You are being forced to write and direct a bioshock movie

You are being forced to write and direct a bioshock movie.

How do you do it?

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I shitcan it.

No, I won't be your free internet think-tank globoshill.

I take all the money and flee to some shithole with no extradition laws
Fuck video game movies

You don't. You just play bioshock infinite instead.

while I don't know how i'd cut all of it down to 90 minutes, I would shoot it like Hardcore Harry and the would you kindly scene would be 1 for 1.

Remove all the Jewishness

Make it as shit as humanly possible because I'm not sure how to make it good. And if I can't make it good I should at least try to make it entertaining

Then what are you left with?

But what about all the Jewishness. I just want to play in a Columbia that's as comfy as it would be if it were real.

Bioshock infinite is the worst of the three. Burial at Sea especially is so FUCKING retarded I wanted to kill Levine after finishing it.

Good point

I scrap the movie and make an animated TV show based off the in-game assets and using the audio logs and whatever VAs I can pull from the original cast to make a show about the founding of Rapture and its downfall

Didn't play the DLC. Thought the main game was retarded enough. But redpill me on it, I can take it

Can I just do what I want or am I forced to write a dumbed retarded story with niggers and fags in it?

Brutally filtered

Yes, it is current year +7 after all.

Probably start playing the games first, or else i have no idea what its about

just do Boardwalk Empire but underwater city

Make it about the people living in Rapture.
From the rich weirdos to the sea snail farmers or whatever.
Have the show slowly progress to the point where Rapture goes off the rails and then have it be more like lord of the flies/hunger games.
Add a big daddy and little sis character and boom you’re golden.

Also make it less cringe than Levine would.
This is a rare opportunity where you can get away with tweaking the source material without complaint so long as you are doing it smarter than the original author did.

From the perspective of one of the unfortunate inhabitant. Moving his family into the city for a new promising life, surviving the new year tragedy, and ends with the the dude being forced to become a Big Daddy because it was the only way to be together with her daughter.

Yeah it sucks, and I'm drunk

Burial at Sea was kino

The only good thing about bioshock is the setting. The art team carried the entire thing on their backs

After the events of Infinite apparently there's 1 iteration of booker still alive (how? Doesn't matter baby just take it)

After killing the final booker Elizabeth loses her powers. Because Levine has such a hard on for Elizabeth, he retcons EVERYTHING regarding Rapture and makes her the reason for everything about it. He makes her:

>The reason how Big Daddies were developed (Songbird)
>The reason why little sisters bond with big daddies
>The reason how Fontaine was able to start the rebellion
>The reason for Andrew Ryan's downfall
>Essentially the one allowed the story of Bioshock 1 to start.

FUCK LEVINE U FUCKING HACK

Then I'd write about Coachella Jackson, a lesbian person of color that was Andrew Ryan's secretary but secretly was behind most of the innovations in Rapture.
The viewer will find out how she initially supporter the concept of the underwater city because Ryan lied to her and promised a paradise of equality, but upon seeing that he's a filthy objectivist she'll join Atlas in rebellion
Atlas won't be Frank Fontaine btw, he'll be secretly Ellen Ching, a chinese worker that felt exploited by the system but felt she needed to create a male figure be a of sexism
Atlas is unambiguously good but marred by negative elements represented in the character of Fontaine, whole try to usurp leadership from Chong at some point.
At the end, Rapture collapses, but Ching and Chaquilla (who have fallen in love) manage to escape to the surface with the little sisters.

The only kino thing about it was how big Elizabeth titties were