Firsties be like: "I have to pay my taxes or I will go to jail"

>firsties be like: "I have to pay my taxes or I will go to jail"

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I was watching stranger things and I was so baffled that they sent a teenager to jail just because she smacked a rollerblade in another teenage's face

I steal old discarded technology like circuit boards or microwave ovens and shit from a trash recycling station near where i live and the guards/workers threatened to call the police on me several times

For stealing trash

>thirdies be like "I have to be straight or else I will go to jail"

>mfw I work at the tax office
it's the most boring shit you can imagine

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we thirdies be like
>i don't pay taxes, i litter, vote for the same retards every election, and regularly give bribes
>wtf, why is my country a shithole? must be the fault of westoids

Firsties be like
>I love this song, I'm gonna buy it

I don’t have to pay taxes because I don’t have any reportable income. I own a real estate investment and management LLC that has zero profits because of reinvestment into the business. And I just live in one of the houses I’ve designated an office space for company tax purposes. I use a company cash fund for groceries and bills. I have small business retirement and health care plans. I lease a company car as a business expense (merc)

America is so fucking easy

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not paying taxes is worse crime than kidnapping torturing and murdering a child no cap

Most LatAm countries legalized gay sex decades before even criminalizing slavery

>I use a company cash fund for groceries and bills.
Incredibly illegal.

>tf
>tp

>noooo you have to fund shaquandra's 9th bastard child

Oops but who’s gonna know because I file it as company expenses and the dollar amount is low enough where I can just take it from petty cash so it doesn’t have to have specific transactions tied to it oh nooooo

>Several thousand dollars every year is low enough.
Keep larping, dude.

couldn't you get audited for this?

He's not doing it unless he's black. Everyone else knows the penalties for getting caught doing this are severe and result in short prison sentences.

>i haver to have sex with women i'm going fucking insane

"petty cash" is a tax waste anyway

LLC - limited liability corp
Means that anything deemed a necessary business expense stays on the company books and not on my taxes

>500 a month in petty cash covers groceries and basic purchases, just write it away as office supplies
>Car and gas are business expenses
>Entertainment is a business expense if it’s for the purpose of client relationships or sales efforts
>Health and insurance are provided by the company

All my expenses are covered because I live frugally and don’t go around blowing cash. And since any income goes into property investment (mortgage and bank payments), this balances out the earnings on the books with expenses. it also adds assets, so I can report no profits while adding more capital. And any appreciation can be written off by leveraging debt with loans to buy more properties/land

The worst thing firsties do is pretend to be thirdies