You are granted a $210 million budget to make a movie but you have to cast Amy Schumer for the main role

You are granted a $210 million budget to make a movie but you have to cast Amy Schumer for the main role.
what would be the story?

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A movie about that lady in New Orleans who tortured her slaves and contorted their skeletons into crabs. I forget her name, but Tariq talked about it in Buck Breaking

One where the main character dies in the first scene and the rest of the cast talks shit about her at the funeral.

The Fart Lady. A president’s fat ugly wife becomes a meme sensation when she farts on accident, and then she becomes infamous for letting farts rip. She becomes a huge celebrity, and then becomes president. She wins the debates by farting into the mic. But then someone gives her anti-fart pills and she starts shitting her pants instead. Then she dies of dehydration.

It's a series of tasteful hardcore sex scenes starring me and various beautiful women.
Amy Schumer is my roommate who is unaware all this pornography is happening as she stands in the background (out of view for me).

A film where Shoemeister eats my ass for one hour. Pay myself 210 million to Co-star and head home.

Title it Slampig
Its about a slampig plotting revenge against the guys who fucked her as practice during high school. Play it off as a comedy until the second half when she finally kills her first victim. Then its just dark & cathartic. Ends with suicide by cop who is the guy who is currently fucking her but doesnt want to settle down or make it official

poignant oscar-bait film about a trashy single mom living in some backcountry shithole in the southern united states, in the same style as Lady Bird and Precious. She will have to get pregnant for the role and the film will feature several gratuitous nudity scenes prominently featuring her pregnant tits

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it's just 120 minutes of me hate fucking her.

Anne frank so she has to starve for 6 months for the role

Its just 2hrs of people calling her a fatass jew ho who only has a career because her uncle is a senator.

I would rather just pocket the money and escape to somewhere like Iceland because nothing is worth of the coming humiliation.

Why does her face appear to be too small for her head?

Live-action Shrek remake.

Fat.

humiliating patrice o'neal to the point that he dies

youtu.be/MylhoTBrLrI?t=83

and then i'd have all the patricels whine and cry about it while amy lives her best life

I use the $210 million to make the most high budget porno imaginable. With S tier writing, directing, and effects. Schumer gets put on an intense diet for the film, so she’s fuckable and not fat.

miss piggy. Then I buy a jet and some coke.

Remake of Dead Poet Society except its in an all girls school in the 90s. Amy plays Robin Williams. I spend about 60 million on it, to make it seem legit. Then I disappear with the rest. The movie is so bad that Amy is shunned and never heard from again.

Imagine Groundhog Day but it's just the suicide montage for the whole thing.

Schumer and Lena Dunham in a Thelma and Louise reboot. This time we film the ending all the way to the bottom with both securely strapped to the car.

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Some lame road-trip comedy and pocket as much as I can get away with

But Shrek is the villain. Schumer plays monstrous version of the princess. At the end Shrek is slain, the princess ends up with the Lithgow character, and she gets to stay beautiful (not Amy Schumer) forever.

A remake of the Belgian arthouse masterpiece Vase de Noces.

a groundhog style day where she gets repeatedly tortured and murdered and is forced to relive the day until the movie sort of just ends with no certainty she escapes her fate

ITT: 12 year old herd mentality

It’d be like Groundhog Day, only the Holocaust and Schumer dies a different gruesome death every day.