably need more time on hrt. And a hair transplant. And a life outside of being trans.
>i definitely dont pass As in when you go out to places people gender you male? Or you just feel like you don't pass
William Smith
both honestly. yes i need to go to therapy
what else changes after 2 years in HRT?
hair transplants do not work for my level of thinning unfortunately
yes, i do need a life outside of being trans, but i have absolutely no idea how. This shit is so hard and consuming that it’s most of what I think about on a day-to-day basis. Its shocking how any non-youngshit has a life outside of transness
i look like im ‘trying’ to be female, so people gender me female mostly out of kindness. i still look reasonably male though
we got old and wrinkly and genderless so soon user
Tyler Sanders
what happens after 40?
Kayden Thomas
>look in the mirror and i dont want this body. i dont want any body. i just want to not exist :((((((((((((((((((((((((
Leo Sanchez
same i don't even really know why i started taking hrt but it was only ~2months ago I'm just gonna stop now lol
Daniel Lopez
bruh its 2 months, wait at least a year
Colton Kelly
nah if people want to do that then more power to them I don't want infertility, conetits or a broken penis, and i dont really have the dysphoria to justify those effects
Joshua Gonzalez
Quite a bit I think. Mental stuff for sure and the body. Boobs grew and shaped a lot in the 3-5y period. Finally started actually getting fat grown in better places. I started the same age you did so we have to wait for the changes to pile up.
Have you done all the meme hair shit like will powers thing, microneedling, mk 677 etc? I feel like I've seen really impressive hair gains on people with serious baldness.
So it sounds like you pass though? People gender you female but you know they're just doing it to be kind because... Why? You hear them when they think you're not listening and gender you male then? Any concrete evidence other than you just *know* they don't *actually* see you as female? Like I get how tough this is and I still struggle with it myself quite a bit but at a certain point you have to try to genuinely accept reality if it contradicts your perceptions.
The life is tough thing that I'm still working on myself. Covid kind of stopped me from that for a couple years. If you expected transitioning to just magically fix all your unhappiness well sorry that was delusional. Even if we could wave a magic wand and make you cis... Lots of cis people are unhappy. If you don't have major steps left in transition you need to put work in to start moving past it and find out what you want to do with your life from now on. What things did you used to like doing? What things did you feel you couldn't do but wanted to because of your sex? What things sound like you might want to do that you never tried before? You need to start thinking of answers to these questions, and actually think about it not just sit there for a minute, say it's over, then go back to scrolling Any Forums and crying. If you really can't think of anything then you need to start trying new things. If you're not the type of person to just automatically do this kind of thing it's going to be work and you're going to need to put effort in.
