Wearing a helmet for 3 years straight

>wearing a helmet for 3 years straight
Imagine the ear wax.

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Does it stop bodily functions? I'd be more worried about shitting. 🤨

Hair would be ruined, would have to go bald

No.
They're not even comatose.
They're "awake" (unless they're sleeping), with their senses being replaced by virtually generated electrical impulses.
So they're awake, just awake in a virtual world.

Zoomer female: That's literally me.
Now post the zoomer's male version.

Speaking of which, it always bugged me that Kirito looked like a walking corpse when he woke up, but Asuna was in okay shape.

Even my mom makes me take my helmet off so she can blast me with the hose and clean my ears. 😒

Reki literally is incapable of making Asuna look bad.
He won't allow it.

her family had money for ongoing physical therapy

maybe the game has graphics for poop and farts sfx?

imagine how dry her vagina must be

If you were trapped this way how do you think you would die
>Starvation
>Helmet being taken off forcefully
>Dieing stupidly ingame
>Murdered
>other

IIRC in the original web novel Kirito is such a dork that he's commenting about how weird it is that the game allocates resources genital hair. And he's doing this while having sex with Asuna.
I would 100% die in PvP. I'm a PvE god.

>Kirito
That's the one. That's the guy. It's literally you.

No. You just don't use the bathroom in the game. So when they woke back up, they probably spent the next few months constantly shitting themselves because they got out of the habit of using the toilet.

You are correct. Web novel Kirito is a giga dork and I love him

SAO should've been much more tragic.
Imagine a freaky scene where a girl is getting contractions ingame (there's a mental capacity to it, not just physical pain) except she couldn't be pregnant, they had been in the game for over a year by that point.
And then Kirito figures out that she's been raped in her hospital bed

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That wouldn't be dry, but the hair condition is really something to give a thought or two.

Probably murdered. I am an asshole in MMOs. Or I would be in the full schizo camp PKing people thinking it wasn't really and just an extended psychology experiment

We do you people even come from?

I'd probably be killed by that stupid "you can pick up someone's hand and make them push the 'accept pvp' button when they're asleep" exploit.

what people?

Let's not forget that they ended up kissing right after Asuna woke up, even though it's been 3 years since she last brushed her teeth. Imagine all that plaque that's been building up.

>Kill a bunch of people
>It's just a game bro
>Make it out
>Oh shit it was real

The hospital does regularly disinfect comatose patents' teeth to prevent that, you know.

psychology experiments are gay

Like a shark's second row of teeth.

He tries to skyrim his way between floors, gets kicked off the pillar by an out of bounds message, and nearly dies. And faggots think Reki doesn't play video games.

Would you play it?

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