>Jen sets up a “Matchfinder” account, but gets no matches. Nikki sees she used her corporate photo as her profile picture and fixes up her account. She suggests Jen should make an account for She-Hulk, but Jen doesn’t want to. She goes on a boring date with a guy who just talks about himself at a bowling alley. The bill comes and they have a faceoff and reach inside their bags. Jen pulls out a wallet and he pulls out his car keys and leaves quickly, suggesting they should go out again.
>Donny Blaze is a magician with a not-so-enthusiastic crowd. He asks for a volunteer, a drunk girl who introduces herself as Madisyn “with a y, but not where you thiiiiink”. Donny pulls out a sling ring and accidentally sends her to a hellish dimension. She then ends up in Kamar-Taj after giving six drops of blood to a demon and making a deal she can’t disclose. Wong is sitting there watching “The Sopranos”, and in her drunken state, she spoils the episode for him. Wong swears revenge on Donny Blaze.
>Wong approaches Jen for a case. He wants to make an example out of Donny for misusing the mystic arts. Jen asks if he has anything on paper, but Wong says all students make a pact with a higher power. At the preliminary hearing, Wong teleports Madisyn as a witness and she undermines the case. Donny’s lawyer is also a magician. The judge rules that the case will go ahead, but Donny can still practice in the meantime.
>Donny does another show, and tries to send another girl through a portal, but she doesn’t want to because of what happened to Madisyn. Donny then creates a dove, and it flies in the girl’s hand and lays an egg. Out of the egg a baby demon hatches and rapidly grows. Donny tries to send it back home, but a bunch more fly out. Donny asks Wong for help.
>Jen makes an account for She-Hulk and gets tons of matches. She goes on a date with a filmmaker, a bodybuilder who compares how much they can lift, and with a doctor who is really sweet and wants to learn about her. She then takes him back to her place and he spills wine on his shirt, so he takes it off. She then throws it away while he’s getting club soda to clean the couch. They’re about to get freaky then Wong opens a portal behind the couch and asks for She-Hulk’s help.
>She-Hulk and Wong fight the demons and send them back home as they grow even bigger. She-Hulk keeps one, and demands Donny agree to their terms before sending it back. She then teleports back and falls on top of the guy, before carrying him to her room, where they have sex.
>Next morning, Jen is making breakfast. She asks her date to stay for breakfast, but he asks who she is. She tells him she’s She-Hulk not in Hulk form, and he’s clearly disappointed and leaves. Jen is visibly upset. Jen then gets served with a subpoena for copyright infringement – Titania is suing her for use of the name “She-Hulk” as she had already copyrighted it.
>POST-CREDITS: Wong and Madisyn watch more “The Sopranos”, and Madisyn spoils it again.
>She goes on a boring date with a guy who just talks about himself at a bowling alley. The bill comes and they have a faceoff and reach inside their bags. Jen pulls out a wallet and he pulls out his car keys and leaves quickly, suggesting they should go out again. I like that this attempt at more WHITE MEN BAD schlock just makes this guy look like a chad.
Fucking kill me. Who allowed them to do this? As if they wouldn’t tear that fucking show to shreds if it was released today.
FUCK. OFF
Jason Scott
You are now aware that you live in a world, a terrifying world, where there are people right this moment who use terms such as "canon" and "cinematic universe" when talking about films and television shows. A world where imagined characters on a screen are required, according to those who discuss them, to adhere to "ground rules" set out by the creators of said-characters. A world where those that discuss these characters and their actions, are actually enraged if said-characters deviate from the mannerisms expected of them, the mannerisms that may have initially been set in the pages of a... comic book.
Think about that. A comic book. For children. Yes, pictures and words on the same page, which are meant to be read by children, that are actually read by adults. Adults who then bicker and express their frustration at film-adaptations of these comic books not being "faithful". Faithful to a comic book. That's supposed to be read by young children. This is your world. This is the world of capeshit.
I cant even bring myself to read this just to call it shit.
Julian Jones
Based.
Carson Carter
You can’t do that! That’s sexist and bigoted!
Oliver Sanchez
spbp
Thomas Murphy
Nah, it's just a TV show.
Eli Torres
I have no interest in watching this show.
It's clearly for women, and I find most shit aimed at women to be really lame.
Landon Campbell
>Wong is sitting there watching “The Sopranos”, and in her drunken state, she spoils the episode for him. Wong swears revenge on Donny Blaze. Would actually be kino if it were true
Xavier Barnes
Still no Matt Murdock? Goddamn, thats all im here for. Shits a pain to get through.
She Hulk is the women's basketball of MCU. It only exists because it is subsidized by male viewers of male basketball. Nobody really pays attention or cares unless there is drama that is unrelated to the sport itself. Women don't care about it. They won't even watch it out of spite, because it isn't worth watching.
Cooper Johnson
>She-Hulk keeps one, and demands Donny agree to their terms before sending it back Next episode, She-Hulk gets disbarred
Logan Bennett
Its so obvious that this shit was made for children and its still hilarious to hear grown men defend it. Oh you're a gatekeeper. Oh you're mad that other people enjoy something? Wow how miserable you must be. It's insane how infantalized and feminized the modern male is. People who would be raising 5 year olds at any other point in history are consuming shit made for 5 year olds instead, decorating their rooms with dolls and action figures, and dressing up like superheros for Halloween.
America is living through an epidemic of manchildren. Nothing is built here. Birth rates have tanked. We rely on imports for goods and immigrants for labor. The american male has been completely compromised. 80% of americans are overweight. 50% are obese. We don't have a draftable army. We don't have a manufacturing base. Nobody creates. Nobody thinks. Nobody builds. We are a nation of superobese cattle with no purpose other than consuming.
