How do I stop hating FTMs?

I don’t really want my initial reaction to seeing trans men to be disdain and disgust anymore.
I won’t claim that I hate every last FT
, but the way I feel about them is like the classic they’re all trash with the exception of rare one-of-the-good-ones who aren’t sniveling little pooners with victim complexes.
I look at FTM boards and threads and all I see are women complaining about men, women complaining about trans women, women looking for attention with their shitty bodies that don’t look good as men or as women, women crying about how oppressed they are. I sit in on group social vid chats that have FTMs on them and they literally talk about their periods to a level detail that you almost never hear most cis women getting into except if they’re worried about their health. Back when they existed, I’d go to lesbian bars with my friends or gf and there would be FTMs with their shitty little facial hair whisps dating lesbians because they would never be able to cut it trying to date people who were attracted to men.
Years and years ago, when I was still young and naïve, I really thought we were all in the same boat and would share some kind of solidarity, and I was always excited to meet other trans people of any AGAB. But whenever I’d go to clubs, groups, conferences, or whatever that involved all kinds of trans people—especially places that also welcomed cis people—there was always this assumption by trans men and cis people of either gender that FTMs were cool & enlightened and so on, while trans women were treated like the opposite of that. Stereotypes of women, misogynists, threats, etc you know the drill.
I get it, really—whenever someone doesn’t pass, yeah, they’re going to get treated like their AGAB. That’s just how it is.
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unironically stop looking at the internet and basing your view on people on that. if most people's ideas of LGBT was based on this board, then it would probably be legal to execute us on sight

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Back then, I was the earliest transitioning trans woman (usually the earliest transitioning trans person) in almost all of the places where I was likely to run into trannies, and frankly most MTFs in those places back then either hadn’t started hormones before 35 if they started them at all, so of course FTMs and cis people (and even some trans women) would see them as men and, if they were the sort of women to be afraid of men, would be afraid of them. Sometimes it would be demonstrated just based on how I’d see them interact with these older trans women (and cross dressers), sometimes it would be spoken about more explicitly behind their backs. But the fact that they felt and behaved that way, instead of just acting like secure adult men, didn’t really make me think of them as men and not just the shittiest women to walk the earth with zero empathy, especially when so many of them looked like fat lesbians.
I’ve met trans men since then who are fine & do act like the men they profess to be, and sometimes look the part. But that remains the small minority of FTMs I’ve met.
I’ve reached a point where I’ve accepted that I probably will never see most non-passing trans men as men, just as I’ve accepted that I don’t really see most non-passing trans women as women. That would be fine, in fact, except that I feel an involuntary loathing for most of them, unless they demonstrate good reason for me not to, that I don’t feel even for most non-passing trans women (never mind cis people or passing trans people of either gender). I don’t understand why that is; it’s not just because I see them as women, because I don’t feel that way about cis women even the slightest bit (or about other passing trans women, on that note). I don’t want to loath them, but I don’t even understand why I do.
I also kind of feel this way about most enbies unless they can actively behave like they aren’t narcissists.
What’s my fucking problem?

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The problem is that I felt this way based mostly on interactions with trans men in real life though :(

Unironicaly change ftm to mtf ,periods for anything dick related women to men and men to women and.... Doesn't that sound familiar?
Honestly if you can't see it idk how to help, all you need to do is notice there is bias because there is a lot of the same shit on your side ur simply not sensitive towards

I want to be able to look at it that way, I really do, but I just can’t. I can’t see obnoxious little pooners and just be like “huh, gross” and move on, it makes me feel so much more revulsion when it’s FTMs and I don’t know why or how to stop

Have you had bad experiences with them? When i say that i don't mearly mean they being obnoxious, i mean they wronging you and having people staying on their side and you believing if they were any other demographics people would not

>What's my fucking problem?

You're an asshole who can't see or understand that people have their very own lives and problems that have nothing to do with you.That's all there is to it. Sprinkle some misogyny on top since you don't even view most FtMs as male, how dare they talk about their bodies and date people with conflicting identities? This whole thread is coated in insulting and degrading language towards those men. You're no better than the people who wronged you.

literally just meet new ones it isn't that hard

Nothing worse than I’ve had other MTFs do to me; I don’t want to get too into the details about it though.