Hmmm

Hmmm...

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I'm only 60% sure this is a joke.

I mean, how that giant head alien lady got Luke's lightsaber was one of JJs original "mystery boxes". It's not to far fetched. Perhaps some plucky, sexually questioning female-presenting protagonist could set out on a brave journey to the ruins of the Death Star to recover Luke's lightsaber and provide the rebellion New Hope (tm)

Autism

>the ruins of the Death Star
Why the fuck would the lightsaber be there?

Fucking sperg

Hard Drive is a Hard Times spinoff you dunce.

>all the questions fans have had about a missing hand
who the fuck ever cared

You do know there's a book that maps out a clone made from his hand called Luuke, right?

My headcanon is that the hand had so many midi-chlorians in it that it came alive, tied the lightsaber to itself with some sort of string, and crawled its way into some worthy person's lap.
Then the alien lady stole it from that person.

it's shitty "joke news" website similar to the onion. it gets marketed here heavily

We already know it became Thing in a spinoff called The Addams Family

>literal entire universe
>scared to invest in world building for any single part of it to create spinoff franchises potentially
>proceed to not even get decent people for the revival
>wow it's like so hard to make movies
Retards.

I unironically would watch.

I still can't believe how this entire franchise was simply handed over to women, children that don't know any better, faggots, trannies and niggers. Blows my mind.

Resorting to the "Luke's severed hand/lost lightsaber" thing was THE sign we were dealing with a hack screenwriter.
No one watching the OT ever thought to themselves "gee, I wonder what happened to that lightsaber that fell into an infinite abyss".
They couldn't think of another way to get a lightsaber into the film?

What about his boots?

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They already put his hand in one of their shitty comics. Regardless, the ST has already aped so much fucking awful old EU shit that it should come as no surprise when they just copy it yet again and have Luke cloned from his hand again (even though they implied Palpatine used it to clone Snoke or some shit).

>Luke's hand and lightsaber fall into a gas giant
>Disney: "Woah, now here are some interesting loose ends that we have to tie up"
We truly live in a clown world. Next thing you know they'll be telling us how the trash compactor monster in ANH got there and how it was force sensitive, again.

>callously disregard enough content to fill a wing of a library
>run out of ideas in five years
How do you fuck up this bad? Official Star Wars fanfiction was a cottage industry that kept numerous companies in business, literally everyone can do it but the biggest entertainment juggernaut in history

>still hanging on to the fanfiction tier shit that was the EU

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A story for another time