/esc/ - Eurovision Discussion Thread

why did aussies wanted to be part of this, dont they have their own friends to have singing contests

>Austronecian Song Contest
kino

>>BITI ZDRAVA
>>BITI ZDRAVA
>>BITI ZDRAVA
>>BIT-BIT-BIT-BITI ZDRAVA

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Fucking hate the kike producers for putting Ukraine RIGHT in the middle followed by some unexciting shit just to REALLY hammer it in.

>Azerbaijan shouldn't
Eat my ass, buddy. Literally the best voice in the entire contest.

Idk? Maybe it's a pom and wog thing.
I don't know if anyone who cares about Eurovision here.

Source on this one?

I don't mind it. But when the one hosted by jews was sponsored by MyHeritage, that really activated my almonds.

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Does that sponsor steal your DNA, per chance?

Why are you being so antisemitic?

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No but if I wanna find my heritage, what's stopping me from just doing it myself?

>Fucking hate the kike producers for putting Ukraine RIGHT in the middle followed by some unexciting shit just to REALLY hammer it in.
Had they genuinelly wanted Ukraine to win they'd just put them as the last performing country

here we go

>Belgium
3/10 generic rnb zoomer looking as
>Czech
8/10 based modular synth vaporwave chads
>Azerbaijan
1/10 trash, plus the yeezy getup is peak cringe
>Poland
5/10 boring skyfall looking ass
>Estonia
7/10 based estonian cowboy
>Australia
4/10 another giga generic song in the final for who knows what reason
>Sweden
8/10 mommy vibes
>Romania
6/10 catchy homokino, at least something weird in the final
>Serbia
7/10 based Latin proverbs enjoyer

ROBBED TIER
>San Markino
9/10 homokino bullkino transparent shirtkino, biggest robbery in recent memory, I mad
>Cyprus
8/10 how tf you just say no to Venus, juries need to be punished like the heretic degenerates they are
>Ireland
7/10 catchy slagkino deserved better than this

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I forgot Georgia in the ROBBED tier, absolute banger of a song with excellent visuals, 8/10

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They would if they could, but each entry has to randomly draw from a bowl to decide which half they'll be performing in. Ukies drew 1st half, so producers worked with what they were given.

Your family tree is not enough, fellow white, you have to test yourself on a cellular level. Don't worry, we'll take care of that for you.

I don't think the last spot is the best one, maybe second to last sandwiched between some forgettable entries

FUCKING STOP RIGHT NOW AZERBAIJAN WAS ONE OF THE BEST ENTRIES SO FAR AAAAAAA
Generally agree with the rest, though.

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Fuck I forgot to watch yesterday. Did anything interesting happen?

um sweaty it was terrible THOUGH

also forgot to rate:

>Spain
7,5/10 Ethpaña finally embracing its perreo roots with the matador getup
>UK
6/10 this nigga happy because he's friends with justin bieber n shit
>Germany
2/10 please ban americans

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um sweaty I sat through THREE acts who couldn't sing for shit at which point I almost gave up but then based Azerbaijan came out with that vocal control on the quiet parts, that growl on "WEATHER" and those high notes at the end and it was like a breath of fresh air

Cyprus shouldve got into the finals
Also that irishwoman is swarthy

I gave it another listen and yes it's not a 1/10 like I remembered, he has a good voice, still not finals material for me 2bqh

I think he'll get something like 13th place, but I'm glad he went through. Still bummed about the running order in general. They shoved most of the WOW FIREWORKS DROP THE BASS WOOP WOOP songs into the first half, ending with Ukraine, and then it's a bunch of... less energetic stuff until you finally get to Moldova after a decade has passed. Will be rooting for them just out of spite.

yeah wtf is up with that running order, second half is a snorefest, this is not in line with my inebriation schedule.

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Adapt your schedule.
>Germany
piss break
>Belgium
shit break
>Iceland
cum break
>Australia
wash the dishes break idk

What the FUCK is Greece going to do now that they can't circlejerk Cyprus?

Malfunction. Then give it to... Serbia maybe (muh orthodox)?

>tfw solidarity points to ukraine from the (((international jury))) will steal the victory from our mommy kino

You're naive if you think the pity points will only be from the juries. Also your mommy still bows before Lithuanian classy mommy.

>Also your mommy still bows before Lithuanian classy mommy.
Based. Will vote 20 times for Lietuva

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Here's my rating:
>Finland
3/10 extremely boring bon jovi type ballad, done to death
>Israel
4/10 - a bit overdone, instrumental is not that bad but the voice and stage show were shit
>Serbia
6/10 - decent veiled anti-covid song, nice stage performance and performed in Serbian
>Azerbaijan
4.5/10 - by far the best voice, sleepfest song and terrible stageplay
>Georgia
4/10 - really wanted to like it but it was simply too boring and simplistic for genre they were going for, stageplay pretty kino
>Malta
2/10 - almost the quintessential eurovison song, almost put me to sleep
>San Marino
7/10 - i really liked the song, lyrics (or the bits I managed to understand) were very cringe, one only homo bit done pretty well/entertaining
>Australia
1.5/10 - boring voice, boring performance. Has Australia come with anything other than homo acceptance songs since they joined eurovision?
>Cyprus
3/10 - I am being biased here because I feel like I've heard this exact song 50 times this year alone. Might sound good to Westerners, but I am have heard at least 80 songs exactly like this just by living in a Balkan country
>Ireland
4/10 - sounds exactly like American zoomer tiktok pop songs, nothing more to it, really
>Macedonia
2/10 - shit song, shit lyrics and I always cringe when eastern european women say 'baby'. Just sounds weird.
>Estonia
3.5/10 - I see what they were going for but i dislike this new electro-country, sounds too generic. The Netherlands had a better country performance a couple years ago
>Romania
5/10 - very homo but I found the song really catchy, I may be biased tho
>Poland
2.5/10 - Nice looking guy but cringe effects, forgettable voice and boring song
>Montenegro
2/10 - see Malta
>Belgium
6/10 - sounds like an early 2000s boy band in a good way, pretty pleasant to listen
>Sweden
1.5/10 - genuinely forgot this song the second it ended. Sportswear/mobile phone commercial tier song
>Cezchia
3.5/10 - liked the voice, everything else was bead, instrumental especially

>cum break
I'm saving this for SVVEDISH MOMMY

Are you sure you can recharge quickly enough after Lithuania?

I wasn't raised no quitter bruh, I might even go for Greece...

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>gonna miss the start this saturday
>France is at the start
...im so mad

To be fair, your guy's song was flamboyant, butchered-spanish kino. Really liked it.

Some of my 2 cents:

>Malta
Poor girl must have thought this was the JUNIOR Eurovision Song Contest. Unfortunately, this is the big boy one so her cookie cutter pop trash with generic self love lyrics didn't hold up.
>Belgium
Shit was so cash. For some reason it brings me back to my childhood playing GTA IV, listening to The Vibe 98.8 while taking Roman to a strip club. This is just like what you'd hear on that radio. Ah good times.
>Poland
His voice is too correct and academic for his own good. All those perfect OoooooOooooOoooooOoooo CarRy MeA Waaayy don't mix well with the pop feel of the song. Also wtf is with the dementors sperging out around him?
>Georgia
Something different but I forgot all about it after, like, 20 seconds? I challenge anyone in this thread to sing a snippet from this song off the top of their head. Can't remember, can you?
>Israel
lmao

>Greece
corr blimey! kop a geg at that slapper's greasy beef flaps! aha! have a bit of that, my son! 'ere, you can see the full outline of her clunge 'n' everyfink! GET IN!
*KLONK* *KLONK* *KLONK* *KLONK* *KLONK*

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You'll see them in the winner reprise. Don't worry.

I prefer serbian mommy though

>Georgia
Fast unundersrandable gibberish
LOCK ME IN LOCK ME OUT
LOCK ME IN LOCK ME OUT
LOCK ME SIDEWAYYYY
repeat

Least based brit

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the lyrics were fun as fuck 2bh, might as well go full homo mode if you're going down that path anyway.

È una stripper, sì
Questo amore è uno strip club, ah
Il mio cuore è in un freezer, freezer
Sono a letto col killer, thriller
Like a virgin, virgin
Non è un film, London Calling, corri
Ah, I love Britney
È il diavolo in una Birkin (ah-ah)
Ma che stupida voglia che ho
Quella stupida voglia
Metto la gonna più corta che ho
E vado fuori, ah
E vado fuori di me
I don't know (ehi)
All I need is love (ehi-ehi)
All I need is love (ehi)
All I need is love
All I need is love
Ma che stupida voglia che ho
Ma guarda che donna che sono
Nessuno mi può giudicare
Ti fidi di me?
Che stupido uomo
Cowboy, il mio cuore è il suo sex toy
Il mio bad boy
Madonna su Playboy
È una Barbie, ha seicento cavalli
Io il suo beagle, è il mio Personal Jesus
I don't know (ehi)
All I need is love (ehi-ehi)
All I need is love (ehi)
All I need is love
All I need is love
Ma che stupida voglia che ho
Ma guarda che donna che sono
Nessuno mi può giudicare
Ti fidi di me?
Che stupido uomo
Ma che stupida voglia
Ma che stupida voglia
Metto la gonna più corta che ho
E vado fuori
E vado fuori di me
Ma che stupida voglia che ho (all I need is love)
Madonna che donna che sono (all I need is love)
Nessuno mi può giudicare (all I need is love)
Ti fidi di me?
Che stupido uomo
I don't know

frfr

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CIRCUS MIRCUS

Our song is nor anti-covid though l. It’s about how everyone is obsessed with being physically healthy, while people are more depressed than ever.

Damn, Serbia brought the deepest lore this year.

Y nobody mention Portuguese cutie?
>27 years old
God tier genetics.

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she cute

>27 years old
thats like 70 in female years

Exactly. She doesn't look her age.

what colour are her eyes? green, brown? or hazel? :hmz:

>tfw you will never sit cross legged on the grass on a beautiful sunny day with a perfect view of mommy Cornelia's cleavage
bros

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that's a man

>I TOOK THE FIGHT, BUT WAS I RIGHT?

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>>Finland
>3/10 extremely boring bon jovi type ballad, done to death
I dont get how they came up with such shitty song, they could have just made some remix of their older hits.

youtube.com/watch?v=7gwO8-oqwFw
youtube.com/watch?v=LcB0LNrMFW4
youtube.com/watch?v=l7-sTM7XqYo

Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. You're never in the safety zone.

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is being in the middle good or bad

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