OPENING SCENE:
COFFEE SHOP
JERRY AND GEORGE
JERRY:
I still don't get it.
GEORGE:
It's simple. The blockchain is like an immutable line of transactions. Before another transaction is made, you have to verify the past transactions, so yours can be added at the front.
JERRY:
Sure, but what is the point? Why not just use regular money?
GEORGE:
It's decentralized Jerry, no central banks involved. All you need is a computer, and you're good to go.
(ELAINE ENTERS)
JERRY:
George was just telling me about how he invested in cryptocurrency.
ELAINE:
That's awful! Do you know how much electricity those things cost?
GEORGE:
Oh! Here we go!
ELAINE:
It's terrible for the environment!
GEORGE:
And your hairspray isn't bad for the ozone layers?
ELAINE:
At least I have hair!
GEORGE:
That does it! I'm leaving!
ELAINE:
Hey why don't you spend all your crypto winnings on a hair transplant?
(GEORGE LEAVES)
JERRY:
Geez, Elaine, what's gotten into you? You know he is very self-aware about his hair?
ELAINE:
I know, I'm sorry. It's just that new guy I've been dating. He just goes on and on about crypto. He won't shut up about it!
(GEORGE ENTERS AGAIN)
GEORGE:
Aha!
ELAINE:
Aha what?
GEORGE:
You're no better than me! You're daying guys who are bad for the environment! That's basically encouraging them.
ELAINE:
Well at least I'm not the one listening in on a private conversation!
GEORGE:
Private?! We're in public.
OPENING SCENE:
Jerry: whats so great about those tokens anyway
George: theyre non-fungible jery
Jerry: non fungible?
George: they cant be funged!
Kramer: you know my friend bob sacamano, he funged a token once
Jerry: what happened
Kramer: lets just say he wont be funging again
this sucks
boo
>Kramer: lets just say he wont be funging again
it only gets better every time it's posted
Would watch and laugh again, 8/10.
Jerry: Wait, you bought those coins because you read about it on an anime forum?
George: you don't get it, they're the future, Jerry, THE FUTURE!
I appreciate this post OP.
kramer
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get
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KRAMER:
It's...decentralised
JERRY:
Decentralised? So no center?
KRAMER:
No center Jerry, think about it. No center, no middle, no core.
JERRY:
But no center? What if I NEED a center?
KRAMER:
NO CENTERS JERRY. IT'S LIKE A DONUT
JERRY:
NO CENTERS?
KRAMER:
NO CENTERS JERRY! NO CENTERS, WE DON'T NEED EM, I DON'T WANT EM. TO THE MOON JERRY, TO THE MOON.
Elaine get onlyfans.
>but thankfully no thumb-thumbs
Susan gets an onlyfans. George likes the money but is upset about everyone seeing his fiance naked.
Kramer saves the images and shares them with Newman.
>G: I finally found the one, Jerry! Rust!
>J: Rust?
>G: Rust!
>J: Oh not that new thing again. Have you *seen* the syntax in that? They clearly don't want people using it.
>G: With memory safety like this baby has they can use any syntax they wish.
>J: And that name. 'Rust'. What kind of name is that for anything technical? Should've been called 'Sheen'
>G: Oh yeah, name it after an imploding crack addict. Thats much better.
>K: You know my friend bob sacamano never uses any memory safety. Ever.
>J: How is that even possible?
>K: Hes got a terrabyte of RAM Jerry, he just doesn't care! Hes letting his memory slip and slide all over the place (does funny jerky movements)
>(Elaine comes in, looking disheveled)
>J: What happened to you?
>E: What happened to me? What happened? Its that damn Rust is what happened!
>G: What are you talking about?
>E: Its that stupid language of yours George. I stayed up all night doing a Hello World. A Hello World! I was letting this be that I didn't know what the hell was going on.
>Jerry got vaccinated, but his current girlfriend has a weird cough, and when pressed if she took the shot she answers vaguely
>Elaine got vaxxed, but her current boyfriend got vaxxed by a different brand and, according to her, acts all superior about it
>George didn't get vaxxed, but pretends to, because he's going on a date with a woman he met shitting on non-vaxxed people. Now he has to falsify papers to keep the ruse going
>Kramer's been vaxxed 10 times, claims it boosts his immunity, and buys Chinese booster shots from Newman
Terrible
Gold
You know my friend, Bob Sacamano? Well he got a vaccine! Ooohhhhh YEAH!
Now he sits in a chair by a window all day saying, "My name is Bob"
Take your mask off, Kramer. Flu season's over.
>GEORGE:
>And your hairspray isn't bad for the ozone layers?
>ELAINE:
>At least I have hair!
I hate how Elaine always had the upper hand in those zingers
This made me laugh