Since I was a kid I am obsessed with China and the CPC...

Since I was a kid I am obsessed with China and the CPC, I don't know why but I always had an hyperfocus on China and everything related to chinese culture and politics, and the funny thing is my teachers always considered me a gifted child, so I had to enter in a gifted and talented education program. I remember my mom made a China-themed party in my 10 yo birthday and that was the first and last time we made a party to celebrate my birthday, therr was even a Mao Zedong portrait in my birthday cake (althought my birthday had many decorations related to other elements of chinese culture and religion).

When I was a teenager I started dating a japanese girl and that was my first and only girlfriend, she was also very sympathetic to China too and we always talked about China's economy and politics, unfortunatelly we had to break up. I'm still searching for an asian girl to date, but I have no problem dating a western girl who shares the same tastes, I'm actually interested on a girl from the Communist Party of Brazil youtu group that I joined recently.

I grew up to become a maoist but not a marxist-leninist-maoist like Abimael Guzmán and those so called anti-revisionists because I really can't criticize Xi Jinping reforms and the current market socialism based economic system of China, I deeply support the Three Represents theory, the Scientific Outlook on Development and Xi Jinping Thought. its fascinatint to see how China's leaders are extremely intelligent people, high graded academics, its an example to the whole world. I'm also having mandarin classes since I am 12 years old, also studying international relations at college because I really want to work in some kind of diplomatic mission to China, I never ever visited China but thats my dream.

I feel like my heart is in China and not in Brazil, I want to know if any you guys share thr same love for a country that isn't yours.

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Se você ama mais outro país, e ainda mais um país comunistas, do que sua própria nação, você não passa de um subversivo inimigo pátrio.

have you read mao's little red book?

This can't be real.
Tell me it's a troll effort

I see you have read The Governance of China. Quite based, comrade. Yes, MLMs are anti-revisionists but then again everyone claims they are anti-revisionists. Majority of MLs hold that China is practicing Socialism-with-Chinese-Characteristics so they don't see a problem with Deng's reforms. The same argument applies to the claim that Vietnam is an AES.
As to your question, I don't love China like that. I do appreciate what they have achieved. But that's about it; I don't revere them to the extent you described, and I do share similar sentiments (appreciation) towards Cuba, too. How about you?

OP these are classic symptoms of autism. I'm not even memeing. The childhood stuff especially

Yes, and also answering I read Xi Jinping's book The Governance of China, its avalible in lots of languages I think everybody should read, its a fascinating book, the man is a genious. A fun fact is that I never read any of Karl Marx's books, not even the Communist Manifesto, but I have to appreciate Marx thoughts.
I really can't understand why vietnamite people and governament hates China so much, this weakens the Sinic world a lot for nothing, China and Vietnam ARE brothers in socialism.

>I really can't understand why vietnamite people and governament hates China so much
They have good reasons to desu. China propped up Khmer Rouge and later invaded Vietnam.

Vietnam propped up the Khmer rouge early on too, until they switched sides.

china always supports cambodia against vietnam - no matter who is governing cambodia.

Answering your question on Cuba, I don't know much about this country but I like how Cuban–Chinese relations are evolving, Castro and El Che were both heroes, thats undeniable.
I understand Khmer Rougue committed mistakes but I don't think we should blame chinese leadership at that time, Cold War was really complicated, all those things we know about the Khmer Rougue weren't so clear at that time, also soviet imperialism became a very harmful thing to Asia. I also don't think we should stay in the past, now in the 21th century China and Vietnam have much more reasons to stay togheter as partners than to fight.