Pitch your jokes, Any Forums

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Holy crap Lois! This is worse than the time I fought Thanos
Cut to Peter fighting Thanos only to fart and embarrass himself and then everyone asks him to leave

HOLY 4TH WALL BREAKERINO

he's going to reference the snap and its gonna show him doing some wacky killing related activity and all of the people in it are going to disappear and hes going say something stupid like "Aw man talk about a kill steal!"

>"She turned bad AND died? But she was on the lunchbox!"
>"They can't all fit into this elevator...WAIT THEY CAN."
>"Before we dance off I just want you to know..." *BANG* "...I have a gun."
>"I hope this doesn't end with energy blasts and holding hands."
>"You have a metal arm? I have no arms! Gimmie!"
>"If you think about it it's pretty weird a billionaire arms dealer decided to use a kid to fight in a 'Civil War' in Germany. Anyway how's May? Still a fox?"
>"Hey, Moon Knight. Who's that big bird skeleton behind you?"

>hey deadpool, what time is it?
>well cable, it's morbin time!

I remember seeing the first one.
They had some comedians in there because some of the jokes were funny, I mean, if they didn't censor the punchlines.

>"I AM THE WATCHER."
>"...I can't tell by your voice if you're from Hulu or Netflix so I don't know if you're relevant."

No Weasel, no watch

ITT: Any Forums writes jokes for lazy deadpool 3 writers

Kek

The only answer is cast Sean Gunn as Weasel.

>Mention how easy it is to acquire black market Chitauri guns
>Claims that he got retcon into the MCU the same way Captain Marvel did
>Talk about an identity theft and how Hulk and Watmachine were also victims of identity theft
>Claims people forgot who he was because of an incident involving magic
>Joke about how Stark is somehow involved in his origin story
>Reveal that his online gaming name is NoobMaster69

If Mickey Mouse is the villain this movie will be 10/10

"Wow, you look like crap. What happened, piss off Amber Heard?"

cool trips

Deadpool 2 was so shit. They're really making another one of these?

Am I the only person who doesn't want Deadpool in MCU?

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The current state of Star Wars media. At least we have a new Jedi game coming.

Its not like he'll probably matter much. He's always off in his own little world, doing his own thing with little impact on the rest of the universe. At least thats how he was in the Fox X Men universe.

>”Oh I get it. It’s because I’m a mutant, isn’t it? That’s why I’m being treated like a second class citizen in this cinematic universe of bullshit. Well it’s not my fault FOX wouldn’t sell out fast enough to our round eared corporate mas…..I mean come to Disneyland this summer!”

He already felt like he was before

"Man, I used to be way more violent before I got bought out by that stupid mou--um, hail Lord Mickey!"

I hope so user, I found the DP movies as critiques of capeshit genre and were able to do rauchy stuff under Fox. I just can't imagine Disney and the mcu being so care free.

>"Oh wow, I can use this holographic projector to look like the star of Free Guy? How oddly convenient."

Have a scene of Deadpool taking a shit on the script and then winking at the camera

>Hey, say something funny.
>Why?!?! My (insert family member here) just died! I'm in mourning!
>You have to, its MCU policy.

I hope he does the holy menstruation line when he meets Ms. America