/brit/

Spicy, but what happened to her asymmetric boobs?

Condom slipped off whilst I was shagging (complete accident) and now this bird's accusing me of stealthing and rape and all the rest of it. What the fuck do I do now?

Big Boy Breakfast for me my lidsssss

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>asymmetric boobs
Literal virgin fingers tapped that one out

So no more Shakespeare or George Orwell?

youtube.com/watch?v=7OvW8Z7kiws

Ex gf drank a shot glass of my piss and now it is my fetish

Virgin post rofl.

buy smaller condoms

sainsbury's employee made fun of my voice to his colleague after I thanked him for helping me. now I think twice before thanking others lest I be insulted again

do not cum...do not cum...
I'M GONNA CUM

this is why the working classes are thick as muck

*mocks your voice*

Sucking a slug

went to a sissy tea party

sucking a basketball

me monero node is down
cant load my wallet

just realised adios means "To God". Mad how basically every way of saying "hello" and "goodbye" in most languages is some variation of that phrase.

Cum in Poley's arse

Mean

love the feeling of booze so much

no more goyslop for me de lads

No they're not. It's still Macbeth, A Christmas Carol and An Inspector Calls. Although Wilfred Owen tends to be on the Year 9 or 10 curriculum now, not Year 11.

All this "woke" and "decolonisation" shit tends to be taught to Year 7/8, at which age they don't really care about that stuff anyway, not even the so-called "BAME" ones.

t. English teacher

Try drinking it next time

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imagine if Kanye West was president haha lol

Business idea: urinal shorts sleeve

love shoving things up my arse

"Adieu" would be the same, right? And "goodbye" means like "God be with you" or something right?

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just your average bloke, me
*pops a bog standard golf ball into my mouth and makes a slurping noise*

no one man should have all that power

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what happens here?

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For wen dem ketch a Englan,
An start play dem different role,
Some will settle down to work
An some will settle fe de dole.

Jane says de dole is not too bad
Because dey payin she
Two pounds a week fe seek a job
dat suit her dignity.
Me say Jane will never fine work
At de rate how she dah look,
For all day she stay popn Aunt Fan couch
An read love-story book.

scromitting

ktim

question to gym-goers:
does your legs and arse getting thick impact the trousers you can wear?
anywhere in particular you get trousers that fit well?

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I like there, it is shite

What's it like being a teacher, is it easy to pull chicks? You ever gone out with any fit female teachers?

no it's not
be quiet

kek this is me

i.4cdn.org/wsg/1654599867932.webm

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Yeah. "Goodbye" is a contract of God Be With You and then I think they changed the God to Good to fit with the other phrases like Good Morning. My personal favourite is "Hello" and "Hello to you too" in Irish. It's "God With You" and the response is "God and Mary With You".

poverty, teen pregnancy and crimes against the english language

got some family there

just bite the bullet and go sexcore lad

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scouse mandem
youtube.com/watch?v=iu-WkA6MjKk

doesnt really answer my question

>Crane drops tank with poisonous gas in Jordan's Aqaba port; at least 10 dead, 251 injured

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most of the girls i hook up with are from other schools, don't want to get fired

Met my doppelgänger

We at /brit/ say Rest in Peace to them.

me after eating eggs on toast

sad that

Not noticed any difference desu. All the fit teachers have boyfriends too.

‘Ce

youtube.com/watch?v=QJgzvAYgb4Q

>Sir, I'm afraid that poisonous gas we needed has been lost in transit.

fucking hell, genuinely useless at industrial jobs them lot

You'd get fired for dating a fellow teacher? Really? Unless you mean you're dating pupils, but I assume not

kek

Not that unique but I did that massive zipline in Wales

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>IRL mate says my name
>immediately uncomfortable, feel like i'm being doxxed
i need to go out more lads

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well he asked for unique experiences so why did you bother replying? stupid cunt

this is actually decent desu

can someone explain the alan titchmarsh gimmick to me?

my wives

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i.4cdn.org/wsg/1656197322077.webm

yes im sure someone can

Got arrested for terrorism
Or the time I met bojo and talked to him for about an hour about ancient greek democracy

More of a 11:30 type of accident than a 16:18 type of accident. Probably still had the fear from the weekend

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>All the fit teachers have boyfriends too
Guess that makes sense

Do you enjoy the job or hate it? Since you're teaching secondary school kids, do they give you shit a lot of the time?

lmfao that webm

ummmm Qatarbros????

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ching chong bing bang i no likey le other chingo bongos

TRANSFORMERS MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE

lol

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genuinely something wrong with them lot
7/10 gimmick I'll give you that

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i.4cdn.org/wsg/1656200082360.webm

>I met bojo and talked to him for about an hour about ancient greek democracy
story?

andy murray is english scum

and how will the bender-loving, blm-worshipping fifa freaks respond to this? by doing absolutely fuck all.

but liberalism is the west's religion

Actually he asked for the "most unique experience you lads have had" you illiterate cretin.

On good days there's nothing like it.

>Since you're teaching secondary school kids, do they give you shit a lot of the time?

Depends what class. Most classes are fine behaviour-wise except the odd bit of chattiness. I have a really tough Year 9 class which I only teach once a week.

Are you a paedo

Have not heard a single person so much as mention this band IRL, and yet they are pushed fucking everywhere.

yes

If I was I wouldn't be allowed to work in a school.